


august slipped away into a moment in time

by jordanreads



Series: if one thing had been different, would everything be different today? [1]
Category: The Society (TV 2019)
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst, Mutual Pining, Pre-Canon, because i cannot for the life of me see the binghams as a long island or CT shore family, folklore screams hassandra and this is my gift to you all, your basic summer on the cape pre-canon fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-18
Updated: 2020-12-05
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:40:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 69,433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25963756
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jordanreads/pseuds/jordanreads
Summary: But it was nice.Cassandra thought the whole thing was nice.However, she didn’t tell Allie the guy down the street that she’d been spending almost all her time with was Harry. In fact, she didn’t tell anyone the guy down the street was Harry. She figured he wouldn’t want her to say anything, so she didn’t. When the summer was over, she knew they’d both go back to their normal routine and life would continue as it always did. He would ignore her and she would pretend she didn’t like being friends.Or something.
Relationships: Harry Bingham & Cassandra Pressman, Harry Bingham/Cassandra Pressman
Series: if one thing had been different, would everything be different today? [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1884505
Comments: 58
Kudos: 78





	1. salt air, and the rust on your door [i never needed anything more]

**Author's Note:**

> obviously this is pre-canon, but in a world where we still have the new harry styles album, cucumber juul pods, and a summer marvel movie - oh and harry and cassandra like each other, like _like like_ each other. working on a sequel from harry's pov

_salt air, and the rust on your door [i never needed anything more]_

Cassandra was blissfully happy. 

It was a gorgeous mid-July day, not quite hot due to the breeze coming off the ocean, and she was taking a break from reading the latest Sally Rooney novel by laying on her stomach to get some color on her back.

She was finally able to relax and take it easy for the next few weeks. Until -

“- Hey, I don’t think I’ve seen you around here before...” Cassandra propped herself up on her elbows to acknowledge the voice to her left and suddenly wished she hadn’t.

“- Oh my fucking god.” From his spot standing above her, Harry Bingham feigned gagging. “Holy shit, nope - I did not just - nope.” He ran a hand through his hair distractedly and took a couple steps back. 

Cassandra fully rolled over, so she was no longer laying on her stomach, and fought the urge to throw on her linen beach coverup. Though he had his Ray Bans on, she could still feel Harry’s eyes on her and hoped they didn’t linger too long on her chest scar, made ever so prominent thanks to her cherry red bikini top. 

“Hey Harry…”

“What the fuck are you doing here? This is a private beach.” He crossed his arms over his chest. 

Still thrown off at his presence, her reply didn’t have as much bite as it normally would have. 

“I know. My grandparents have a house down the street.” She pointed further down the stretch of relatively deserted beach and used the action as an excuse to draw her knees up to her chest protectively. 

She could tell he didn’t believe her. “Your grandparents?” 

“My mom’s parents, the Walkers? They bought the house with the widow’s walk and the blue shutters back in January.” He didn’t say anything, so she felt the need to explain further. “They’ve lived in Florida for the past ten years and my mom gave up trying to tell them that most people their age preferred to stay down south, not come up north-”

“-Your sister here?” 

She didn’t like how he asked. All suggestive and like Allie’s presence would have been preferable to her own. “No, she’s at camp.” He made a face. “She’s a counselor at a place in Maine.”

“Hmmm. And you’re just here for the week?”

“Nope, the rest of the summer.” It was currently July 15th. 

Harry threw his head back and groaned. “What will the blue bloods in the New England’s premiere, Ivy League admissions offices say if they find out you’re not saving Sudanese refugees or teaching disenfranchised youth to read?”

Okay, fair. So, she had been doing that - sort of. 

Since school got out in late June, she had been a counselor at a day camp for at-risk youth in Bridgeport, but then she had an _episode_ with her heart and her parents thought it would be good for her to rest up before senior year and spend some time at the beach with her grandparents. Today was her first beach day after it rained the first two days and she hadn’t felt well yesterday. 

But Harry didn’t need to know any of that.

“Nope, just spending some time here. Getting a jump start on my summer reading, which I’m sure you haven’t done yet,” she teased, then added, “you?” 

She didn’t care either way, they could easily keep out of each other’s business here, even if they were technically neighbors.

“We come here every summer. It’s good to get away from _people_.” He waved a hand in her direction. 

“I bet,” she quipped. 

With her hand shielding her eyes from the sun, she gave Harry a proper look for the first time the conversation started. He looked, unfortunately, even more handsome than he did when she last saw him at school. His skin was already tan and his navy bathing suit contrasted nicely with his white button down, while a canvas backpack was hanging off his left shoulder. 

Leave it to Harry to still wear his stupid button downs even during the summer. She didn’t see his usual boat shoes, though figured they may have been in his backpack. At least here it would have been normal to wear them. 

“So you just prowl the beaches of Chatham looking for your next unwitting victim every morning?”

He shook himself. “Wha-what?”

She shrugged. “Is this what you do everyday? Pick up unsuspecting girls on the beach?”

He smiled wickedly. “Hmmmm, sometimes. But normally they aren’t an uptight bitch.”

“Fuck off.”

He slid his sunglasses down the bridge of his nose, just enough so Cassandra could see his eyes rove over her, before he slid them back up. “I think you’re getting a burn, _Cassie_.”

And then he turned and set off further down the beach until he seemingly found a spot he liked and sat down with a huff. The entire time, Cassandra kept her eyes on him, waiting for the moment when he would inevitably turn back to look at her. They may have hated each other, but she still knew him. 

Sure enough, he looked back and Cassandra gave him her most winning smile and a twinkling wave. He flipped her off and she laid back down, slipping in her airpods to drown out all thoughts of Harry Bingham.

\------------ 

They saw each other on the beach again over the course of the next week or so. And everyday they steadfastly avoided each other. 

Sometimes Harry came down with his little sister, Kennedy, and sometimes he came down with his dad, but occasionally he came down alone. Always in the afternoon, usually once Cassandra and her Nana finished their lunch. 

Cassandra wasn’t _looking_ for him per se (she did stare at him occasionally, though she’d deny it if asked), she was just observant. But apparently she was not discrete. 

It was during her second full week with her grandparents, the last full week of July, and her and Nana were down at the beach for the afternoon again. 

“You should go up and talk to him.”

“- Huh? Who?” Cassandra snapped out of her thoughts as she watched Harry and his sister play one of those paddle games near the water. The navy bathing suit was back, sans the white button down. 

Nana smiled. “The Bingham boy. I’ve noticed you staring at him the past few days. His parents are very nice, at least his father is, I’ve never met the mother. And his sister always cuts through our yard to get to the Cooper’s, sweet girl. Haven’t met him yet, though.”

Cassandra shifted in her seat. “I am not _staring_ and I already know him.” Nana looked surprised. “We go to school together. We aren’t _close_ ,” she finally settled on the word after some deliberation. 

She wasn’t about to tell her they hated each other, seemed like an extraneous detail. 

“Well, regardless of if you’re _close_ or not, it’s very rude of you both to ignore each other, especially if you’re going to be here for the rest of the summer. Might be good to have some friends around, you know hang around with people your own age? I don’t know how much more true crime your grandfather and I can stomach.” 

Cassandra let out a whine. “Don’t make me go over there, I promise I’ll watch something else if you don’t make me go over there -”

“- Kennedy?” Nana shouted at the brown haired girl further down the beach playing with Harry. “Kennedy?”

The girl turned around, looking for her caller until her eyes settled on Cassandra’s grandmother. She waved and started walking over. 

“There you go, get up and introduce yourself.” Nana all but pushed her out of her chair. Cassandra had no choice but to do as she was told, not wanting to look like a complete idiot in front of both the Bingham kids and her grandma. 

She met them a little further away, near the water. “Hi,” she said kindly as Kennedy got nearer. Harry trailed behind her, looking like he wanted to be anywhere else. “You must be Kennedy.”

Kennedy nodded. “Your grandma’s really nice, she lets me cut through your yard all the time.”

“She mentioned that,” Cassandra said, smiling at the younger girl. “I’m Cassandra.”

She smiled, showing a mouth full of braces. “This is my brother, Harry.”

“We’ve met,” Harry said tightly. 

Cassandra could tell he was glaring at her even with his sunglasses on. Again, she felt self conscious standing in front of him in her navy bathing suit. Today, she was wearing a high waisted bottom with a bandeau top. She idly noticed they matched. 

“Wait, does that mean - are you like _Cassandra_ Cassandra? From school?” Kennedy asked, looking between her and Harry, who she noticed was suddenly looking intently at a seagull on the jetty. 

Cassandra swiveled her attention back to Kennedy, wary of what Harry had told his family of their school relationship. Neither of them confirmed Kennedy’s statement, but their non-answer seemed more than satisfactory for the younger girl. 

“He never said you were pretty. And he talks about you _a lot_ ,” she emphasized, causing Cassandra to blush.

Harry snapped his attention back to the two girls. “Shut the fuck up, Ken, or I’ll tell dad about your juul.”

She snorted. “You won’t because then I’ll tell him about - oh wait, where do I start, dipshit?”

Cassandra laughed lightly, which pleased Kennedy beyond belief, but made Harry glare at her. “Sorry.”

“Do you want to come over for dinner tonight, Cassandra? Dad’s getting lobsters.” 

She clearly had an ulterior motive and it most likely involved pissing off her older brother. 

“I can’t tonight, sorry.” She couldn’t quite hear what Harry mumbled under his breath, but it sounded a lot like _pity_. “We’re actually going into town for dinner later.”

Kennedy nodded. “Next time then - wait, Harry,” she turned to her older brother, “Cassandra should totally come with us to the drive-in tomorrow!” 

“Absolutely not.”

See, if he had said she could come, Cassandra probably wouldn’t have taken Kennedy up on the offer. But since he was so adamant in his refusal -

“- I’d love to go. Actually, I’ve never been to a drive-in.”

Kennedy smiled. “Awesome, they’re playing the new Marvel movie and some random bro-comedy after, but it’ll be fun! I’ll get your number from Harry and text you all the details, but we can pick you up around 7:30?”

Cassandra couldn’t help but smile in return. “Sounds perfect.”

With a final smile, Kennedy set off towards her and Harry’s beach chairs, leaving Cassandra and him alone. 

The ease she had felt with the younger girl was gone and she felt self conscious again. She crossed her arms over her chest. “Guess I’ll see you tomorrow then?”

Harry took a couple steps closer and peered at her. “So it would seem. You know, I think you’re getting a sunburn on your shoulder.”

He said something similar to her the other day and she figured it was just a coverup for checking her out. 

“What? No, I’m not.” She looked frantically between her shoulders, only to see that her right was unfortunately getting a little pink. 

“See you later, Cassie,” he said with a smirk before jogging after his sister. 

With a huff, Cassandra walked back over to her grandmother. “We’re all going to the drive-in tomorrow.” 

“See? Now you have friends and your grandfather and I can have some time alone,” she teased. 

Cassandra rolled her eyes good naturedly. She had just settled back into her chair and reading her book when she felt her phone buzz with an Instagram notification. 

_therealkennyb_ has requested to follow you

She smiled at the username and hit “Accept” and “Follow Back,” noticing that they had two mutual followers, _binghamharry_ and _kelly_aldrich1_.

The second name made her pause - Harry’s sister still followed his ex girlfriend and Kelly still followed her back? Maybe they weren’t actually broken up? They’d been on breaks before, but Cassandra could’ve sworn Harry was the one who ended it this time.

Before she could dwell on it further, she got a DM from Kennedy reminding her of the pick up time - 7:30 - and the movies, making note to tell her that they’d probably get back around 1:30. 

And then she asked Cassandra for her number _because my brother said he doesn’t have it_

Okay, so that was very much a lie and a stupid one at that considering they’ve had each other’s numbers since like eighth grade. She swiped through her phone to her messages app and scrolled until she found what she was looking for. 

Their last text was about the student council election in early June. Cassandra had told him the debate time had changed from C block to D block and wished him good luck. Harry just said thanks and they hadn’t texted since. 

She would’ve let it slide, but Harry went out of his way to not give his sister her number. A glance down the beach told her they had already left for the day, so she started typing instead.

_What the hell?? You definitely have my phone number, why didn’t you give it to your sister?_

She didn’t have to wait long for a reply. 

_who is this?_

_Shut up Harry_

_is this Cassandra?_

_Don’t be a dick, like I said you definitely have my number_

__

_And don’t be mean to your sister_

____

__The next texts came in quick succession._ _

_i’m not mean to her_  
_and for the record i don’t talk about you a lot_  
_my mom was just really into the whole student council thing and we do debate and stuff together so i mention you occasionally_  
_normally it’s about how you’re a pain in the ass_

_Whatever you say…_

____

_fuck off_  
_we’ll pick you up at 7:30 tomorrow_  
_don’t be late, ken is really territorial about the drive in_  


A smile had slowly crept across her face during their texting exchange. She liked that it was so easy to piss him off. It reminded her of debate practice and student council meetings where they’d seemingly go at it for hours.

No one could challenge her like Harry could. It was like they fed off each other, getting more competitive as they got older. She suddenly remembered how they were almost friends in eighth grade. They even went to the winter dance together.

But then Harry changed when they got back from break and their new found animosity came to a head after Cassandra dumped a plate of chocolate covered churros on his lap during their end of the year Spanish class party. They hadn’t been friends since, but Cassandra did recall having a nice time at the dance and then when he dropped her off afterwards -

“-Something funny?” Nana asked next to her. 

Cassandra wiped the smile off her face. “No. Just texting someone.”

Nana hummed, but moved the conversation along. “Ready to head up? Our reservation is for six.”

It was already four thirty and Cassandra still had to shower and call her parents. “Yeah, let’s go.”

____

\------------ 

The next day, Cassandra sat waiting on her grandparents’ front porch for the Binghams at 7:25. She wouldn’t put it past Harry to deliberately show up early and see she wasn’t ready and use it as an excuse to leave without her.

Sure enough, a slate grey Jeep Wrangler pulled into the driveway at 7:28. Though he could definitely see her standing there, Harry honked the horn obnoxiously as Cassandra walked over. Meanwhile, Kennedy clambered into the backseat, leaving Cassandra to slide into the passenger seat.

“Hey, where’s the Maserati?” Cassandra teased, referring to the ridiculous car Harry had gotten for his seventeen birthday in May. It was the envy of the student parking lot. 

He threw his arm over the back of her seat and smiled wryly as he backed out of the driveway and set off down the street. At least she got a chuckle out of Kennedy. “You’d like that, wouldn’t you? Going to the drive-in in the Maserati?” She rolled her eyes. “It’s at home, the salt air isn’t good for it.” 

She scoffed before turning around to greet Kennedy. “I’m so excited. Can’t wait for popcorn.”

Kennedy smiled. “Me too and Red Vines.” 

“Of course.” Cassandra nodded solemnly. 

“Harry likes Junior Mints,” Kennedy said, faking a gag and flicking him on the back of the head. He blindly flailed one arm behind his seat, trying to hit her back.

“Excuse me, I’m driving.”

Kennedy rolled her eyes, but leaned forward in her seat, so her head was wedged between Harry and Cassandra, and asked Cassandra how dinner with her grandparents was the other day (lovely) and what she did during the day (woke up late, watched TV, and read on the back porch). In turn, Cassandra asked her about the sailing camp she went to up in Truro. 

The only time Harry showed any sign that he was paying attention to the conversation was when he complained about having to pick Kennedy up at camp every afternoon. Other than that, he focused on the road. Cassandra could, begrudgingly, admit that he was a good driver, even if he mainly drove with one hand the entire time. 

But it was easy to talk to Kennedy. She was surprisingly mature for a 13 year old and even reminded Cassandra of Allie to an extent. But she could tell Kennedy wanted her to think she was _cool_ , which Cassandra also would totally have done had the roles been reversed. Plus, it was nice that she thought Cassandra was cool even after all the shit Harry had talked about her over the years. 

She quickly found they were both far too obsessed with Instagram and Tik Tok - yes, Cassandra Pressman enjoyed Tik Tok - and that they loved British period dramas. In addition to sailing, Kennedy also played field hockey and would be going back to Connecticut in August for a camp. And she loved Marvel movies and confirmed that Captain Marvel was her favorite, even above Spiderman, who was Harry’s. 

They chatted for the better part of the drive to Wellfleet and Cassandra almost forgot Harry was in the car until after a slew of increasingly more depressing Frank Ocean and Tame Impala songs in a row, Kennedy groaned. 

“What the fuck is this sad boy shit you’re playing? Give me your phone.”

“Don’t fucking swear.” Harry still handed the phone over. 

Kennedy typed away frantically. “I know you have it in here somewhere.”

“Don’t screw up my playlists, okay?” He kept his eyes firmly on the road.

She rolled her eyes. “I’m just queueing something up.”

As the current song faded out to a new one, Cassandra recognized the keyboard and high-hat intro and of course, Harry Styles’ iconic _hey_.

Cassandra turned back to look at Kennedy, who looked just as pleased. “I just saw him in Boston with my sister, he was so good.”

“Right? I’m still thinking about it, we were in the pit. This Harry,” she tilted her head to her left, “took me and my friends.”

Harry glared at Kennedy in the rear view mirror before he angled his body towards Cassandra. “It was awful and for the record, my dad paid me to take them.”

“ _You_ were in the pit at Harry Styles?” Cassandra asked, the glee evident in her tone. 

He tossed a brief look over at her before looking back at the road. “He _totally_ made eye contact with me, highlight of my year.”

Kennedy guffed. “You had a great time,” and then aside to Cassandra, “he totally knows all the songs, too.”

Cassandra was dumbfounded. “What’s your favorite?”

“I don’t know any of them that well - owww!” Kennedy flicked him on the back of the head. “I’m driving, what the fuck’s wrong with you?”

But as the last notes of the song faded out, Harry said quietly, “I like the first album better.”

Cassandra smiled at him. “Huh, I could see that.”

Of course, the next track came on and Kennedy started singing and doing completely ridiculous dance moves while still buckled in her seat in the back. 

And it may have been the festive spirit of driving down Route 6 on a completely gorgeous summer night or the fact that she knew Harry wouldn’t make fun of her because she had the perfect piece of blackmail to use against him, but Cassandra started singing right along with her. 

And then it happened. 

Almost as if it was a muscle memory, at the chorus Harry and Kennedy did this completely nerdy shoulder roll and sang along. Like if they were standing up or something, they would have done a slide. 

Cassandra had a feeling this wasn’t the first time they’d done this and started laughing hysterically. Both of the Binghams joined in, though Harry was a bit more sheepish than his sister. 

“You tell anyone about this, you’re dead.” Cassandra held her hands up in surrender. 

By the time they got to the drive-in ten minutes later, all three kids had abandoned their embarrassment and were blissfully singing along. And despite Cassandra’s protests, Harry paid for her ticket too, smoothly handing his black card over to the girl in the ticket window. 

“So how does this work?” Cassandra asked once Harry pulled into a spot halfway down the lot and on the far left. 

Harry shifted the car into park. “You sit in the car and turn the radio to the correct station and watch the movie. Pretty self explanatory…”

She resisted the urge to roll her eyes and have a snippy comment so soon after he did something nice for her. Instead, she turned back to Kennedy. “So popcorn and candy? My treat?”

Kennedy nodded. “Yes, popcorn and Red Vines. You can go with Harry. I’ll watch the car.”

They looked at each other briefly. “Okay,” she said eventually. 

It was clearly a set up. Cassandra didn’t like the smile on Kennedy’s face when she turned back to look at her after she got out of the car.

Harry had a long stride and Cassandra spent much of the walk to the concession stand trying to catch up with him. The rest was spent in awkward silence as they fell in line with the rest of the drive-in attendees looking for their popcorn and candy fix. 

“So…” Cassandra rocked on the backs of her heels. 

“Don’t feel the need to make conversation, you’ve lost your captive audience.” He pulled out his phone and started scrolling through some app. 

Cassandra tensed. “Your sister is nice, we have similar interests.” Harry hummed absently. “Fine, we’ll just stand here.”

And they did, for about five minutes they stared at their phone while they waited for the line to inch up. Cassandra almost let out a sigh of relief when the kid behind the counter asked what they wanted. 

Without asking Harry, she ordered two popcorns and a thing of Red Vines and then looked at him to see if he wanted to add anything else. 

“And some Junior Mints and -” he briefly looked at Cassandra assessingly, “two caffeine free Diet Cokes.”

It was a thing with them. They always got caffeine free Diet Coke before their debate meets. Ever since their first debate meet at Darien High freshman year, when Harry didn’t have any quarters and the only thing he could wiggle out of the cafeteria vending machines was caffeine free. They crushed their opponents and took it as a sign. Every debate meet, Harry would show up with two ice cold cans and they would silently toast each other. 

Cassandra didn’t want to like it. 

With a smile at Cassandra, the cashier read the total and she went to hand over her card to pay. 

Harry scoffed. “Seriously, just let me pay.” 

“It’s fine, you paid for the tickets.” And they invited her to come along, she was just trying to be fair. 

“Yeah and it was $13 versus like $45 for whatever shit Ken wanted. Just let me do it.” He handed the cashier his card, waggling it above Cassandra’s.

“What, you don’t think I can pay for it?” Cassandra crossed her arms over her chest and cocked out her hip. 

Harry threw his hands up. “It’s not always a class warfare issue, okay Cassandra? I just wanted to do something nice and you’re really making me regret it now.” 

The cashier was still standing there staring at them and Cassandra was suddenly reminded there was a huge line behind them. Her cheeks grew hot. 

“Just take the fucking card,” Harry said under his breath to the guy. She didn’t fight him and neither did the cashier. 

Once they paid, Cassandra snatched the popcorn buckets off the counter and muttered her apologies to the cashier and the people behind them, before turning on her heel and leaving Harry to manage the sodas and candy by himself. 

“Hey!” Harry said from somewhere behind her moments later. She only stopped because she didn’t remember where the car was parked. 

“Let’s not mention this to Ken, okay?”

“Fine.” He gave her a tentative smile in return and they made their way back to the Jeep where Kennedy wanted to know what took them so long. 

Just as they finished dividing up the snacks, the previews started and the movie not long after. 

The movie was long. Way longer than Cassandra thought it would have been. And she was constantly aware of herself and every time Harry fidgeted in his seat or dug his hand into the popcorn bucket nestled between them. They did that horribly cliched thing when they practically sprang apart the few times their hands brushed. 

She could definitely tell he was invested in the movie, though. It was oddly endearing that he was still such a nerd about some stuff, even if she wasn’t particularly enjoying it, herself. 

Don’t get her wrong, it was definitely cool being at the drive-in and she would definitely go again, but she wasn’t able to follow the plot as well as she would have liked and Kennedy had to keep explaining the plot to her. Harry didn’t like that and kept shushing them. 

When it seemed like the movie was coming to a close, Cassandra leaned back to ask Kennedy a question, only to discover she was fast asleep, bundled up in one of Harry’s crewneck sweatshirts. 

Instead, she leaned in to ask Harry, “like half of them just died, what are they going to do for the rest of the movies?”

“That’s kind of the cool thing about it, nobody really knows. The new Spiderman comes out later this year, so I guess we’ll see.”

Cassandra nodded. “I liked him - Spiderman,” she clarified. 

He shrugged. “He’s always been my favorite.” She idly remembered him dressing up as Spiderman for Halloween one year when they were younger. 

“Not Iron Man?” Harry shook his before and then knocked back the rest of his Junior Mints. “Seems like your type.”

“I don’t know, Spiderman’s just a kid and he’s still able to do all that shit. Plus he’s smart.”

It seemed like they were all pretty smart, but she didn’t want to be mean, so she just nodded. “Makes sense. Kennedy said she likes Captain Marvel -”

“- She’s hot.” 

Cassandra laughed. “Think she‘s a bit more than that…” she said referring to a previous scene. 

Harry turned to give her a smile. “Fair. Now shut up, I want to watch the end.”

The end credits started rolling soon after and while some cars started leaving, _amateurs_ Harry called them, many people stayed around till they finished and a final scene played. After which, those who stayed around went to get more popcorn or headed to the bathroom. 

They silently played on their phones for a few minutes, Cassandra scrolling through Instagram and Harry looked to be on Reddit, while they waited for the next movie to start. When the dancing hot dog and popcorn on the screen proclaimed they had two minutes till the next movie started, Cassandra put her empty soda cup into the popcorn buckets and held it out to Harry to do the same. He shook his head, signaling he still had some soda left. Once Cassandra came back from the trash can, the movie started. 

However, ten minutes into the next movie, Harry leaned his head back against the headrest and let out a groan. “God this is so fucking bad.” 

“Thank god it’s not just me.” 

He chuckled. “Wanna dip?”

Cassandra tossed a quick glance at Kennedy in the backseat. “You don’t think she’ll mind?”

“Nah, she never makes it through the second movie. My dad used to have to carry her inside after. Now I just pinch her till she wakes up.”

“Then I don’t mind.” 

Harry turned the car all the way on, but kept the headlights off until they passed by the ticket window. He didn’t speak until they pulled back onto Route 6. 

“Well congratulations, Pressman. You are no longer a drive-in virgin.”

In spite of herself, Cassandra let out a chuckle. “Are you glad you were my first?” she teased, leaning into the joke.

“It wouldn’t have felt right with anyone else,” he returned right back. 

She shook her head, but smiled. “It was fun, would definitely like to go again-”

“- Up for round two already? My goodness, such stamina for a first timer -” She hit his chest with the back of her hand. “- hey, I’m driving.”

“Then drive, Henry.”

He frowned. “Henry? I’m not a _Henry_.”

“Harrold? Harriet?”

“Funny,” he said flatly. “It’s actually just Harry. Harry James, after my grandfather.”

She nodded once. “It fits.”

“Well, what about you?”

“Cassandra Marie,” she groused. She hated her middle name. 

Harry chuckled. “Every girl’s middle name is either Marie, Elizabeth, or Katherine.”

True, it was Allie’s. Alexandra Elizabeth Pressman. 

“What’s Kennedy’s?”

“Howard.”

“Excuse me?”

“Kennedy Howard Bingham. It’s my mom’s maiden name.”

She wanted to ask about his mom and if she ever came out to Chatham on the weekends. Karen Bingham was a force to be reckoned with and someone Cassandra didn’t want to randomly run into one afternoon. But she didn’t want to screw up this pleasant, but slightly odd conversation she was having with Harry, so she just said, “yikes” and left it at that. 

“It could be worse, could be Doyle.”

“Whose middle name is Doyle?”

Harry snickered. “Clarke’s. I saw it on his transcript once.”

“That’s...unfortunate.”

“So was his transcript. He is _unfathomably_ stupid.”

“Okay, we can’t be all _Mister I Got a 1580 on my SATs_.”

“Says Miss 1580…”

It used to bug her that they both got the same score on the SAT, but it was probably for the best in the long run. Less to fight over. 

“Touche.” Harry kept his eyes on the road, but she definitely saw his smile. 

The drive home was a bit eerie now with no other cars on the road. It made their drive up to Wellfleet seem like a different lifetime altogether, rather than just a couple hours. The current music Kennedy queued up suddenly felt out of place. 

“You can put your sad boy shit on now, I won’t make fun of you.”

Harry hit the fast forward button a couple times on the radio, getting out of the queue. “Thanks.”

“It wasn’t that bad.”

“No?”

Cassandra shook her head and angled herself towards him. His face was slightly illuminated by the car radio display, so she could still get a read on him. 

“Just not the right mood. Do guys make playlists?” He scrunched his nose. “Like for different moods or stuff? And like I don’t mean a pregame playlist or anything like that.”

“Are you trying to ask if I have a playlist for laying on the floor and crying to Taylor Swift?”

She chuckled. “You said it...”

“Yes, I make playlists. No, they aren’t _that_ specific.”

Then they were definitely specific. She wanted to press further, but he spoke first. 

“Can we just sit and - I don’t know, enjoy the silence?”

Cassandra crossed her arms over her chest and angled her legs towards the door. “Fine, it’s your car.”

Twenty minutes later, the bulk of which was spent in moderately uncomfortable silence and the rest with Cassandra nodding off to sleep, they finally pulled into her driveway and Harry shifted the car into park. 

“Listen,” he turned to her, suddenly serious, “my sister seems to like you for some weird reason and she doesn’t have too many people around to talk to, so I wouldn’t be morally opposed if you ever wanted to hang out with us.”

Cassandra smiled despite herself. “I mean, I’d still have to hang out with you,” she teased, “but I’d like that.”

“She’s cool, even if she crashes out on Red Vines.” They both laughed quietly. 

“Alright, text me if you guys want to hang out. You actually have my number,” she stressed. 

Harry held his hands up. “Fine, we’ll probably go to the beach in the afternoon. Ken has sailing camp in the morning.”

“Of course she does…” He just smiled. “But yes, I’ll be at the beach tomorrow. Thanks for letting me come with you guys, I had a good time.”

“I’m always nice to a girl for her first time. Now get out of my car, I want to go to bed.”

She rolled her eyes and slid out the car. The porch light was still on and Cassandra got her key out of her pocket. Only once she was safely inside and the porch light was off did Harry drive away. 

Cassandra silently crept upstairs, trying not to wake her grandparents, and slinked into her room. The door clicked shut behind her and she flopped onto her bed. 

She had fun - with Harry? And his sister, granted, but Harry? Harry, who knew the words to Harry Styles songs and whose favorite Avenger was Spiderman. Who completely doted on his rather excitable 13 year old sister and remembered to order them caffeine free Diet Coke, of all things. 

Harry, who she was slowly realizing was definitely not the same guy that told her six weeks ago that people only voted for her for student council because they felt bad for her about her heart. 

She wasn’t about to give him a free pass or let bygones be bygones anytime soon, but she could see herself maybe becoming friends with this Harry. Or at least _friendly_. The way he sang along in the car with her and Kennedy kept flitting through her mind for some reason. 

He had a nice voice. 

She shook her head and pulled out her phone, hoping to distract herself by going through her Instagram. Aimlessly tapping through her stories, she came across one that made her pause from _therealkennyb_.

Kennedy must have snuck it while they were driving, but it showed the backs of both Cassandra and Harry’s heads and them singing during their impromptu car concert. It just said _finally finding some common ground_. 

She watched it three times. And then she clicked to the next story, only to see it was the backs of their heads again, but this time looking at the title card from the first movie. It included a poll question asking for _Red Vines or Junior Mints_ preference. She picked Junior Mints.

Her cheeks flushed. What the hell was going on with her tonight? One nice night with Harry and his sister didn’t erase all the bad shit they put each other through. Even if she did have a lot of fun. 

She plowed on through the rest of her stories, checking in on all her friends, when she came across _kelly_aldrich1_ ’s story from her vacation in Charleston. 

Shit. _Shit_. 

Kelly followed Kennedy. Kelly saw Kennedy’s story. 

Cassandra quickly swiped back to Kennedy’s story, praying that you couldn’t tell the girl was her. Thankfully, she had a baggy sweatshirt on so all you could really see to differentiate her was her shoulder length blonde hair. Plenty of girls had blonde hair and her, admittedly subpar, singing voice wasn’t so immediately recognizable that you would know it was her. 

It could totally be anyone. 

The next one yielded even better results since it was so dark. The only reason you’d know it was the same girl was if you saw the previous post. Kennedy hadn’t tagged her or anything, thank god. 

But why didn’t she want Kelly - or anyone else for that matter to know the girl was her? It was _confusing_ and too late. She had to go to bed, it was nearing two. In any case, they probably wouldn’t hang out together that much anyway, right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> also i made a [spotify playlist](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1MBtmDHmFub4QEqEL0dqxk?si=hVRxrKjjQT-ZyCwwwBNg4w/) if that’s your thing???


	2. your back beneath the sun [wishin’ i could write my name on it]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so apparently i cannot find my chill and wrote ~20k for this chapter. that being said, chapter count as been extended slightly. hope you all enjoy, i've seriously had so much fun writing this, even with the whole cancellation news! let me know what you think - kudos and comments seriously make my day - happy late august!

_your back beneath the sun [wishin’ i could write my name on it]_

Okay, so they started hanging out together. The three of them, that is. There had yet to be a solo Cassandra and Harry outing, which was honestly a bit of a relief. She didn’t know what they would talk about without Kennedy acting as a buffer. 

As late July slipped into August, the three of them established an unspoken routine of meeting up at the beach in the afternoons after Kennedy got back from sailing camp and Harry got back from what Cassandra later found out was surfing on the outer Cape. 

Because apparently Cape Cod Harry Bingham surfed? 

And then it progressed to having dinner at each other’s houses with their families a couple times a week and introducing Cassandra to every halfway decent ice cream place within a five mile radius. They’d already gone through eight places in the last ten days and Kennedy kept telling Harry he was going to get fat. Cassandra always got Moose Tracks or something similar, while Kennedy preferred the most ridiculous flavors, like Dinosaur Crunch or Cereal Killer, and Harry, the psycho, always opted for mint chocolate chip. Between that and the Junior Mints, she was beginning to think he had some sort of weird mint oral fixation.

Through it all, Harry completely charmed the pants off her grandmother - _just like his father_ , Nana would tease - and could talk about World War II history and the PGA Tour for hours with her grandfather, never mind the fact that Harry had never actually golfed and her grandpa could be found on the course more days than not. 

Similarly, Cassandra got to know Harry’s dad better. In fact, his dad adored Cassandra. Whenever she’d come over for dinner or to watch something on Netflix with Harry and Kennedy, he’d always make a point to talk to her; ask her what she was reading, stuff about school, and if Harry actually needed to take five APs next year to “beat” her or if four would suffice. (Four would have sufficed, but Harry really wanted to take AP Chem for some ridiculous reason, while Cassandra was more than happy to skip out on her science requirement senior year.)

Mr. Bingham was a managing director at some fancy private equity firm in the city, but had been cutting back on his hours considerably due to some health issues. He didn’t say what they were and Cassandra didn’t ask, knowing first hand how much of a sensitive topic it could be. She also didn’t ask where his mom was and none of the Binghams said anything about that either.

But it was nice. 

Cassandra thought the whole thing was nice.

However, she didn’t tell Allie the guy down the street that she’d been spending almost all her time with was Harry. In fact, she didn’t tell anyone the guy down the street was Harry. She figured he wouldn’t want her to say anything, so she didn’t. When summer was over, she knew they’d both go back to their normal routine and life would continue as it always did. He would ignore her and she would pretend she didn’t like being friends. 

Or something. 

Cassandra would get into Yale early action and Harry would do - whatever the hell it is that he does. She would pretend she didn’t know he likes to listen to Harry Styles in the car like a sixteen year old girl or that sometimes he can be so incessantly sweet to her grandparents and his sister that she finds her heart beating faster. Or that one night she had a sudden desire to kiss him when he had ice cream dripping down his chin. 

He caught it with his thumb and sucked the excess off. They made eye contact and she wished, not for the first time, that they were alone. She could have sworn he did it on purpose. Because he _had_ been doing stuff like that on purpose lately. 

Nothing completely ridiculous or anything, Kennedy was normally around - though she had been making herself scarce lately. But little things. 

Like asking her to put sunscreen on his back the other day because he hated the aerosol spray, claiming it clogged his pores. Or when they’d be out getting ice cream and he’d sit so close to her that she could feel the heat coming off his body. Never mind that there were always plenty of seats available 

It was _unsettling_. Because Cassandra liked it. 

She liked when he sat too close to her on the massive sectional the Binghams had even though there was plenty of room for them all to stretch out three times over. And she liked it when he would walk her home at night after they were up late watching a movie or when they would walk up and down the beach looking for shells and sea glass. Sometimes his hand would brush against hers. 

So she was starting to like him. Harry, the boy who she’d spent years fighting with over the best grade with in class or arguing on a different side in debate or acting across in the school play. 

Shit. 

——

Yet even with all the beach days and evenings getting ice cream, Cassandra sometimes still felt like shit. Her bad days were still few and far between, she’d had two since she got to Chatham, but the third one hit her like a Mac truck. Nana had literally just gone out to get some lunch for her at her favorite sandwich place and her grandpa was golfing with some friends, so Cassandra was laying on the couch watching Netflix alone. 

“...Thanks, Mrs. Walker. I’ll let her know.” The screen door creaked open. 

From her spot on the couch, Cassandra watched Harry creep into the kitchen, looking like he just ran up from the beach and wearing a salmon bathing suit and a worn _Cape Cod Sea Camp_ t-shirt. 

“Cass?” he called out, creeping around the kitchen and gradually making his way into the family room. 

She sat up a little to acknowledge him and paused her movie. “Uhh hi, what’re you doing here?”

He looked sheepish as he stood in front of her, blocking the TV. “I uhh texted you a couple times to see if you were coming down, but didn’t hear anything. And then I saw your grandma and she said you weren’t feeling well, so…”

_Thanks, Nana_. At least he seemed to feel every bit as awkward as she did. “Oh. I hadn’t looked at my phone in a while, but I’m not feeling super well.”

Harry frowned. “You were fine yesterday?”

The three of them spent hours in the water yesterday, floating on tubes until Harry kicked his legs under Kennedy’s tube and she freaked out, thinking it was a shark. Harry got a sick pleasure in rattling off the shark sightings each afternoon like they were lottery numbers. 

“I’m not _sick_ sick, I’m just having a bad day with -” she gestured at her chest. 

Comprehension finally dawned on him. “What happens when you have a bad day?” he asked quietly, like he was scared raising his voice above a whisper would send her into cardiac arrest. 

“Sometimes my lips turn blue.” Oh god, why did she say that? He exaggerated a grimace. “It’s kind of weird, but only happens if there’s an issue with my medicine.”

“That is…terrifying,” he said not unkindly. 

She nodded slowly. “But normally I just get kind of tired and need to take a day.”

He hummed thoughtfully. “So, you probably don’t want to go down to the beach?”

“Not today.”

They both spoke at the same time. 

“Well, I guess I’ll see you -”

“-We could hang out here then?”

He shoved his hands in his bathing suit pockets. “Oh, I mean, I can go if you want or we could hang out here if that’s cool? But like if you don’t want to, I get it -”

Cassandra briefly looked outside. It was a gorgeous day, not too hot, and there were puffy white clouds scattered in the sky, perfect for surfing or laying on the beach. So why did he want to sit inside with her and watch a movie?

“-I mean, if you want.” She adjusted her position on the couch so Harry could sit further down and she could still stretch out her legs. “Here, sit.”

He sat, albeit a little stiffly. “What’re we watching?” 

“ _The Parent Trap_. You want me to start it over?” 

It had always been one of her favorites, especially the camp scenes. She never could go to sleep away camp growing up, it would’ve been too difficult with her heart, so she liked to live a little vicariously through the movie.

“You don’t have to, I’ve seen it before. It’s one of Ken’s favorites. Hate the part with the ear piercing.”

She smiled. “You squeamish?”

He shrugged. “It’s gross, okay?” He elbowed her in the leg when her smile widened. “Shut up.”

They watched twenty or so minutes in relative, and only slightly awkward, silence when Harry spoke again. 

“So Kennedy’s going to field hockey camp on Monday. My dad’s bringing her back home tomorrow.”

“Oh? Are you going back with them?”

He shot her a look and threw his arm over the back of the sofa to get more comfortable. “To suburban Connecticut with my whole family when I could have a house to myself on the beach? Hard pass.”

“I don’t know, I thought you might’ve wanted to see people or something?”

“Would you?” he returned. Not really. “It’ll be nice, I never really get to be totally alone, there’s always someone around.”

Cassandra didn’t know the last time she was completely alone longer than a few hours and, further still, without the promise that someone was coming back in the near future. Would she get lonely if she was in his place? Would she be scared to live in that big house the Binghams had?

Their beach house always seemed cozy and inviting whenever Cassandra went over, but she always chalked that up to the people inside it. It was much larger than her grandparents’ house and was actually on the beach, to boot. 

Her grandparents’ house was tucked behind the Coopers’ house, but you could still see the ocean from the southern facing windows and the back deck, in addition to the widow’s walk. But the Bingham’s had one of those tall wooden staircases leading down to the beach and had a gorgeous wraparound porch and back patio facing the ocean. They were both classic shingle style, but the Bingham’s house was easily twice the size of the Walker’s and had twice as many bedrooms. It didn’t seem like they used half of them, but they were still there. 

Picturing Harry all alone in that big house made her _sad_. He’d definitely be lonely, no matter how much he was looking forward to it now. 

“Nana will probably invite you over for dinner a couple times,” she said instead. 

Harry smiled wryly. “My dad already talked to her, told her to keep an eye on me.”

“Somebody has to…” She nudged him with her foot. 

He scoffed. “Excuse me, I’ve been on my best behavior lately.” Cassandra quirked an eyebrow. “I mean, I’ve been nice to _you_ …”

“You have,” she conceded. “It’s been disconcerting.”

“You’re not _that_ bad, I guess.”

Before Cassandra could respond, Nana came home with Cassandra’s lunch and even something for Harry, as well. The three of them ate in the living room while the movie wrapped up. Nana made sure to invite Harry over for dinner on Monday - _and really any other day next week, you know we love having you over_ \- before she went out to the garden and left them alone again. 

“You feeling any better?”

“A bit, actually, yeah.” And she was. She didn’t know if it was specifically talking with Harry or if it was just getting out of her normal pity party, but she had perked up a bit. Maybe it was the sandwich. 

“You want to go for a drive or something?” She must have looked a bit wary since he carried on, “Nowhere too far, just get out of the house for a bit.”

“Maybe…”

“I’ll let you play DJ…” She smiled. “See? Come on, Cass.”

She couldn’t say no now, not when he was smiling at her like that. “Fine, just give me a few minutes to get ready.”

“I’ll meet you out front in ten.” And like a light, he was off. 

She met him downstairs eight minutes later, wearing white linen shorts and a Yale t-shirt. A quick look in the mirror upstairs had her slightly embarrassed that he’d seen her looking like this, so she put her hair up in a ponytail and brought a baseball hat with her just in case.

“Ready?”

She nodded and got into the Wrangler. Today, he had the top off, but the doors were still on. It always scared Cassandra a bit when she saw it in the driveway sans doors. Once he told her that he sometimes drove to Wellfleet or Truro without them and she almost had a heart attack. You couldn’t drive terribly fast on Route 6 - 55 mph max - but she wouldn’t put it past Harry to push that a bit too much. Merely going down the street to get ice cream once sans doors had been enough for her. 

Once they backed out of the driveway and were making their way to the main road, Harry handed her his phone. “Your prize.”

“Thank you,” she said solemnly. 

They took Route 28 towards Keegan Beach and Chatham Light and slowly inched their way through downtown. Cassandra got far too much joy in playing DJ and snooping through Harry’s playlists. Like she figured, he had an obscene amount of Frank Ocean and Vampire Weekend songs, mixed in with your typical pregame hits and 60s and 70s Laurel Canyon standards. He only vetoed two songs she picked, which she didn’t take too personally.

They had to circle around the small beach parking area twice until the found a spot, which Harry kind of stole from a huge Suburban with one of those family stickers on the back windshield. The dad looked pretty pissed, but Harry just offered him a shrug and an overly cheerful smile. Once they parked, they made their way down the path to the beach and idly walked in silence before Harry spoke. 

“Listen, I wanted to apologize about the election. And I know it was like weeks ago now, but I really don’t think people only voted for you because they felt bad about your heart. That was shitty of me.”

Cassandra nodded thoughtfully. “Thanks. It was pretty shitty of you.” Harry snorted. “But it only bugged me because I kind of thought something similar.”

“Still, I’ve felt bad about it since we’ve started hanging out and become - well - friends.” He looked so uncomfortable that she almost felt as though she should apologize to him. “I mean, I should thank you - for winning, that is. You saved me from a lot of work next year. If I was student council president then maybe I would have only been able to take _four_ APs…”

“Shut up,” she laughed. He smiled. “Thanks for taking me out this afternoon, I was really _prudent_ of you.” 

They started using SAT words in their banter last fall after one of Cassandra’s tutoring sessions ran into Harry’s. He couldn’t get over how _serendipitous_ their meeting was, especially after Cassandra professed earlier during debate practice that anyone who needed an SAT tutor had surely scored below 1300 on their first practice test. And it just stuck.

He shrugged. “If you’re all laid up inside, who else am I gonna complain about? All my material will be gone.” She lightly shoved his shoulder. “Hey now, you only did that because I can’t do anything back, I’d never attack an _invalid_.”

She smiled sweetly. That was exactly why she pushed him. 

“Alright, fine,” he said far too nonchalantly. 

Her guard was up, but not enough. They continued walking side by side until Harry darted a hand out and snatched the baseball hat right off her head. Before she could reprimand him, he ran ahead and placed it on his own head, backwards. 

Why did boys always look so much better with baseball hats on backwards? He turned around, a gleeful smile on his face, taunting her. 

“Harry!” She went to run after him, but he held his hands up and she froze at the unexpected action.

“Woah, killer. Didn’t you just have a mild heart episode that forced me to keep couch-side vigil while you watched an admittedly fucked up kid’s movie?”

“ _The Parent Trap_ is not _that_ fucked up, okay? Just give me my hat back.” He shook his head. “I’m gonna get burned, I didn’t put sunscreen on before we left.”

He made a face, but did start walking towards her. “You’ve been _exposed_ for like a minute and it’s like almost five o’clock. You’ll be fine.”

“I freckle easily,” she smarted. 

He was a few feet away now. “They look cute, though.”

See now he was just fucking with her. “And you look ridiculous.” He reached back to pick the hat up by the brim and threw it at her. “Thanks.”

He fell in line next to her again and they continued walking back towards the car. “You’ve been very - _testy_.”

“Testy?” Weak.

“You’ve been kind of mean to me - if we’re being honest - and I think I’ve been particularly _amenable_ today.”

“Well,” she stretched out, “how about we get ice cream, my treat? Like a thank you?”

He smiled. “Really now?”

“Yup. And I won’t even make fun of you for getting that disgusting mint chocolate chip shit you always order.”

“You just did.”

“Oops.”

“Hmm,” Harry appeared thoughtful. “What if I promised to get another flavor? Might even let you pick it for me?”

She scrunched up her nose. “There’s definitely a catch.”

“See I knew you were smart. You’ll owe me,” he said. 

They made their way back up towards the car, trying to navigate their way through the Saturday evening crush of families trying to take their Christmas card pictures on the beach. There were far too many fathers and sons in navy chino shorts and white button downs and mothers and daughters in Lilly Pulitzer dresses. 

“I’ll owe you?” she asked as she got back into the Jeep. 

The car purred to life beneath them. “Yup, you’ll owe me.”

“Aren’t I the one doing you the favor and paying for your ice cream?”

Harry looked both ways before pulling out of their parking spot. “Well yes, but you could pick some truly disgusting flavor for me and I’ll have no choice but to eat it.”

Once they got out of the heavy flow of traffic, Cassandra held her hand out for his phone, which was begrudgingly passed over. 

“I wouldn’t purposely pick something you’d hate, but I do think you need to branch out a bit. My grandpa likes more adventurous flavors than you do.”

“He wants to take me golfing next week,” he said instead. 

Cassandra turned in her seat to face him as a Vampire Weekend song came on the speakers. “Really?” Her grandpa never offered to take her golfing.

Harry nodded, but kept looking at the road. “Don’t really golf, though.”

“But that’s like all you guys talk about when you come over?”

“I like to watch golf, yes,” he conceded, “but that doesn’t mean I know how to play. I mean, I am a pro at mini golf, so I think I could handle putting pretty well. But I don’t think I could drive for shit.”

She tried not to sound too bothered. “Well, at least you got invited. He won’t even invite me along to drive in the cart with him.”

“Can you even drive? Seems like I’m the only one carting us around.” She glared at him. “I can ask him if you can come? We’re supposed to go Thursday or Friday, I think.”

“Maybe. My schedule might be booked up by then though,” she said lightly. 

They were nearing downtown now and Cassandra was scrolling through his Spotify, looking for the Kendrick Lamar song Harry requested earlier, when a notification flashed across the top of his screen. She knew she should have just slid it away, but the name made her pause. 

_Kelly 💙: I miss you, are you still coming back next week?_

Her stomach dropped and she slid the notification away. The bass thumped needlessly in the background, but all she could focus on was the text: _I miss you_. 

The phone felt heavy in her hand. She didn’t know why it bugged her so much that they still texted. They had to do it pretty regularly too if Kelly knew Harry might have come back next week. 

Were they just on a break then? Did they not truly break up? The probability that they cut off all communication was pretty slim. Harry never really mentioned her, but Kelly’s presence had been weighing pretty heavily on Cassandra’s mind lately. And the blue heart, what was up with that? She just barely stopped herself from checking to see how Harry saved her own contact. 

Kelly Aldrich, who was one of the sweetest and prettiest girls in West Ham. Kelly, who didn’t fight with the boy next to her for the best grade for the past four years. Kelly, who everybody liked and never made fun of for trying too hard. Kelly, whose ex-boyfriend or boyfriend - _whatever_ \- Cassandra was definitely starting to like _in that way_. 

“Umm, do you think we could head back now?” she said quietly.

They were stopped at a red light so Harry looked over at her and frowned. “Err sure. You don’t want ice cream anymore?” 

She shook her head. “Sorry, rain check?”

“You feeling okay?”

God why did he actually have to sound worried? Or like he gave a shit? She angled herself towards the door and away from the center console. 

“Just tired,” she said, “maybe we shouldn’t have gone out.” In more ways than one. 

He nodded slowly. “Okay, I mean, yeah it’s getting late anyway.” 

It wasn’t, but she didn’t fight him on it and they made their way home. 

——-

The next day, Sunday, Cassandra popped by the Bingham’s to say goodbye to Kennedy and wish her well at camp. She’d be back in a week or so, but Cassandra would miss her, especially after how awkward things were between her and Harry after their drive yesterday. She was a good buffer most days, if not a little excitable. 

As she was talking with Mr. Bingham and Kennedy in the foyer, she could see him talking on the phone in the backyard, pacing back and forth between the cornhole boards. He looked _tired_. Who could he have been talking to? His mom? Kelly?

“Make sure you thank your grandparents again for keeping an eye on him,” Mr. Bingham said, acknowledging Harry in the backyard. “We’ll have to have you all over after we get back as a thank you - or maybe we’ll even go out.”

She smiled. “Sounds good, I’ll let them know. And have fun at camp,” she finished, turning to Kennedy.

The younger girl grumbled. “I won’t. Nine to four everyday? And it’s going to be in the nineties all week - the nineties! I can feel the heat stroke coming on already.”

“I’m sure you’ll survive, be ready in five. And see you later, Cassandra,” Mr. Bingham said before leaving them be.

“I always wanted to play field hockey,” Cassandra said.

Kennedy groaned. “You’re not missing anything, trust me. The kilts, the running - bleh! I’d much rather be with you and Harry here at the house. Though I bet Harry will be happy.” 

The confusion must’ve been written across her face because Kennedy elaborated. “All alone with _Cassandra_ ,” she said in a relatively good Harry impression. “It’s almost worse hearing about you now than when he hated you.”

She blushed. “I’m sure he doesn’t -”

Kennedy‘s smile looked every bit like her brother’s when he was trying to get out of trouble. “Have fun.”

Cassandra just shook her and headed towards the side door. “Don’t get heat stroke,” she called out.

“Use protection!” She heard before the door shut behind her.

Maybe the week away from Kennedy and her antics wouldn’t be a bad thing.

——-

Two days later, Cassandra was waiting around for her five-o-five call from Allie, signaling her sister had gotten off for her bi-weekly night off. She accepted the FaceTime call and propped her phone up against a bowl of decorative lemons on the kitchen counter. 

“Hey!” Allie’s slightly blurry face came into view. 

“Hey, how’re you?”

“Tired,” Allie grumbled. “I have the 11-12 year olds this week. I think they’re worse than the 13-14 year olds.”

Cassandra laughed, having some experience, herself, with pesky thirteen year olds as of late. “Where’re you going tonight?”

The view on the phone changed to Allie walking. “Headed to Maddie’s house, she’s getting the car. I’m _dying_ to watch tv and have ice in my drink.” Cassandra chuckled. “Plus she might have some guys over from the boys’ camp, too.”

“Hmmm fancy,” she teased. “Anyone in particular?”

Allie smiled widely. “I’ll let you know.” She looked back down at her phone and scrunched her nose. “You look really tan, lots of freckles.”

Cassandra blushed. “Oh, really? Been at the beach a lot,” she paused and looked around the kitchen to see if Nana was lurking around anywhere. “Actually, there’s this _guy_ I’ve been hanging out with -”

The phone jostled on Allie’s end. “- Oh my god, tell me everything!”

“There’s not a lot to tell…” 

“What’s his name? What’s he look like? Send me a picture?”

Cassandra bit her lip. “Err his name? His name - is James?” she said referring to Harry’s middle name. “And he doesn’t really do social media, so I don’t have any pictures.”

“Booooo, lame. Is he hot?” She sounded giddy. “He must be, you’re all red.”

Shit. “Y-yeah, he’s cute.” An understatement. “He’s like my height and has brown hair and it always looks super messy? Like he just ran his hands through it. He surfs, too, which is completely ridiculous, but kind of cool? And he’s - he’s sweet even if he is kind of an idiot sometimes - but we’re just friends. Like whenever we get ice cream or go to the beach, his sister is always with us, so like he definitely doesn’t like me like that and like I don’t like him like that, so I don’t know what I’m telling you about him for-”

_Shut up, shut up, shut up_. It was quiet on the other end of the line.

“Alright,” Allie said finally, “I was expecting a simple _yeah, he’s hot_ and you gave me all _that_. Soooo, how’d you guys meet?” 

Kindergarten, Mrs. Pollard’s class. They sat next to each other for the first month of school and shared a box of crayons. Harry had the fancy one with the sharpener in the back. 

“Uhh his parents have a house down the street, right on the beach,” she said instead. “We met up on the beach a few weeks ago.”

“ _A few weeks ago!_ Have you guys hooked up yet?”

“N-no, we haven’t,” she stammered. 

Allie just smiled. “Not _yet_.”

“Not ever,” she returned. “He has a girlfriend - or they broke up or are on a break or something. She texted him the other day - I don’t want to ask.”

“Ask! You could be hooking up with some rich Cape boy instead of yammering on the phone with me.”

“How do you know he’s rich?” Cassandra asked shrewdly. 

Allie rolled her eyes. “His parents have a house on the beach in Chatham and his name is James, of course he’s rich. Wait, do Nana and Grandpa like him?”

“Yeah, he’s been over for dinner a couple times -”

“- Holy shit. Should I reserve the church? Pick out the China pattern? Put Nana on, she’ll give me the tea.”

Cassandra craned her neck to see if Nana was still outside. “Ahhh bummer she’s not around at the moment.”

“Lame,” Allie stretched the word out, “I’ll get her next time - shit, I have to go, Maddie’s here. But try and sneak a pic of Cape boy for me, please and thank you!”

“Don’t hold your breath.”

“Love you!”

Cassandra sighed, but smiled. “Love you, too. Bye!”

The FaceTime call cut out and she stared blankly at her lock screen. She’d changed it to a photo of her and her grandparents that Harry took the other night. The three of them looked beyond happy and she smiled every time she looked at her phone. The summer was shaping up to be one of her favorites in recent memory, a large part in thanks for her grandparents, of course, but also the family down the street. 

Her stomach grumbled, reminding her that dinner was approaching soon and that she hadn’t had lunch that day. Instead, her and Nana had a late breakfast-slash-brunch around eleven thirty on their way to Hyannis to look at some chairs for the family room. It was nearing five thirty now and she figured she’d go out to the yard and check in with Nana on dinner. 

The backyard was shrouded in shade at this time of day and Cassandra was struck at how gorgeous the flowers that they’d planted a few weeks ago looked in the late afternoon light. Seemingly in the midst of it all, Nana sat happily at the wrought iron patio set in the far corner of the lawn by the Coopers’ house, nursing a glass of wine and reading her book. 

“Nana?” Cassandra asked once she got closer. 

She looked up from her book. “Hey sweet pea, have a seat. You hungry for dinner soon?”

“Yeah, in a little bit. Grandpa isn’t back yet.” She adjusted her denim skirt before sliding into the chair.

“He’s been spending too much time on the 19th hole lately,” Nana said wryly. Cassandra didn’t even chuckle. “You alright, feeling okay?”

She nodded. “Yeah, yeah. Just - Allie called - sorry I didn’t come out to get you, she just distracted me.”

“What’s she up to?” Cassandra told her about Allie’s new campers and what she had planned for her night off. Nana laughed at all the right parts and asked for additional details where appropriate. “What distracted you?”

Cassandra sighed. “I told her about Harry - us hanging out and stuff. But I didn’t say it was _Harry_. I kind of said it was some other guy and she got the wrong idea and - you won’t say anything about Harry to Allie, will you?” Nana frowned slightly. “I just know she’ll make a big deal about it and I don’t really want to explain it all - I don’t know.”

“Why would she make a big deal about you being friends?”

She slumped her shoulders. _Because I used to have a crush on him for two years and I kind of overcompensated and hate him now, so she’ll never let me live this down_. 

“We don’t really get along at school - like at all. Fighting over grades and stuff like that. And I don’t - I don’t know if Harry wants anyone to know we’re friends now or whatever.”

Nana smiled softly. “I see. I haven’t known him as long as you have, but from what I’ve seen, especially last night at dinner, the boy likes being friends with you, Cassie.”

She worried her lip and thought about last night at dinner. Her grandpa made fajitas and they had s’mores over the firepit for dessert. Harry liked the burnt ones and got all her castoffs in her pursuit of the perfect golden marshmallow. 

When her grandparents chose to turn in for the night, Cassandra joked that it was her turn to walk him back since he always walked her home after a late night watching Netflix. But when they got to Harry’s house, he said he couldn’t let her walk back alone and that Cassandra could either stay at his house or he could walk her back. So he walked her back. It was so stupid and sweet and - _Harry_. 

They had been talking about the book he was reading, some 20th century _Great American Novel_ type thing that he started earlier that day - not Hemingway or Fitzgerald, but she wouldn’t put it past him to dabble in that literary subset for fun. His dad was an avid reader, especially as of late, and had a huge collection of books at their house in West Ham, but the Cape house was mainly filled with beach reads, baring a choice few _serious_ books. Cassandra had felt as though they read enough of those types of books at school to be put off from reading them over the summer, but Harry had kept insisting she’d like it and could borrow it when he was done. 

They had finished up their now extended walk and were back at the Walker’s house. Normally, he’d leave her at the end of the driveway and wait there until she got inside, but last night he had walked her right up to the front door. 

“I had a really nice time tonight,” he’d said. “Could’ve been all the sugar you piled me with, though.”

She’d giggled - _giggled_. “I’ll keep that in mind for next time.”

“I’d like that.” 

They had been speaking nonsense at that point, but it didn’t matter because his eyes had gotten soft and he had been looking at her so fondly that Cassandra had wished she had a camera to capture the expression on his face. He had licked his lips and leaned in slightly and then a twig or something snapped in the distance and she had pulled back in surprise.

He had exhaled and smiled like he knew something she didn’t. “Night, Cass.”

He had still waited until she was inside to head home, but Cassandra had wanted to run after him and ask what the hell just happened? She had trouble falling asleep and kept replaying the moment in her head. Was he going to kiss her? Did he like _her_? Was he just bored? Or worse, was he lonely?

They didn’t really talk much during the day, which only made Cassandra think the twinkle in his eye when he dropped her off was just a trick of the light. He sent her a couple memes on Instagram and some Tik Toks, but that was it. Nothing about hanging out or doing anything together. And then Allie called. 

“Why don’t you go over and talk to him?” Nana broke through her reverie. “Make plans just the two of you? No Kennedy, no grandparents. Just the two of you and talk it over? Clear the air.”

“Maybe,” she said noncommittally. 

“Not _maybe_. Go over now before your grandfather comes home for dinner.”

“Do you need any help with dinner?” she asked casually, trying to put off going over. 

Nana smiled. “Yes, but the salad can wait a few minutes.”

“Fine.” She got up and fixed her top and skirt again, trying not to notice how Nana looked entirely too pleased. 

“While you’re gone, I’m going to call your grandfather to get his ass home. It’s only Tuesday and this is already his third day at the course this week.”

This time Cassandra did laugh. Her grandpa was an avid golfer down in Florida, too, but at least there her Nana had a slew of friends to keep her busy during the day. Here she was still trying to find her own group. 

“My bones are eating away at each other,” she teased. 

Nana smiled. “I’m going to use that. Alright, off you go.” She waved her hand and Cassandra abided. 

The walk wasn’t long to the Bingham’s house and was one Cassandra had completed many times in the past few weeks - though normally with Harry or Kennedy trailing after her. 

With a quick fluff of her hair, she strode down the gravel driveway and pressed on through the gate on the side yard to the back patio. She could hear Harry talking to someone and moved to double back and return later, Nana and her judgemental looks be damned, until she realized he was just on the phone. 

He was sitting at the patio table with his feet stretched out on the chair in front of him and had his head tipped back up towards the sky. A couple of beer cans and his juul and Ray Bans littered the table, as well as a book cracked at the spine and flipped page down. It must have been the one he was talking about last night. He looked to be almost done with it - maybe he’d let her borrow it. 

Cassandra stood frozen on the walkway for a few moments, just taking in the scene. He was just _sitting there_ , talking on the phone and she didn’t think she’d ever found him more attractive and endearing and _shit_ \- she really liked him. 

Like I just want to make out in your car, hold your hand on the beach, liked him. 

“...Yeah, tomorrow sounds good...Low tide’s early, right...Cool and yeah, thinking of having everyone over around nine…Alright man, see you tomorrow.” 

He hung up and threw his phone down on the table and tilted his head back to take a pull from his juul. 

“Are you having a party?” Cassandra piped in, deciding to make her presence known and maybe scare him a bit if she was lucky. 

Harry startled and jerked his feet on the ground, but smiled. “Jesus Christ, Cass.” 

“Sorry,” she said sheepishly as she finally made her way up the steps. “You’re having a party?” 

“Yeah and I’m even inviting you,” he teased. 

Cassandra rolled her eyes, but still moved to sit down in the chair across from him. “I’m just surprised you know enough people here to invite considering I’m the only person you hang out with on a regular basis.”

Harry frowned, clearly put out, and took another pull from his juul. He blew the vapor towards her face and Cassandra watched, transfixed. It was hot, okay? Even if prolonged use would probably kill him. 

“I hang out with Kennedy.”

She shook herself. “She’s 13-”

“- And, of course, we can’t forget nana and grandpa.” That coaxed a smile out of her. “You think they’d come?”

“Probably not, but I can still ask.” He smiled. “Seriously though, how do you know that many people around here?”

Harry shrugged and took a sip of his beer. Clearly he was taking advantage of the empty house and fully stocked fridge. “I’ve come here every summer since I was a kid. I know plenty of people, doesn’t mean I want to hang out with them all the time.”

Fair point. “And why would I, when I can spend everyday with my _best friend_ from West Ham High, Cassandra Pressman?”

He shook his can a little bit, silently asking her if she wanted a sip. She shook her head. If she was going to have alcohol, it wasn’t going to be a shitty Narragansett that consisted mainly of Harry’s backwash at this point. 

“So tomorrow? Nine o’clock?”

“Let’s say nine fifteen, but only because we both know you would’ve shown up at eight thirty.”

True. “Can I bring anything?”

He shook his head. “No, but let me know if you want something to drink? I know you’re not really supposed to with,” he gestured at her chest, “but I can get you White Claws or something.” 

That was - surprisingly considerate for Harry. “Sure, thanks.” He smiled at her. “What?”

“I knew I could corrupt you.” Cassandra reached underneath the table and kicked his chair. “Hey!”

“I think you’re forgetting I live with Allie.”

“Wouldn’t forget that…”

Cassandra frowned. This wasn’t the first time he had said something vaguely _suggestive_ about Allie. And it wasn’t the first time Cassandra felt _small_ when he said it. It particularly hit a nerve after their conversation earlier that evening. 

“Why do you always do that?” The question came out before she could think better of it. 

“Do what?” he asked lazily, chasing a droplet of condensation down his can with his finger. 

“Whenever I mention Allie, you make it all - I don’t know, do you like her or something?” She hated how her voice came out quiet. 

His head snapped up to look at her and she colored. “What? No.”

Because that didn’t sound suspicious at all. She should’ve known, everyone always preferred Allie to Cassandra. She was a bit like Kelly, actually. Allie was bubbly and fun and Cassandra - well, she just wasn’t. 

Instead she just smiled sadly and looked down at the table. “Shouldn’t have asked.”

“No, I don’t - trust me Cass, I don’t have a thing for your sister.”

She looked up. “Why not? Allie’s great.”

“Jesus, I can’t do anything right.” He ran a hand through his hair. “I do not have a thing for your sister. I’m sure she’s great, but I don’t have a thing for her. And I don’t know why I always do that, probably because I know it bothers you.”

Which was true, but it was silly to be so bothered by it, wasn’t it? Even if Harry didn’t like Allie, he probably didn’t like Cassandra. Maybe last night was a fluke. 

Suddenly, the back terrace felt too small, too intimate. Her chair screeched on the slate with how quickly she got up and she started down the steps towards the backyard, saying:

“So, I’ll see you at the party tomorrow-”

He followed her down the steps. “- Wait, you never said why you came over?” 

Not expecting him to be right behind her when she turned around, Cassandra stumbled back. The look on his face was hard to decipher, but he couldn’t have been upset that she was leaving so quickly. 

“It’s not important, just figured I’d see if you wanted to hang out tomorrow, but if you already have plans then…”

While Cassandra moved to step back, Harry shifted closer. “Oh. I was thinking of going to Wellfleet tomorrow, go surfing at Marconi. But you can come - I mean if you want? You could meet some of my _friends_ , which I definitely have…” 

“I don’t know how to surf - and don’t say you’ll teach me,” she said before the words could get past his lips. He quirked an eyebrow. “I’ll watch,” she said eventually. 

A smile crept across his face. “I bet you will-”

“- Shut up.” She shoved his shoulder. 

“I’ll buy you lunch, though I’m pretty sure you still owe me an ice cream from the other day?”

She pretended to consider this. “Fine. What time?”

Harry checked his phone like they’d leave right now. “Low tide’s around ten thirty, but I wanna make sure I get some time in and a parking spot, so let’s do seven thirty?”

“Seven thirty?” she whined. Way too early, she’d have to get up by seven at the latest. 

He nodded, clearly getting some enjoyment out of her misery. “It’s at least half an hour, forty minutes to get there and I want to actually surf before low tide. Plus, you can bring all that summer reading you’ve been bitching about.”

“True, I’ll already be bored out of my mind watching you surf, _Owen Meany_ should be a nice break.”

He rolled his eyes before his posture suddenly changed. Slowly, as if not to scare her off, he brought his hand up to her face and ran his thumb over her cheekbone. “And don’t forget an umbrella, looks like you’re getting some freckles.” 

God, it would’ve been so easy for him to pull her closer. Just slide his hand through her hair and pull her closer and kiss her like he almost did last night. 

“Right. I’ll see you tomorrow then?” She hoped she wasn’t blushing. 

He cleared his throat and dropped his hand. “Yeah, yeah. Seven thirty, don’t be late.”

Tomorrow. She’d talk to him about it tomorrow.

——-

Harry was not what Cassandra would typically consider _athletic_. Like they were routinely in _plays_ together for Christ’s sake - Shakespearian plays. 

And while he was friends with all the football and lacrosse guys, he was more comfortable leading the spirit section, two water bottles full of vodka and Gatorade deep, beneath the Friday night lights than running around on a field for hours on end. So while she wouldn’t have classified him as _athletic_ , he probably wouldn’t have either. 

And as Cassandra had seen during the, now numerous, times they hung out at the beach, he wasn’t quite lanky but he wasn’t quite muscular either. He was _fit_.

But seeing him standing on the front seat of the Jeep, his arms resting on the top of the windshield, while he waited for her that morning almost caused a minor heart episode. 

She hadn’t been prepared - she hadn’t _known_. 

He was already wearing his wetsuit, but the top portion was rolled down to rest just above his hips, so that his chest would have been completely bare. But to keep the early morning chill out, he wore a soft grey hoodie that he left blissfully unzipped. He stopped idly tapping out a beat on the top of the windshield when he saw her approach. 

“You’re late,” he teased. He hopped out of the car to help her with her stuff, most of which her grandpa had already rested against the front porch the night before. 

“I had to wait for Nana to pack the cooler,” she said as she thrusted it against his chest. And she had to listen to her gush about Cassandra’s _outing_. The word was settled on after much debate that this was not a date. 

He let out an over exaggerated grunt as he heaved the cooler into the back. “I’ll have to have a word with her when we get back.”

They made quick work of packing up the car and Harry made her put some of his stuff in her beach bag so he wouldn’t have to carry his backpack. Once done, she wheeled around to the passenger side of the car. 

“Watch your head,” he said, referring to the surfboard affixed to the roof of the car that Cassandra narrowly missed bonking her head on. The Jeep hummed to life beneath them and they were off at seven thirty-four, just a few minutes late. 

From their little corner of Chatham, the drive to Wellfleet took about forty minutes and they spent it idly chatting, but mainly listening to Harry’s new Discover Weekly playlist. Route 6 was relatively deserted this early and the signs for the Coast Guard, Marconi, and Cahoon Hollow Beach parking lots along the National Seashore all confirmed there were still plenty of spots available. 

Regardless, Harry’s car already had an annual pass on it, so they didn’t have to pay. As they pulled up to the lot and got out of the car, Cassandra caught a glimpse at the beach below. It was settled at the bottom of a fairly tall dune, made accessible by two rather steep sets of stairs. 

“You’re really going to carry your surfboard down all those stairs?” she asked dubiously. It was a pretty long walk from the parking lot to the beach, regardless of where they happened to set up and the board looked heavy.

Harry poked around the side of the car and shrugged. “Yeah, I do it all the time, plus it’s not like you’ll be able to help me.”

The twin sets of wooden staircases leading down to the beach across the parking lot looked intimidating to Cassandra with just her gear - a chair, her bag, the cooler Nana packed with their breakfast and some drinks, and the umbrella Harry insisted she bring, to say nothing of the massive surfboard he was getting off the Wrangler. 

“You think you’ll be able to carry all your stuff down by yourself?” he asked in turn, after just having gotten the last of it out of the trunk. He left his own chair in the car, but Cassandra figured he’d come back for it later. 

“Yup,” she said crisply.

Harry frowned. “I can always come back up and get my board, it’s not a big deal.”

“I’ll be fine.” 

Thankfully, her chair had straps to put it on her back, while she carried her tote bag in one hand and the umbrella in the other. However, she did struggle with picking up the cooler and only made it about ten feet before she had to reposition. There was no way she’d make it across the rest of the parking lot, let alone down those stairs and across the beach. 

Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Harry leaning against the tailgate with his arms crossed over his chest, watching. She finally managed to get a decent grip on the cooler when the umbrella fell. 

“Fuck’s sake.” He jogged over to her and snatched the cooler from her hand and the umbrella from the ground. “You’re so fucking stubborn.”

With a glance back at the Wrangler, Cassandra had no choice but to follow him. If he wasn’t nervous about someone swiping his board from the car, then neither was she. They walked across the rest of the parking lot and down the stairs in relative silence. Harry led them to the right, where a cluster of guys was situated much further down the beach. 

After a few minutes, he put the cooler down about forty feet from the water and, without a word, threw his hoodie on the sand and started setting up the umbrella, taking care to make sure the corkscrew was firmly in the sand so the pole wouldn’t wobble in the wind. 

The beach was relatively quiet at such an early hour, most people wouldn’t show up until at least after ten. The quiet made Cassandra consider that they’d never actually gone through this sort of routine together before. One of them was always already at the beach when they saw each other. 

This felt deliberate, almost intimate, even. Their food was in the same cooler, they would use the same sunscreen, and Cassandra even had his wallet and phone in her bag. They had made a conscious effort to be together - _Harry_ had made a conscious effort to invite her along to watch him surf. 

Plus, watching his back muscles flex as he screwed the umbrella into the sand had her thinking about the time he asked her to put sunscreen on his back the other day and how warm and soft his skin felt underneath her hands.

“- All set, it’s not too windy, but you should still keep an eye on it.” He turned around and definitely saw her still staring at him. Oddly enough, he also blushed. 

“Thanks.”

He rubbed the back of his neck. “Right, I’m gonna get my board and then I’ll just head out. The guys are over there -” He pointed towards a group of five guys still about a hundred yards further down to the right. “- so I’ll just...”

“Got it, thanks again.” He smiled slightly in response and set off back across the beach and towards the stairs and parking lot. 

While he was gone, Cassandra got herself situated by moving the cooler into the shade, setting up her chair, and putting on some sunscreen. Harry barely hazarded a glance her way once he came back ten minutes later and met up with his friends. The wetsuit was fully zipped now. 

After they did that weird half hug thing guys do, Cassandra idly watched them talk for a few minutes before they all set off for the water, ultimately paddling further out beyond the breakwater and sitting on their boards. 

There was a decent breeze coming off the water, which was probably good for Harry and his friends, but unfortunate for Cassandra since she was freezing sitting in her bathing suit despite being in the early morning sun - screw Harry and his weird umbrella fixation. She hadn’t even considered being cold at the beach when she put on a t-shirt and jean shorts for a cover up that morning, but she wished she had a sweatshirt to keep her warm. 

_Or a hoodie_. 

The grey hoodie Harry had carelessly thrown in the sand taunted her. He wouldn’t mind, he wasn’t wearing it. And she was _so cold_ sitting just in her bathing suit. It really was the least he could do after dragging her out to Wellfleet at seven thirty in the morning. 

Before she could talk herself out of it, she got out of her chair and picked the offending hoodie off the ground and slipped it on, leaving it unzipped. She had to remind herself that the hoodie was warm from the sun and not any residual body heat from Harry, but it didn’t hurt that it smelled like him. Like his cologne and his cucumber flavored juul and just _him_. 

Content, she slipped into a casual routine of reading a few pages of her book and then watching the guys out in the water. At first, it was hard to tell them apart since they all looked so similar in their black wetsuits, but Cassandra quickly determined which one was Harry. She could just tell. 

They didn’t actually ride a wave that often, they mainly sat on their boards, paddled a bit, and talked from the looks of it. Harry got a couple waves and completely wiped out twice, which Cassandra found hilarious. It was oddly endearing to know he wasn’t good at everything. 

About an hour and a half later and after she managed to slog through about one hundred pages of her book for AP Lit, she decided to walk further down the beach where the boys were surfing. One of them had just ridden a wave in, but the others were still out there. 

Harry must have seen her making her way towards him and he half rode, half paddled into shore, echoes of his friends’ jeers coming with him. Cassandra put a hand up to her face to shield her eyes from the sun while she waited for him. 

“Cold?” he asked, dragging his eyes up and down her body, definitely taking note of her latest wardrobe addition. 

She shrugged. “It’s windy.”

“You want to come in?”

“Think I’m all set.” The words sounded oddly flirty coming out of her mouth. 

“The water’ll warm you right up.” He took a couple steps towards her as if to embrace her, read get her soaking wet. 

She drew her leg back to splash him instead and darted back to shore before he could mimic the action. He shook the water out of his hair. 

“How’s _Owen Meany_?” he asked. 

“Awful, don’t recommend it.” She took a couple tentative steps back toward him. 

“I was going to look up the SparkNotes anyway. So?” She shot him a questioning look. “How’d I do?” He looked boyish, like he actually cared what she thought. 

“Oh,” she let out a laugh, “okay, I think? You wiped out twice, which was funny. Is that a lot?”

He frowned and the surfboard he had been holding with his left hand suddenly slapped against the water. The nose bumped into her shin a couple times as the water lapped against her legs. 

“No,” he said shortly. 

“Your friends are pretty good, can’t really tell them apart, but they’re pretty good.” 

Harry looked at her blankly. “I’ll be sure to tell them.”

Further out, she could hear them talking and laughing. She felt self conscious knowing they were out there watching and fiddled with the ends of his hoodie sleeves before crossing her arms over her chest. 

“Right, well let me know when you want a snack or something. Nana packed breakfast sandwiches and fruit.”

“Fine, I’ll come over when I’m done,” he said, moody again. 

She gave a meek smile, which he didn’t return. Instead, he shook out his hair and ran both his hands through it before picking up his board and setting off without another word. She stood on the shore and watched him paddle all the way out, where he was welcomed by his friends, before she went back to her chair. 

——

“I’m gonna go change and bring my board back.” Cassandra startled slightly and opened her eyes to see Harry standing above her, outlined by the sun. She must have dozed off reading.

She stretched a bit in her chair and pointed to her left. “Your stuff’s in my bag.”

But he went straight for the cooler. “I’m fucking starving,” he said, digging through the cooler for the breakfast sandwich Nana made. “We can hang out here for a bit longer and then go for lunch,” he said between bites. 

Cassandra nodded. “That’s fine. Here.” She threw her bag by his feet, so that after he finished eating, he could change into his regular bathing suit. Today’s had a vaguely ridiculous pattern that would probably still look good on him. 

“Thanks.” 

He put the empty sandwich bag back into the cooler once he finished and let out a stretch. Cassandra found herself staring. He looked unfathomably attractive wearing the wetsuit, to say nothing of how his hair looked all wet and pushed back. She shifted in her chair. 

They made brief eye contact and Harry looked away. “Right, I’m gonna...”

She pointedly went back to her book, but said “Cool, cool. I’ll be here.”

He set off at a brisk pace and soon Cassandra was alone again. But not for long. 

She noticed one of the guys Harry was surfing with coming towards her. About twenty feet out, he asked:

“So you’re the girlfriend?”

Cassandra laughed awkwardly at the insinuation that this honestly gorgeous surfer friend of Harry’s just made. “Oh - no. I’m - I’m not the girlfriend. We just know each other from school back in Connecticut.”

He looked pleased with this information. “I see. So, not the girlfriend, I assume you’re still going to his party tonight?”

“It’s actually Cassandra,” she said wryly, “but yeah, planning on it.”

He smiled and she was again struck by how attractive he was. “Guess I’ll see you then, Cassandra.” 

And with a wave, he was gone and with a quiet _what the fuck_ to herself, Cassandra distractedly went back to her book. 

A few minutes later, she was interrupted _again_ by the sound of a beach chair hitting the ground. “What did you say to Jack?” 

She frowned and turned around to face Harry. Jack? He must have meant the blond. Belatedly, she realized she forgot to ask his name in return. 

“What? Nothing, why?” 

Shit, did she sound defensive? She felt her cheeks heat up, but hoped Harry would think she had sat out in the sun for too long.

He circled around to stand in front of her. “I don’t fucking know, I saw him when I was coming back down and he was all _Cassandra’s nice_ ,” he intoned. “It was _weird_.”

“Oh. I mentioned I would be at the party tonight, but that was pretty much it.”

She left out the part about him thinking she was Harry’s girlfriend. It felt too embarrassing - for her, that is. Harry would probably make some joke about how she _wished_ she was his girlfriend or something. But that was a privilege reserved for the Kelly Aldrichs’ of West Ham. And now that Cassandra knew they were still texting...

He sat in the sand with a huff even though he literally just brought down his beach chair. “He’s a piece of shit, just so you know. But he has a fake, so I have to put up with him.”

That explained it. She had been wondering how Harry was going to get enough alcohol for the party. “How old is he?”

“He just graduated, he’s going to Yale in the fall.” 

Cassandra nodded idly, but could totally see how he could pass for twenty one. Though Jack was only a year older than them, he didn’t look as _boyish_ as Harry did. Not that Cassandra thought there was anything wrong with how Harry looked, but - 

“- I’m sure you’ll have loads to talk about tonight.” He almost sounded snippy. Or maybe he was just tired. 

She shrugged. “I mean, I’ll definitely want to ask him what the application process was like and why he wanted to go there?”

“Oh.” He sounded surprised at her answer. “Yale?” She nodded. “You wanna go to Yale?”

West Ham was one of those places you didn’t actively broadcast where you were applying to college. It was an academically competitive high school and people weren’t above applying to certain schools just so another would have less of a chance at getting in. But Cassandra didn’t get that vibe from Harry today. It sounded like he actually cared.

“I’ve been thinking about it…” she settled on. 

Regardless of their tentative friendship, Harry didn’t need to know it was her first choice. In fact, it was her only choice. She was thinking of applying early action.

“Huh,” he said. “I can see that. What would you study?”

“Political science,” she said without hesitation. 

He chuckled and shook his head. “Should‘ve seen that coming. I bet law school, too?”

“Maybe…” she smiled back. 

She wanted him to share his college plans, but wasn’t sure how to ask. He shot her a look like he knew exactly what she was thinking. “My mom wants me to go to Cornell, it’s where she went. But my dad took me up for a tour over February break -”

“- Oh no,” Cassandra interrupted, already knowing where this was going.

“Yup, nothing like Ithaca in February to kill that dream real quick.”

She laughed. Cornell was never on her list for precisely that reason. “Well, where do _you_ want to go?”

He looked thoughtful. “You know, I don’t really know. I liked Dartmouth - my grandpa went there.”

“Not Harvard?”

“Nah, bunch of pricks. Hell, maybe I’ll keep an eye on you at Yale,” he teased. 

“Oh god,” she exaggerated a groan. “Is our high school hatred going to stem over to college, too?”

He shifted. “Is that what you think? That I hate you?” She didn’t say anything, but that seemed to be enough for Harry. “Fuck, I don’t hate you. I don’t always like you and I have a pretty shitty way of showing it, but I definitely don’t hate you, Cass. Especially now.”

Suddenly, he shrunk back. Like he couldn’t believe he revealed that much to her. Cassandra leaned forward in her chair, resting her arms on her kneecaps, and tried to catch his eye. 

“I don’t hate you either. You annoy the shit out of me, but I don’t hate you. Or at least I haven’t for a while. I was just being _hyperbolic_.” 

And possibly unselling it a bit since she suddenly had a massive crush on him again.

He snorted. “Alright, Madame President no need to get all mushy on me.”

She plowed on. “And I don’t think it would be the worst thing if we both went to Yale. Might be kind of nice, get away from everyone else.”

He smiled at her, almost bashfully. Suddenly, he stood up and held his hands out. “Alright, let’s go.”

She frowned, but he pulled her out of her chair, and she staggered a bit at the abrupt action. “But I don’t want to leave yet.”

“ _Go in the water_ , dummy.”

She shied away from him. “What - no, it’s cold.”

“It’s not cold, I was just in it for like two and a half hours.”

“Yeah, but you had a wetsuit on. This,” she gestured up and down her body, “does not compute.”

He failed to fight off a smile and crossed his arms over his chest. In the back of her mind, she recalled that she chose this particular bathing suit to wear today - the infamous red bathing suit from their first beach run-in - because she thought Harry would like it.

“It most certainly does not.”

Cassandra cocked out her hip and titled her head challengingly. “Really?” He just shrugged. “Fine.” 

She threw Harry’s hoodie in the sand to the tune of his wordless complaints and set off for the water. Who knew where this sudden burst of impulsivity was coming from, especially when she knew the water was going to be cool. 

Both of them quickly made it to the water, with Harry trailing slightly behind. Further down, there were a couple people mulling about, mainly kids who didn’t care about the 68 degree water temperature, but their part of the beach was still sparsely populated at eleven o’clock. 

Ultimately, Harry went in first and was able to find a path out that was relatively unobstructed with shells and rocks. Cassandra slowly waded in after him, trying to get used to the temperature. The waves were decently sized today and the water kept nipping at her waist. Further out, Harry dove under a couple waves before swimming back over. 

“It’s definitely cooler out here than at home,” she said referring to the water temperature. She still hadn’t gone deeper than mid-torso. 

“Different current,” he said. “That’s why the surfing’s better, too.” He made his way closer to her, so they were both waist deep. “So, where do you want to go for lunch-”

Cassandra suddenly yelped when she felt something brush against her. “- Oh my god, what was that?” 

She felt the water rippling around her legs again, but couldn’t see anything. That was the thing about the Cape, you couldn’t always see the bottom of the water like in Maine. 

“Harry, stop it.”

He looked at her blankly. “I’m not doing anything. It’s probably just a fish or something.”

_Or something_. It happened again and this time something properly slimy rubbed against her leg. She let out a yelp and before she knew it, she had jumped onto his back. 

He stood there, frozen for a moment before he tightened his hands around the backs of her thighs to get her better situated. His hands felt way too _good_. 

“You good, Cass?”

She hummed in response, but didn’t make any moves to get down. In fact, she tightened her arms around his neck and pressed herself further against his back. His skin was wet and cool from being in the water and he smelled like sunscreen and the salt water. 

“Not a word.” She could tell he was smiling without even seeing his face. 

“I didn’t say anything, you’re the one who literally jumped me…” 

She felt her cheeks get hot. “Well, I didn’t know what it was and they - they have all those shark signs in the parking lot and -”

He sighed and started wading towards the shore. “Shark’s not gonna come this close, Cass. I think you’re fine. If anything, they’ll go for the seals over there,” he said with a nod further down the beach. 

It didn’t make her feel better. 

“Alright, party’s over.” He bent down slightly when they were only a foot or so deep and Cassandra realized she was still hanging onto his back like a koala. Once her feet were firmly planted on the ground again, she untwined her arms from around his neck. 

“Th-thanks.”

They dried off wordlessly once they made their way back to their spot. She laughed when he finished towel drying his hair and saw it going in seventeen different directions. In response, he rolled his eyes and got a brush out of her bag to fix it. 

Cassandra liked his hair after he got out of the water. Her and Kennedy would normally tease him about how fluffy it got after he went swimming and it dried from the salt water, but the younger girl wasn’t around now. 

So she didn’t have to pretend to hate it. 

They both sat down in the sun to dry their bathing suits off a bit before heading out for lunch and spent the next half hour discussing _Owen Meany_ , after Harry asked her to give a brief summary since the likelihood that he would actually read it was pretty slim. 

Once they finished, it was just before noon and he suggested they head out and get lunch on the way home. Ultimately, they wound up back in Chatham at someplace on Shore Road that was definitely fancier than Cassandra was expecting, especially considering that they both had their bathing suits on and her bathing suit top had soaked through part of her shirt. But Harry seemed pretty familiar with the set up, he even knew where to park. 

She bet he went with his family a lot - the whole place screamed Karen Bingham. In fact, she was pretty sure one of the pictures they had hanging in the family room was taken on the lawn here. Don’t get her wrong, where their families’ houses were was very nice, but this side of Chatham was an entirely different breed. These were estates and _compounds_.

He put his hand on her lower back as they were shown to their table, like he didn’t even realize he was doing it and the whole time Cassandra just kept thinking that this felt distinctly like a date.

It felt like a date when Harry ordered some sort of bougie mocktail and she got a Diet Coke and when their lunch came he snuck fries off her plate, even though he got plenty with his lobster roll. Or when they talked about school and what play they hoped Mrs. Drennan would pick for the Senior Class Play that fall or where they thought everyone was planning on applying to college. 

It felt like a date and that wasn’t a bad thing all of a sudden. And it seemed like Harry felt the same way because he kept giving her this ridiculous smile like he couldn’t believe they were having lunch together on what should have been a fairly ordinary Wednesday afternoon in mid-August. 

When the check came - Harry paid - she was sad their day together was coming to an end. 

——

Harry dropped her off at her grandparents’ house around two-thirty with the promise of seeing her at the party later that night. He had to meet up with Jack for the liquor run and do some other stuff beforehand, but made a point of walking her to her door and profusely thanking her grandma for the _lovely sandwiches_. 

Once he left, Nana asked if Cassandra wouldn’t mind going to the store with her since she wanted to stock up on some bulky items and her grandpa was still golfing. It was already his third time this week and it was only Wednesday. After freshening up, they headed out to Harwich. 

Nana liked to eat pretty healthy, but Cassandra still managed to sneak some junk food in the cart for her and her grandpa, who shared her sweet tooth. They managed to check out and were headed home around an hour later. 

All the while, Nana peppered her with questions about her morning. Did she have a nice time? _Yes_. Was Harry a good surfer? _Sort-of_. How was her book? _Boring_. Did she like Marconi? _Yes, it was bigger than their little beach_. Where’d they go to lunch? _The Beach House_ , which got her an approving nod. What did she get? _Fish tacos_. What did Harry get? _A lobster roll_. And on and on...

“So, are you excited for tonight?”

Cassandra bristled. “I don’t know if I’m _excited_ , but it should be fun. Harry’s good at stuff like that.”

“Like what?” 

“Parties or people, I guess.” 

And it was true. She was always a bit jealous of how easy it seemed for him to get people on his side, but getting to know him better these past few weeks had given her an even better understanding of his character. Harry tried hard and he wanted people to like him just as much as Cassandra did. It gave her hope that they could be friends when they got back to school. Or if not friends, then maybe cordial acquaintances. 

Especially if she got over this stupid crush she had on him. 

Nana smiled knowingly. “He’s a nice boy.”

“When he wants to be,” Cassandra joked. “Don’t really know what to wear tonight, though,” she said absentmindedly. 

“Ask him.” 

“What? No, I’ll just wear shorts and a top or something.”

“Ask him,” Nana reiterated firmly. 

Cassandra got her phone out of her back pocket with a sigh. “Fine, I’ll ask him what _he’s_ wearing and then go from there.”

_What are you wearing?_

He texted back seconds later. 

_fuck’s sake, warn a guy. i’m in public_

Wait, what? What did that have to do with anything - oh.

_Hi - sorry, I mean for tonight what’s the vibe?_

_I don’t know what to wear_

_And shut up_

_i don’t know??? wear whatever you want. it’s a party cass, not a fucking student council meeting or anything_

_Forget I asked_

“He just said to wear whatever I want.”

Nana shook her head. “Boys never know those things. I thought you said he had a girlfriend?”

Cassandra startled. Major mood killer, Nana. “What? No, he doesn’t. They broke up when school got out. And we’re just - friends -”

“- I meant, I thought he _had_ a girlfriend. He should be used to these questions.”

“Oh.”

Nana continued on, clearly pleased she managed to rattle her otherwise level headed granddaughter. “But as long as you’re _just_ friends, who just happen to go on _friend outings_ all the time, then it shouldn’t matter what you wear, right? Where’s that feminism you kids are always sprouting on about?”

Apparently it was back in West Ham with the rest of her common sense. Her phone buzzed again, but she ignored it. 

“I don’t go to many parties, never really invited.” 

Harry never invited her in West Ham. And if Harry did something, everyone else followed suit. 

They pulled into the driveway and Cassandra got out to get the groceries from the trunk, while Nana honked the horn to get her grandpa outside for assistance after she saw his car in the driveway. 

“Wear that cute dress you ordered last week, he’ll like that.”

Cassandra spun around. “Nana!”

“What’s she doing now?” her grandpa asked, coming out the side door. 

“Nothing good,” Cassandra said with relative humor. 

They managed to get the groceries in quickly and Cassandra went to the living room to watch some TV while her grandparents got dinner ready. After settling on an old episode of _Friends_ , she pulled out her phone to scroll through Instagram and check her texts after initially forgetting about the notification she got in the car. 

_wear something different. see you tonight_

There wasn’t necessarily anything suggestive about the text, but she couldn’t help but blush as she read it. 

Hours later, she tried not to think about that while she got ready. _Liar_ , she totally stared at the message again for what felt like ten minutes after she got out of the shower and sat on her bed in her towel. What she needed was a pep talk - and not one from Nana. On the off chance that she could check her phone, she sent Allie a picture of her outfit that she laid out on her bed.

_Is this good for a party?_ It took a few minutes, but Allie texted back while Cassandra was doing her makeup. 

_HOT_

_YES_

_is this for neighbor boy???_

_Cape boy????_

_what are we calling him again??_

She snorted and flopped down on her bed.

_Cape boy works and yes, he’s having a party_

_Kind of nervous…_

_show up a little late_

_if he comes right over to you, he likes you_

_also needlessly touch him, guys like that_

_I’m not completely incompetent you know_

_it’s taken you weeks to figure out you liked the guy, so excuse me for doubting your flirting abilities_

_did you figure out if he’s still with the girlfriend??_

_No, but I have a feeling they’re broken up_

_Like officially_

_Hmmm make sure you’re positive before you do anything_

_I’m not gonna ‘do’ anything_

_cassandra…_

_most guys’ love language isn’t fighting with you about DBQs in APUSH or who got a better quiz grade_

_you actually have to put some effort into things_

_and for fuck’s sake get a picture of him!_

_my entire cabin of 11-12 year olds moves on boys faster than you do_

Okay, so Allie would not be getting a picture of him after that comment. Hit a little too close to the vest.

_Anyways...will text you later_

_my 11-12 year olds wait with baited breath_

—-

To make a point or whatever, Cassandra showed up at Harry’s at nine-twenty. 

And to make a point or whatever, Harry excused himself from the two guys he was talking to and made his way over to her the second her sandals hit the back patio. 

“Hey, I was getting worried you wouldn’t show.” He looked legitimately happy to see her and she was sure she had a similar look on her face.

“And miss what might be one of my only chances to go to one of Harry Bingham’s parties? I don’t think so.”

He let out a little huff. “Clearly this is a trial run. Do you want something to drink? And I can introduce you to everyone?” He looked around the patio and lawn and then leaned in closer to whisper, “or well almost everyone. I don’t know who some of these people are.”

They made their way inside to the kitchen to get her a drink. Since the weather was so nice, there weren’t too many people inside, only about four people, but Harry still introduced her to each of them, saying she was his friend from West Ham. 

After some small talk, the little group went back outside, leaving the two of them alone, standing closely together by the island. “So uhh - you wanted a drink?”

Harry quickly walked over to the fridge once she nodded. “I’ll let you pick,” she said. 

She could hear him rifling around, clearly looking for something in particular. 

“You look good,” he said with his back to her and head still stuck in the fridge. 

“Oh, thanks.” She looked down self consciously, but was glad she made the decision to wear the dress. Thankfully, the other girls at the party were wearing something similar. It wasn’t something she normally would’ve worn; a little girly, a little flirty and very much open backed. But she took it as an excuse to wear something _different_. 

Before he turned around, she similarly took in his dark jeans that he slightly rolled at the ankles and navy t-shirt. The boat shoes were still around, but Cassandra didn’t mind them so much anymore. 

“I see you wore your good t-shirt for the occasion.” It wasn’t exactly a dig, the navy t-shirt did look really soft and knowing Harry, it was probably expensive. 

He turned around and slid her a Black Cherry White Claw across the island. “Don’t worry, I’ve got a stray button down around here somewhere.”

She cracked the can open and toasted him. “Thanks.” She took a sip. “It’s good.”

“There’s more in there if you want some, they’re behind the almond milk.”

She didn’t notice if he had a drink on the patio earlier, but didn’t see one now either. “What’re you drinking?”

“Beer, for now. I’m not really in the mood that much. Come on, let’s go back outside.” Like he did at lunch earlier, Harry placed a hand on the small of her back and guided her to the back of the house towards the patio. 

Someone by the beer pong table called out to him and they both made their way over. Cassandra leant against the porch railing, while Harry stood perpendicular to her and rested his hand on the same railing. While they waited for the current game to finish, Harry leaned in close and quietly offered her amusing tidbits on certain people at the party: _Katie Duvall got a nose job last January, much improved if you ask me; Josh and Ava Sullivan’s dad owned all the Cumberland Farms in Eastern Mass; Rory Dudeck got a DUI last week in Truro, but his dad’s the Barnstable County DA, so he’s not too pressed_.

All to which Cassandra had to say _fucking rich kids_. Harry laughed and promised her he’d never get a DUI if she promised never to get a nose job, which seemed like a pretty reasonable ask to her. Then he got pulled into the next game, but not before asking her if she wanted to be his partner. 

“You probably want to win, so I think I’ll sit this one out.” He made a silly face. “I’ll watch, though.”

Instead, he played with some kid named Zach, that Harry just told her got kicked out of Andover earlier that year for hazing some freshman on the soccer team. And while Harry was better at beer pong than he was at surfing, Cassandra still found herself a bit bored. 

She looked around the back patio, desperate for a familiar face to talk to, and made eye contact with Carly Cooper, whose family had a house next to her grandparents. The two girls didn’t hang out that often since Carly was a little older at nineteen and currently a counselor at Kennedy’s sailing camp, but Cassandra always thought she was nice and waved her over. 

After chatting about Carly’s freshman year at UVM, exchanging Instagram handles, and briefly popping back inside briefly to get a second drink, the girls soon moved onto other topics. They were currently talking about how Carly’s boyfriend from college, Peter, was coming down next weekend, when she asked Cassandra how long she and Harry had been together.

Cassandra’s eyes subconsciously drifted over to the beer pong table, worried he’d heard. “Err, we’re not - we’re not together. We actually -” she cut herself off to let out a brief laugh, “we don’t really get along at school.

Carly raised her eyebrows in surprise and held her hands up. “Okay, wow. Sorry, I just figured. I mean, I don’t know Harry that well, but I kind of assumed. I see you guys on the beach together like all the time.”

“Nope.” Cassandra took a sip of her drink and practically slammed the empty can down on the railing. “We’re just friends.”

“You should go for it.” Cassandra must have looked dubious since Carly continued. “Seriously! Like you guys actually have the ability to do something about it once summer’s over. Trust me, the last two weeks of August are always a shit show of heartbreak around here, it’s like a Turkey Drop.”

What in God’s name? “A Turkey Drop?”

“You know, freshman year like when everyone breaks up with their long distance high school boyfriend over Thanksgiving break?”

“Never heard that one before.” Cassandra chuckled. 

Carly shrugged and took a sip of her drink. “That’s how I broke up with mine and got together with Peter.”

“Really?”

“Yup. We started out as _friends_ ,” she teased. 

Well, her and Harry definitely didn’t start out as friends. “I’ll keep you updated,” she said eventually. 

Carly nodded. “Good, now I’m off to find my friend. She texted me about some shit that went down at the _Squire_ last night and I need the deets. But let me know if you want to hang out, seriously! Camp’s winding down and I kind of just want to chill before school.”

“I think I’m going to get another drink anyway, but yeah I’ll text you.” And with a wave, Carly was off and Cassandra was alone. 

She didn’t really know if she wanted another drink, but said it to seem like she wasn’t just going to stand around by herself. At least it would give her something to do. The back patio was even more crowded now than when she got there over an hour ago and she had to brush past multiple people to get inside. She didn’t know where Harry was, last she’d seen him playing beer pong, but he must’ve left while she was talking to Carly. 

It was quiet and cool in the house because of course he still had the air conditioning on even though the screen doors were open. She crept into the kitchen and threw her empty can in the recycling, never mind that most of the empties found their way into the trash instead, if they even got that far. It went against everything in her, but she resisted the urge to clean up and throw away the red cups and cans littering the kitchen island and countertops. She may have liked Harry, but she wasn’t about to clean up his shit. 

The kitchen was pretty empty, but there were two girls sitting on the couch in the living room, who were very clearly going through something. Apparently, Caroline G hooked up with Emily B’s boyfriend at Nick’s party on Saturday and one of the girls on the couch saw and told Emily B and she didn’t believe her and now they were fighting. 

With a fond smile, Cassandra let them be and snuck off to the bathroom. She got a couple bug bites outside earlier and knew the Binghams kept some hydrocortisone in the half bath downstairs. Thankfully, the cream was still in the top drawer and she put some on the spots on her leg before looking at herself in the mirror. It wasn’t particularly humid tonight, so her makeup held up so far, but she did fluff up her bangs a bit before going back to the kitchen and getting her long awaited third drink. 

She’d find Harry when she went back outside, even take him up on being his beer pong partner this time. She couldn’t be _that_ bad, right? Maybe he’d offer her some pointers. Stand behind her and position her arms just so. They’d win - their mutually competitive nature would ensure it - and he’d let out a whoop and give her a hug, lifting her slightly up off the ground, as they accepted their congratulations. Then she’d ask if he wanted to talk in private and he’d take her to some far corner of the yard or the house and Cassandra would run her hands up and down that impossibly soft t-shirt of his and finally kiss him. He’d back her up against a wall - because there had to be a wall - and say something incredibly hot while he peppered kisses up and down her neck -

She shook herself and opened the refrigerator, the cool air snapped her out of her ridiculous daydream. Clearly the last thing she needed was another drink if this was where her tipsy thoughts took her. 

“ _Cassandra_?” a deep voice, which unfortunately did not belong to Harry, said from behind her. 

She turned around tentatively, worried it was someone from West Ham, since she literally knew no one else at the party. But it just turned out to be Harry’s friend, Jack, from the beach. It was funny, she totally forgot he was going to be there tonight. Harry hadn’t told her any funny stories about him.

“Hey, how’re you?” Her cheeks felt hot, but probably not for the reason he was thinking. 

“Good, good.” He nodded. “You?”

She smiled. “Fine, just getting a drink. Harry said he hid some for me.” 

Sure enough, the box still stood relatively untouched behind two cartons of almond milk. She took a can out and showed it to Jack for effect. 

“Ah, makes sense.” She didn’t know what to make of that comment, but still cracked open the can and took a sip. 

“I was just headed back outside, so…” 

It didn’t sit well with her that they were basically the only people presently in the house. She wanted to run upstairs to Harry’s room and hide out. 

“I’ll come with you,” he said eagerly. 

They both made their way back to the throng of people on the deck and patio. Jack didn’t put his hand on her lower back like Harry did earlier. She wouldn’t have wanted him to anyway. God, why was he all she could think about?

Once they got outside, Jack led them towards a quieter corner of the deck, which wouldn’t have necessarily been her pick, but it at least gave her a good view of the crowd. 

“So do you surf a lot with Harry? Today was my first time meeting some of his friends here.”

Jack nodded. “Yeah, a couple times a week. Think he goes out more though, needs the practice.”

It was fine for Cassandra to think that, but hearing it from someone else sounded mean. “I mean, I thought he was pretty good.”

“Do you surf?” Cassandra shook her head. “Then you wouldn’t get it. I’ve been surfing since I was a kid, pretty sure he just started. You been here the whole summer?”

Pretty shitty thing to say about someone, especially considering Jack knew her and Harry were friends. She tried not to let her displeasure show too much and answered his question. 

“No, just a couple weeks now. Though I’ll be here till school starts back up. Been staying at my grandparents house down the street.”

“Oh, your grandparents? How long have they had their house?”

This felt like a trick question. She craned her neck and tried to look for Harry or even Carly in the crowd. “Since January, they just moved up from Florida,” she answered distractedly. 

Jack’s reply was drowned out once she found Harry standing across the deck, talking to two girls. They looked _preppy_. It was the Cape - and Chatham at that - so everyone definitely had that vibe already. But these girls screamed Old Money Prep. Maybe it was the infamous Emily B that Cassandra heard about inside? The girl on his left was showing him something on her phone, which Harry didn’t seem particularly interested in. He took a long sip of his beer and placed the now empty can on the table to his right. 

Cassandra watched dumbly as the girl leaned in to whisper something in his ear. His lips quirked up into a brief smile, before he pulled back and shook his head. She looked put out and said something to her friend before they left him alone. 

And then like he knew she was watching, he looked over towards her corner of the deck and their eyes locked. His smile upon seeing her quickly turned into a frown and Cassandra cocked her head questioningly, until she realized Jack was trying to get her attention. 

“- Cassandra?”

“Huh? Sorry, you were saying?”

He kept going on about his family’s house on Shore Road and how all his cousins were coming into town next week. When she thought it safe to do so, she tuned out and looked for Harry again, only to find him a little closer this time and staring at his phone while he stood on the edge of a group of guys. 

“So uhh, Harry mentioned you’re going to Yale? Congrats!”

Jack smiled. “Thanks. Yeah, almost everyone in my family’s gone. It’s kind of a thing.”

Okay, so he wouldn’t be able to offer her any real tips on applying then. Typical legacy, trust fund boy. 

“Cool, cool. It’s on my list. Definitely have the grades and test scores, just working on my personal statement and whatnot this fall.” 

College admissions essays were the one time having a congenital heart defect would definitely pay off - and maybe when she ran for political office - she would definitely be able to spin any Common App or supplement essay into a sob story about overcoming adversity amidst doctors appointments and debate club meetings. 

But then Jack started telling her about how the rigorous curriculum at St. Paul’s prepared him for Yale and how Cassandra might be a bit out of depth applying from a _public school_ which, _fuck you, Jack_. 

As she stood there, only half paying attention, she thought about how Jack would normally be someone she would have fallen head over heels for and dissected their entire conversation with Allie over text the next morning. But - but she doesn’t care. At all. 

Not when the boy in the navy t-shirt across the patio keeps staring at her like she’s the only person in the room - yard, whatever. 

And yeah, she’s staring back. 

She’s realized that even though it was actually _his_ party, there was something oddly endearing about seeing Harry not be the center of the universe for once. From meeting some of his surfing friends today and even more at the party, Cassandra learned that he was generally regarded as the shy, smart kid from Connecticut, who liked to surf and had a lot of money. Of course there were glimpses of his West Ham persona sprinkled in there, especially when he fell into his host role. 

But Harry Bingham shy?

It made her wonder if they met like this, would they have become friends? Proper friends. She really liked this Harry. He was still mainly the same guy from home, but there was just _something_ to him here that she really liked. 

Maybe it was that he was the world’s best big brother or that he took care to walk Cassandra home every night if they were out late or that he went out of his way to be with her and listen to her. And god whenever he touched her - which didn’t happen near enough - her skin tingled. 

She had noticed him making furtive glances over to her corner for the past few minutes, but Cassandra had finally caught his stare for longer than a few seconds as he was walking towards the back steps towards the lawn. She tried her best to show her distress at being trapped in conversation with Jack, hoping Harry would come over and save her from the monotony. 

But instead, he just brushed past the two of them, seemingly intent on ignoring them, until Cassandra reached out to grab his hand. 

“Hey, I’ve been looking for you.”

She pulled him closer and didn’t let go of his hand, the alcohol making her bolder than normal. In fact, she wound his arm around her back and rested it on her hip. He just stood there for a moment before wrapping his arm around her shoulders instead. 

“Uhh sorry, got caught up.” The beer can in his right hand felt cool against her skin where it brushed against her arm. “You need anything?”

_For you to get me out of here_. She smiled up at him, a little drunk and a little dopey. He had a water stain on his shirt and his hair looked a bit messy, but he still looked hot. 

“Nope, just wanted to say hi.” Something flickered behind his eyes and he looked amused at her answer. 

And just when she thought he couldn’t get any more attractive, the charm came out. 

“You boring my girl, McAvoy?” he drawled, finally looking over and acknowledging Jack.

_My girl_? She all but melted on the spot. 

Jack looked a little sheepish. “That’s not what she told me this morning...”

Harry laughed and kissed the crown of her head. Cassandra held her breath. “Hmm, lot’s changed since then.”

The boys stared at each other challengingly and Harry stood a little taller, even though he was still shorter than Jack.

“I uhh - I was just asking him about Yale,” she stammered, trying to break the tension. 

Harry briefly looked down at her with a fond smile before telling Jack: “She’s a fucking genius this one, I’m telling you. Smartest person at our school.”

Cassandra blushed, knowing he just said it to hype her up in front of Jack, but still loving the praise. “Well, he’s my biggest competition. We’re actually in all the same classes and stuff, too.” 

Which was true, even if this was the first time she’d actually realized it. They spent an obscene amount of time together for two people who had previously professed to want nothing to do with each other. 

“How else would I keep an eye on you?” he asked her directly and it didn’t seem like they were pretending anymore. 

Across from them, Jack cleared his throat. “- Right. Well, good luck with Yale if you end up applying,” he said to Cassandra before turning to Harry, “and uhh see you later, man.”

And then he was gone and Harry let go of her. 

“You’re welcome.” He took a long sip of his drink and set the empty can on the railing. 

“Huh?” She shook herself. 

He shrugged and leaned against the railing next to her. Their arms just barely brushed against each other, directly opposing how close together they were moments ago. “I got rid of him for you. Guess Mr. Ivy League wasn’t all he was cracked up to be huh?”

Right. Because they were putting on a show to get rid of Jack. Since Cassandra didn’t like Jack. She liked Harry. And Harry was just being nice. 

“No, he just - kind of talked about himself. Didn’t really care what I had to say or if he did, it was just to one up me and get the conversation directed back to himself.”

“I can’t imagine not caring about what Cassandra Pressman has to say.”

She rolled her eyes. “Harry, you routinely don’t care about what I have to say.”

He angled himself towards her and looked at her incredulously. “False, why do you think I argue with you all the time at school? Besides making you, like, get all frustrated and stuff, which is always fun, you always have something important to say. Even if I don’t always agree with you.”

“Oh, thanks.”

And with that, he turned to steal another can of beer off the table next to them. It was definitely warm and Cassandra shook her head when he offered her the first sip. She’d been nursing her third White Claw the entire time she’d been talking to Jack, but this was the third beer she’d seen Harry drink in the past half hour or so. 

“And I think you’ve proven yourself worthy tonight.”

“Oh?” She laughed. “Worthy of what?”

He looked at her accessingly and set his beer down on the railing. “Unlimited party invites this fall, now that I know you’re not a total liability or anything. Even if you do need saving from douchebag would-be frat bros.”

She rolled her eyes goodnaturedly. “Glad I passed.”

“Hmm, but now that I think about it, there might be one final test, though.” She cocked out her hip in challenge. “Dance with me, Cass. Come on,” he coaxed. 

Without waiting for a response, he took her hands in his own and swayed them back and forth, trying to match the beat of the Kacey Musgraves song currently playing, but failing spectacularly. 

She felt her resistance waning, especially when he tugged her a little closer. “There’s literally no one else dancing.”

His breath felt hot against her ear as he said, “So? It’s my party, I’ll do whatever the fuck I want. Plus, I had to watch you and Jack half the night, s’only fair I get a reward for it.”

She ducked her head. “We were - we were _not_ talking for half the night. If anything I’ve been looking for _you_ for half the night.”

“Well, you found me now and I’m not going anywhere.”

He spun her around, so her back was to his chest, and he placed his hands on her hips. She already knew her skin was warm from sitting out in the sun that morning, but feeling him pressed against her was something else entirely. 

“You smell pretty,” he said against her neck. People were staring at them, at Harry Bingham and mystery blonde he’d been seen around town with for the past three weeks. She didn’t care. “S’different from what you normally wear. More floral.”

She turned around suddenly and put her arms around his neck, so they were flush against each other. She could feel his hands tighten around her hips as she played with the ends of his hair. “Shocked you noticed something like that?”

He chuckled and rested his forehead against hers. “I always notice you, Cass. Plus, you look really hot tonight. Definitely something different.” 

Her cheeks flushed. “Well, I had a decree passed down from the highest authority, couldn’t just ignore it.”

He pulled back to smile at her adoringly. “See? You should listen to me more often.” 

“Let’s not get ahead of ourselves,” she teased. 

“Wouldn’t be the worst thing for us.” She shivered, liking how she could feel his voice rumble against her neck. “You cold?”

“Hmm? No, well maybe a little.” 

“Let me know, we can go inside and get you something if you want? Like a sweatshirt or - I mean, this dress is really nice, but the back is leaving little to the imagination,” his voice slurred slightly at the end and Cassandra almost said yes - yes to all of it, anything he asked her - until she realized. 

Shit. 

He was drunk. Way more drunk than she had originally thought and way more drunk than she was. Didn’t he say he wasn’t planning on drinking that much tonight?

Should she take his words to heart? Drunk words may have been sober thoughts, but Harry Bingham’s sober thoughts and words for the past three, really four years (they were at each other’s throats that final year of middle school, too) were in direct opposition to the sweet words he’d been whispering against her skin for the past few minutes. Maybe he was just lonely or wanted a quick hook up? 

Oh my god, he was going to kiss her. He was finally going to kiss her and she - 

“- God, I wish everybody would just fucking leave already,” he said against her neck before placing the lightest of kisses there. Cassandra’s eyes snapped open and she pulled back, breaking the fantasy.

Oh. 

“I guess I should go then.”

A little crinkle appeared between his eyebrows as he looked at her. “What? 

Her hands fell limply to her sides. “I should head out. I mean, once the first person leaves, they start a trend. The whole place will be cleared out before you know it,” she rambled. 

“What? No - wait a sec -”

“- I should really -” she thumbed over her shoulder in the general direction of her grandparents’ house. 

His chest was heaving a little, like he was out of breath. “ - Let me walk you back then.”

She shook her head and took a few steps back. “No, it’s cool. I mean, we can’t have you leave your own party, right?”

“Cass, please. What’d I do?” he whined while taking a few steps towards her.

Oh god. She felt her eyes water. Instead she leaned in to hug him. They never hugged. His arms tightened around her and he picked her up a little bit, just like how she imagined it in her daydream earlier. 

“I’ll talk to you tomorrow, okay?”

“Promise?” he said against her hair. 

She detached herself and nodded. “Promise.”

As she walked across the side yard to the gate, she brushed a wayward tear out of her eye and got her phone out. She scrolled until she found the contact she was looking for and typed out a quick message.

_You can tell your 11-12 year olds that your sister is lame, talk tomorrow_

——-

She spent the entire next day regretting it. Regretting leaving, regretting not letting him kiss her. In the light of day, a drunken hookup with Harry Bingham didn’t seem like the worst thing in the world, but she didn’t want it to be just that. She really liked him. 

So then she ignored him. He texted her five times and even called her once. His first text came right after she left, asking her to let him know when she got home, which she did. She wasn’t that much of an asshole. But then she woke up to two messages asking if she wanted to hang out before he went golfing with her grandpa that afternoon. And then he asked what shirt he should wear and if she thought his regular Nike’s would be fine for the golf course. 

But the last one really made her pause and reconsider her whole ghosting plan.

_Cass, please tell me what i did wrong_

She didn’t respond. Again, she felt like an asshole, but she didn’t respond. 

Nana asked minimal questions about the party the night before, but did level her with a hard stare when she asked for some Tylenol the next morning and scarfed down her breakfast with an unusual amount of vigor. The sugar in those White Claws was killer. 

They went to the farmer’s market in Harwich to get some corn for dinner and Nana let her pick out some flowers, almost like she knew she needed some perking up. Peonies were always her favorite, especially the pink ones, and she smiled as she arranged them on the kitchen table once they got home. She slowly got through a couple chapters of _Owen Meany_ on the back deck while Nana went over to chat with Mrs. Cooper, but kept getting distracted. 

She knew she had to text him before he got back from the course, especially since he would definitely come over and confront her and she didn’t want to talk in person yet. She was still embarrassed. 

Her drafts to him had read as such:

_Hey! sorry about last night, must have had too much to drink. Hope this doesn’t affect any future party invites. You’re probably already there, but go with the Nikes and make sure he lets you drive the cart - talk later_

_Hi! Sorry I left so quickly, figured you wanted everyone to clear out. The Nikes will be fine, have fun golfing_

_You didn’t do anything wrong, I just have a massive crush on you_

_Do you like me, y/n?_

_I like you a lot and it makes me nervous_

_I liked the way you looked at me last night, the way your hands felt on my hips as you pulled me closer when we were dancing. it reminded me of when we were at the beach and you carried me back to shore. the way your hands felt on my thighs and how I pressed my chest against your back. Or the way you called me my girl and told me to wear something different. There was nothing inherently explicit about it, but I thought about it and you the entire time I was getting ready last night and when I went to sleep. I would’ve kissed you last night if I thought it was something you really wanted_

The last one was immediately out since it was rapidly veering into _Atonement_ letter territory, so she went with the first one and promptly deleted the other entries. Except the last one. She saved it. It was still nice to read. 

With a swish, the text was sent and she felt like a weight had been lifted off her shoulders. Now he just had to respond. 

She passed the next hour or so switching between apps on her phone. Allie made her promise to keep her updated on any new memes and Tik Tok trends, so that always kept her busy for some time. And then her peace was disrupted. 

“Oh, Harry? What a nice surprise!” She heard Nana say from inside. In hindsight, she should’ve known her grandpa would’ve brought Harry back with him for dinner.

Cassandra all but ran inside to come face to face with a very bashful looking Harry. He looked adorable in his golf clothes, a ridiculous white polo with four navy stripes at the chest and a matching pair of navy shorts, and had his Ray Bans wedged between the buttons on his shirt. He ducked his head and scuffed the toe of his boat shoe on the wood floor when she entered the kitchen. She hoped he hadn’t worn them on the golf course and just changed in the car. 

“Hi, Mrs. Walker. Mr. Walker invited me over for dinner if that’s alright?”

Clearly this had not been cleared with Nana, but she was too nice to say anything to Harry. “Of course, sweetheart. You know you’re always welcome.”

“Thanks. When I mentioned the frozen pizza I had waiting for me in the fridge, he insisted I join you guys for spare ribs.” He was laying it on a bit thick, but neither Cassandra nor her grandma commented on it. 

Nana nodded. “We have plenty, why don’t you help Cassie peel the corn out back while I finish up in here?”

“Sure thing,” he said with a smile. Cassandra didn’t wait for him to follow and set off towards the back deck. 

Once the French door clicked shut behind him, she swatted him lightly. “What the fuck?”

“Um owww.” He rubbed his arm.

“What’re you playing at?”

“Worked up a real appetite on the course today, _Cassie_. And all the while I find out you’ve been lazing about the house all day, completely able to answer a text message.”

She sat down with a huff and started peeling the corn. Harry sat across from her and took an ear out, as well. 

“I texted you back.”

He rolled his eyes. “Yeah, hours later. I was putting my clubs back in the car when I got your message.”

“I wasn’t feeling well, okay?”

“Like how you weren’t feeling well last night? Sure, whatever you say.”

She changed the subject. “How was golf?”

After shooting her a disbelieving look, probably for changing the subject, he sighed. “Fine, harder than it looks. The guys on tour can drive 320-330 like nobody’s business, I think I maybe got like 220. Your Grandpa is really good, though.”

“Well, he plays enough,” she said wryly. “Wait, whose clubs did you use?”

Harry looked sheepish. “My dad’s. Don’t tell him.”

“I’m sure he’ll notice all the grass stains on them after you tore up the fairways.”

“I wasn’t _that_ bad.”

“It’s nice knowing you’re not perfect at everything.”

“Well, I’m about to make your night with something else because I don’t think I’ve ever peeled corn either.” She noticed that while she had done two ears while they’d been chatting, Harry was still on his first and was doing a rather poor job of it at that. 

“I believe the correct terminology is shucked.” 

He rolled his eyes. “Give my regards to Nebraskans everywhere.”

Cassandra got the final ear out of the bag. “Normally, Nana does it at the store, but we got these at the farmer’s market - you know, you don’t have to pick it off layer by layer. You can take a couple off at once, like this,” she demonstrated. “Finish faster.”

Harry huffed and kept doing it his way, taking care to remove each strand of corn silk. “Lately, I’ve found it’s best to go slow, wouldn’t want to scare anyone off by going too fast...”

Okay, they weren’t talking about corn anymore. She snatched the ear out of his hand and finished shucking it, herself. His jaw locked. 

“Harry?” Nana called from inside. 

“Yeah?” he asked, still looking at Cassandra. 

“Would you be a dear and put the spare ribs on the grill? Ted’s finishing up the rice and I’ve got my hands full with the salad.”

“Of course, be right there.” He got up and stood over Cassandra, who was still seated. “We’re talking after dinner,” he said quietly. 

She shifted in her chair. “Fine.” And then he squeezed her shoulder and went inside to get the spare ribs without another word. Great. 

——-

Dinner was fine, if a bit awkward. Her grandpa was pretty oblivious to the tension, but Nana knew something was up. At least the golf outing that afternoon automatically lended itself to conversation. 

It was determined that while Harry wasn’t a bad golfer, he should probably stick to watching golf and partaking in his fantasy golf league instead of trying out for the team anytime soon. Grandpa insisted he just needed a few lessons, but when Harry suggested he and Cassandra should take them together, enthusiasm for the idea suddenly ran out. 

Once the dishes were picked up and Harry and Cassandra were excused, they made their way outside. “Want to head down to the beach?” 

He shrugged. “You gonna leave me there alone?”

“Harry…” she sighed. 

“Sorry, fine. Yes, I would like to go down to the beach with you, Cassandra.” 

He kicked a pebble as they made their way down the street to his house, which was always their main beach access point. They crossed the back lawn and made their way down the tall wooden staircase to the beach below. Harry toed off his shoes and left them on the steps, while Cassandra followed suit. There was no one else on their little beach, but it was gorgeous out - truly golden hour. It was so clear, you could even see Nantucket and Monomoy. 

The breeze ruffled Cassandra’s hair and she tucked it behind her ears, trying to tamper it down a bit. 

Harry led them down to the water. “So are you going to say anything or do I literally have to do everything again?”

What was he talking about? She hugged her arms around her body, trying to block out the wind. “You were the one who wanted to talk, so talk.”

“Why didn’t you respond to any of my texts?”

Cassandra looked out at the jetty. “I responded, I was just busy today so they were a bit delayed…”

“- Bullshit. C’mon, Cass. Something happened last night and you got all weird on me. Did I do something wrong? I thought you wanted me to - whatever.”

“Do you remember a lot of it?” she asked after a moment. 

“The party?” She nodded. “I mean, I probably couldn’t tell you how many games of beer pong I won or what people were wearing, but I remember most of it.” He shook his head and smiled. “I remember a lot about you last night. I remember what you wore. But then you left.”

“I - I didn’t want to…” she said quietly. 

“I specifically remember _begging_ you not to.”

“Harry...”

He sighed and moved closer. “Cass, tell me what I did wrong, please?”

She threw her hands up. “I don’t know, okay? One minute we were dancing and you were being so - so nice to me and almost kissed me and I was about two seconds from going upstairs with you and _getting a sweatshirt_. And the next you just said how you wished everyone would leave or something and-”

“- Yeah, I wanted everyone _but_ you to leave. I wanted to hang out with _you_ , Cass. Just you.”

Suddenly, the eye contact was too much. She ducked her head. “Okay, but you were drunk. And this isn’t me nagging on you, I swear, but earlier you mentioned you weren’t really in the mood to drink too much. And so when you came up to me and were saying all these really sweet things and were drunk...”

“You didn’t think I really meant it?” he asked sadly. She shook her head. “God - no, Cass. I meant it and I’ll say it again if you want me to. And you’re right, I wasn’t planning on drinking much but then -” he trailed off, embarrassed. 

“- Then?”

He stuffed his hands in his pockets and looked down at the sand. “God this sounds so stupid, but I saw you talking to Jack and I got kind of - _I_ wanted to talk to you and make you laugh and - I really fucking like you, okay?

“And I know that seems completely fucking crazy, but I’ve really liked hanging out these past few weeks and yeah, I’m kind of a dick to you, but - I’m sorry, okay? I can’t go back and change anything, but I promise I’ll be different. I just like being around you and you make me want to do more and be more and better, I guess. And I’m so fucking sick of being interrupted every time I try to tell you or kiss you because I think about you all the time and it’s frankly getting to be a bit ridiculous -”

Cassandra surged forward and kissed him. And just like she imagined, his hands wrapped around her waist and he pulled her closer before responding fervently. _Fuck_ , she hadn’t been kissed like this _ever_. 

She could feel Harry smile against her lips before he pulled back slightly. “God, I like you so fucking much.”


	3. august slipped away into a moment in time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> in the immortal words of frank ocean ‘summer’s not as long as it used to be’ but it’s actually gonna be one more chapter - wild! who knew! looks like almost ~20k is the magic number for me again (i blame the sappy playlist i made/listened to repeatedly while writing this and whole foods champagne), so we’ll wrap things up for part i with chapter 4, but for now i want them to be disgustingly adorable and cute and repeatedly make out on couches. thanks for all the comments, let me know what you think!

_august slipped away into a moment in time_

Somehow she and Harry made their way back up the wooden staircase to the Binghams’ backyard. They were in such a hurry and a frenzy that they left their shoes down on the steps below and stumbled over to one of the padded lounge chairs that dotted the back lawn, never breaking their hold on each other and barely pausing to take a breath. 

Cassandra fell back with a sigh as he leaned over her. Her t-shirt had long since gotten untucked from her skirt, which made it easier for him to slowly drag his hands up and down her sides as he kissed her. Her lips, her cheeks, her neck, everywhere. Until he pulled back suddenly. 

“Wait, so you like me too, right?”

And she laughed. At him. At his question. At the fact that he was practically straddling her. At his messy hair that she had just run her fingers through. At the adorable look on his face. 

“Yes, you idiot. I like you, too.”

He bit his lip, trying to hold back a smile, but failed. “Oh thank god, would’ve made the next two weeks a bit awkward if you didn’t.”

“That would have been very unfortunate,” she said, trying to come across as serious. 

“You want to go on a date with me? Like a real one?”

She giggled. “Maybe…”

He laid down on his side next to her. “So they’re doing an eighties night at the drive-in if you want to go? I know last time it wasn’t quite your thing, but everyone loves _Ferris Bueller_.”

This wasn’t an off the cuff invite to go out to dinner or go to the beach. Harry had to have looked up the movie schedule and know it was something she wanted to do. And he would have had to look it up before she kissed him. 

“You really thought about this?” she asked instead. 

He shrugged one shoulder like it wasn’t a big deal. “I was going to ask you anyway, but I think it actually would be perfect for, like, a real date. I mean, the drive-in was kind of where this all started.”

And suddenly she was overcome with such a strong wave of affection for him that she leaned in to give him a quick kiss. Because she could do that now - kiss him whenever she wanted. 

“I would love to, Harry.”

He smiled so widely, his dimples appeared. “Cool, I’ll pick you up at 7:30.”

“I’m sure we’ll see each other during the day,” she teased. 

“I don’t know about that, I’ve heard absence makes the heart grow fonder…” As he spoke, Cassandra wrapped her leg around his own and pulled herself closer to him. “Or maybe not.” 

She giggled and they laid there for a moment until she realized her skirt had ridden up since they’d been laying down. Suddenly self conscious, she moved to pull it down a bit, but was stopped by Harry’s hand on her thigh just above her knee. 

“Practically jumps me on the beach and now she’s modest, I see how it is,” he teased, making slow circles on her skin. 

It felt nice. She told him as much and he smiled, looking far too pleased with himself, but continued doing it for a few moments more. 

“Here,” he said, shifting so he could wrap his arm around her. 

And they laid there, practically on top of each other - thigh to thigh, hip to hip, arm to arm - on the lounge chair for the next hour or so, listening to some music Harry played on his phone, while the sun slowly dipped out of sight. 

They talked a little, but mainly laid there just enjoying each other’s company. He played with her hair and she drew shapes on his chest through his shirt until her eyes felt heavy and Harry said he should walk her home. 

And Cassandra was happy. 

She was really happy. 

\--------------

So obviously, she needed to find someone to share her happiness. Nana and Grandpa were already upstairs since it was almost ten o’clock and though they liked Harry (and more importantly loved when he walked her home at night), Cassandra didn’t really want to go into detail regarding what they got up to that evening. They weren’t ready for that talk yet. Or ever. 

Cassandra would have to tell them something, but that could wait until tomorrow. There would probably be all sorts of rules now, too. Especially while her grandparents were still _in loco parentis_ until Harry’s dad got back with Kennedy Saturday afternoon. 

Because he was currently at his house - alone. By himself. Without any parents. Or younger sisters. All alone, in that big house. Maybe they could put off telling her grandparents for a little while. At least until Saturday. After their date. 

She smiled and twirled a lock of hair around her finger just thinking about it and she made her decision. Quickly getting out her phone, she texted the first person she thought of.

_FaceTime???_

_ALLIE_

Surprisingly, Allie actually did respond right away. 

_gahhh i can’t now, the girls are all in bed. but is everything okay? are you okay? or nana and grandpa?_

_Sorry!_

_Yeah, nothing like that_

_Shit that probably sounded bad…_

_now i’m curious. you can text me? just can’t FT_

_Text works!_

_Okay, so the party didn’t work out super well_

_And we didn’t really talk during the day today_

_But grandpa invited him over for dinner and after we went for a walk_

_And we talked and kind of figured everything out_

_And he said he ‘likes me so fucking much’_

_And then we hooked up_

_And we’re going on a date tomorrow???_

_YES CASSANDRA  
i am so pumping the air right now  
ughhhhh hot cape boy! you are living my fantasy_

_He sounded nervous asking me out too and when he told me he liked me_

_It was really sweet_

_We’re going to the drive-in tomorrow night_

_the drive in?? okay danny zuko...  
and i need a visual. the 11-12 years olds have been INSISTENT on getting a picture_

Yeah, that still wasn’t going to happen anytime soon. She’d have to figure out some way to put Allie off for a little longer. Just until she got a better feel for how Harry felt about them - when they got back to West Ham and everything. But in all fairness, his sister would definitely know about them. Maybe she _could_ tell Allie?

_I’ll see what I can do_

_He surfs, Allie. SURFS_

_And he cuffs his jeans, which sounds super nerdy, but like he does it in a cute way_

_is he preppy?  
wait that was dumb, of course he is  
you’re nothing if not consistent..._

_Ummmm what’re you talking about???_

_But I guess he is, to an extent_

_But not like Vineyard Vines polo shirt and shorts preppy, like 90s J Crew catalog preppy. And he’s smart, like super smart and funny and so sweet to his sister_

_I really like him, Allie_

_God this is NAUSEATING  
Cassandra has a BOYFRIEND_

_He is not my boyfriend, we’re literally going on our first date tomorrow_

_haven’t you literally been going on ‘dates’ for weeks?  
didn’t you go watch him surf the other day and have lunch at some waspy cape institution? or all your drives and getting ice cream??  
god it’s nauseating just typing this out_

_Well I guess, but that was just as friends_

_This is like a deliberate ‘date’_

_but now the real question_

Cassandra held her breath. 

_is he a good kisser?_

_Yeah_

While she didn’t have that much experience, Harry made her feel different than any guy she’d ever kissed before. He was insistent, but gentle at the same time - like he couldn’t believe he got to be with _her_ and that she was letting him kiss _her_. 

_‘yeah’ that’s all you’re going to give me?_

_I don’t know, it’s kind of awkward to talk about it_

_LAME  
my big sister is LAME_

_Sorry! I’ll let you know how the drive-in goes_

_lol you won’t, you’ll just be like ‘he was so sweet, he bought me a soda pop and we shared a straw’_

_Night Allie…_

_night loser ❤️_

\-----------

They spent the next afternoon together at the beach. Nothing really changed, well not too much. Harry still went surfing in the morning, Cassandra still hung out with Nana at the house for a bit, and her grandpa still went golfing with his friends.

But Harry joined Cassandra and Nana down at the beach for lunch and swimming and greeted her with a kiss on the lips instead of his normal _hey_. All Nana said was _nice to see you kids sorted everything out_. But Cassandra knew she was in for a talk later.

They swam together for a bit and strolled up and down the beach, looking for shells in the tide pools along the jetty at low tide. 

So yeah, not much really changed from before. Except now Harry would kiss her and touch her all the time. Not in a possessive way, but like he was making up for all the times he wanted to before and couldn’t. 

A hand on her arm when he was excited to tell her something. His fingers interlocked with hers as they walked down the beach. A kiss just because he thought she looked pretty. His fingertips grazing down her arm or the inside of her thigh. Little things that made her heart beat faster and her cheeks flush. 

They had just gotten back from a walk down the beach and were finishing the watermelon Nana brought down while they were on their walk when Harry brought up their _date_. 

“So, I’m gonna head back up, but I’ll pick you up at 7:30?”

Nana looked between the two of them eagerly. “Oh? Do you have plans?”

“We’re going to the drive-in later.” 

Beside her, Harry nodded. “Yeah, it’s an 80s night, double feature thing. I would invite you, Mrs. Walker, but I don’t know if we’d all be comfortable in the Jeep, bit of a tight fit in the back.”

Cassandra idly recalled her conversation with Allie last night and her insinuation of what her and Harry could get up to at the _drive-in_. Especially with the _tight fit_ in the backseat. 

Nana chortled, jarring Cassandra from her thoughts. “Oh, stop. That sounds lovely, it should be a perfect night for it, too.”

Harry looked up at the sky assessingly. “I should get going, have to get some stuff ready for Ken and my dad when they come back tomorrow. Thanks for the lunch, Mrs. Walker. And I’ll see you later, Cass.” 

And with a quick peck on Cassandra’s cheek - Nana was literally sitting right in front of them - Harry was off. 

“Isn’t he just the nicest boy?” Nana practically gushed. 

“He can be,” Cassandra said fondly. 

Nana hummed. “So thoughtful and considerate, but that doesn’t mean you’re allowed to be at his house by yourself, especially while his father isn’t home...”

“Nana!” Her cheeks flushed and it had nothing to do with all the sun she had gotten earlier that day. They’d only been a _thing_ for less than twenty four hours. It wasn’t like they were - they wouldn’t _do_ anything like _that_. 

_Yet_ a traitorous voice in the back of her mind supplied.

“I’m just saying,” Nana held her hands up, “and I’m going to tell him the same thing when he picks you up later.”

Cassandra snapped her head to face her grandma. “No, Nana. Please don’t, it’s embarrassing.”

“I’m in charge of both of you, at least for the next few hours. There will be no _funny business_ , understood?” Nana said sternly.

The fact that her grandmother was implying that Cassandra was going to have sex with Harry imminently was beyond mortifying, but she nodded nonetheless. “Yes, ma’am.”

“Good.” Nana went back to her book. “Now, why don’t we head up in a bit? Guess we’ll have to have an early dinner tonight. How about burgers and macaroni salad?”

Cassandra rolled her eyes. “Sure thing, Nana.”

\-------------  
A few hours later, it felt a bit like _deja vu_ as Cassandra got ready for her date. The day actually had played out pretty similar to the last time she went to the drive-in with Harry, right down to the gorgeous weather.

But, of course, it wasn’t quite the same at all. Hell, last time she was scared he was going to leave without her and this time she was scared that Nana was going to embarrass them both by talking about curfews and _keeping your hands to yourself_. She had just finished brushing her teeth when the doorbell rang. 

“I’ll get it,” Cassandra shouted before dashing out of her room. She had to double back to get her phone, but wanted to beat her grandparents to the door to avoid their, but primarily Nana’s fussing. 

However, the few seconds she lost doubling back to her room provided her downfall and she heard an overly cheerful: “Cassandra, Harry’s here.”

She quickly made her way down the stairs to the foyer and saw that Harry was standing on the stoop and engaged in what looked like a serious conversation with Nana. It must have been the same one she had with Cassandra earlier because Harry’s cheeks were slightly red. 

Meanwhile, her grandpa smiled at her once she made her way over. “Have a good time,” he said quietly. 

“Thanks,” she said. And then he gave Harry a quick wave over Nana’s shoulder and made his way back towards the living room, where the _Jeopardy_ intro could be heard coming from the TV. 

Cassandra made her way to the front door and stood behind Nana, where she caught the tail end of Harry’s conversation. 

“...Yeah, we’ll be back around one. It’s a double feature - hey, Cass.”

“Hi,” she said quietly. With Nana focused on Cassandra at the moment, Harry gave her a quick wink. 

She knew the skirt and top combination had been a good idea. Nothing too fancy, it _was_ still the drive-in and kids literally wore their pajamas, but she felt cute. If she got cold, she could always borrow one of the sweatshirts she knew he kept in the Jeep. And she figured he would like that she wore a skirt. At least he did last night. 

“Alright, well drive safely and enjoy your movies.”

Harry smiled and tilted his head slightly, signaling for Cassandra to come outside. “Thanks, Mrs. Walker.”

“Bye,” Cassandra said as her and Harry made their way down the front walk to the Jeep. 

“And Harry?” He turned around. “Remember what I said, dear,” she said sweetly, but her pointed look said otherwise. 

“Of course, Mrs. Walker.” 

Ignoring whatever that was for at least the time being, they got into the car. “Hi,” he said before leaning in for a kiss. 

While Cassandra didn’t doubt that Nana was still watching through the window until they would drive away, she didn’t care. 

“Hi, yourself,” she said once he pulled away.

“Someone was a little heavy handed with the Off,” Harry said referencing the deet smell that filled the car once Cassandra got situated.

She leveled him with a hard stare. “I got bit like crazy last time, brought some for you, too, because in case you haven’t noticed, this car doesn’t exactly have a roof on it.”

He gasped. “You’re kidding me, really? I should get a refund.”

They pulled out of the driveway and set off down the street. Harry was adamant that Cassandra not touch the playlist he made, calling it _perfect_ and something even she wouldn’t complain about - so far, he had yet to be proven otherwise. 

It was gorgeous outside, the last remnants of the day’s sun stretching across the sky as they made their way north to Wellfleet. Cassandra was beyond excited, almost verging on giddy. Beside her, Harry looked so handsome, dressed in relatively simple olive green shorts and navy linen button down. 

She angled her body towards him, which unbeknownst to her, caused her skirt to ride up slightly. “You look nice.”

“Thanks, I may have tried on four different shirts before I picked this one…” he mumbled. 

She found this more endearing than he probably thought. “Your closet must be a disaster,” she said with faux solemnity. 

“And the cleaning lady isn’t even coming till Monday. I’m sure yours is perfect as always?”

She nodded. “Of course.”

And that was technically true, but only because, in a fit of nervous energy, she put everything back after ultimately deciding on the third outfit she tried on that evening.

“Hmm, you look pretty.” 

Without taking his eyes off the road in front of him, he rested his right hand on her left thigh, just below the hem of her skirt, and lightly ran his hand up and down her thigh before ultimately putting his hand back on the steering wheel. For a moment, Cassandra forgot how to breath. 

She cleared her throat. “So uhh, you only mentioned _Ferris Bueller’s Day Off_ last night, but you told my grandparents it was a double feature - like twice - so which is it?”

“Well,” he stretched out, “it _is_ only one movie, but they think we aren’t coming back till one. And since I’m technically not allowed to be alone with you - or so I was told…”

Her mouth gaped open. How had she not thought of that? “You think you’re slick, don’t you?”

“Slick?” He scrunched his nose and briefly looked at her before changing lanes. 

“Awfully presumptuous of you, if you ask me.”

“You complaining?”

No - well, at least not if his plans for the evening were similar to those from last night. She liked kissing him and how it felt when his hands slid underneath her shirt. 

“Not yet.”

He looked stupidly pleased with himself. “Got to make the most of my time with you, Ken and my dad come back tomorrow.” 

“Oh come on, it won’t be that bad.”

“Guess not. I did kind of like being on my own, though.”

“Even if the only decent food you had all week was at my house?” 

He scoffed. “It was a good excuse to come over and see you. Plus, I can’t cook, so…” She laughed. “But yeah, I did like being on my own, but only for a little while. Like I think the three of us have gotten closer this summer. Just being around each other and having dinner together like every night has been nice. Even if dad’s just in the house working and Ken and I are at the beach, it’s nice having him here.”

“No, I totally get that. I miss my parents, too. Like we talk almost everyday, but it’s not really the same. We just talk about the high level stuff, like I know my dad had a big presentation at work last week, but I don’t know what errands my mom did today or what they had for dinner tonight.”

Harry nodded. “So you guys are like that at home? You actually eat dinner together every night and stuff like that?”

She never really thought about it, but she supposed they did. “Yeah, most nights at least. My mom really likes to cook, but sometimes I have a late meeting at school or rehearsal or something, so I eat later.”

He had gotten a little quiet. “That’s nice.”

She took it the Binghams did _not_ have dinner together every night. Karen Bingham didn’t exactly strike her as _Laura Petrie_ or even _Olivia Benson_ , but she figured the Binghams were at least _familial_ around each other. She bit her lip in thought, not wanting to ruin the mood, but had wanted to ask her next question for the past few weeks. 

“Do you miss your mom?”

Harry’s scoff answered her question. “No, think we’re all pretty content that she hasn’t been up much. The two weeks we were in Italy earlier this summer were the longest time the four of us have spent together uninterrupted in the past like five years.”

She knew the Binghams weren’t close, but it was another thing for Harry to say it so plainly. “Oh, really?”

“I mean, it’s kind of obvious we aren’t the fucking Brady Bunch.” 

“I’ve gathered,” she said slowly, not wanting to upset him. 

He shrugged. “I mean, not to be a dick about it, but the only reason my parents haven’t gotten a divorce is because my dad got sick and that would be beyond fucked.”

“You’ve - I mean, none of you have ever said what he’s sick with - which I totally get, I don’t like people knowing about my heart either, they tend to ask a lot of questions and never the right ones -”

“- Hepatocellular carcinoma,” he said clinically, like he had heard the term a hundred times and at this point he probably had. “Liver cancer.”

Oh. 

Cassandra used to see the cancer kids in the hospital a lot when she was younger, back when her own health wasn’t quite so under control. It was tough seeing it in kids, but just because Mr. Bingham was an adult, didn’t make it any easier. The prognosis for most cancers wasn’t stellar, but she knew liver cancer had a particularly bad one. 

“I’m sorry, how long has it been since he was diagnosed?”

Harry nodded slowly, but kept his eyes laser focused on the road in front of them. “He was in remission a while, but it came back really bad this past winter. It’s not _good_ ,” he said the last word carefully. 

“It’s why he works from home all the time now, too. Ken and I thought he should just take a leave of absence or whatever - and again, like not to be a dick about it, but we really don’t need the money - but he likes it, keeps him busy.”

“What does he do exactly? Like I know he works in the city in finance or something, he mentioned it once. But like I don’t even know what my own dad actually does.”

That got a slight laugh out of Harry. But it was true, she didn’t. All she knew was that her dad was a consultant at a big accounting firm. So the fact that she had a vague notion of what Mr. Bingham did was saying something. 

“He’s a managing director at a private equity firm. I still don’t entirely know what that means either, but I do know that I have literally zero interest in going into finance.”

There was definitely a story behind that. “Come on, you’re not that bad at math…” she opted for a joke and got a wry smile out of him. 

“It’s stressful as fuck and the lifestyle is just - you’re always going, even when you’re not. Clients, reports, the market’s volatile - everything.”

She looked at him curiously and Harry sighed. 

“Look, my dad’s great, okay? I love him a lot and he’s always been there for Ken and me. But he didn’t always make the best choices. He drank a lot when I was younger - he’d never do anything really bad, like he didn’t get violent or yell or anything. But it wasn’t always - I think he just did it to cope with everything. With work, money - I was little, but I still remember it was pretty bad right after Ken was born, around ‘08 and ‘09. And instead of helping him or whatever, my mom just pretended like nothing was wrong.

“Like she has all these ridiculous standards and ideas of how we should all be and everything has to be fucking perfect - or at least it has to appear perfect. Her, us, the house, the fucking town - everything. It all has to be perfect - you know, one of the reasons why you used to annoy me so much was because she’d always compare me to you.”

Cassandra frowned, but still felt the need to defend him. “That’s not fair.”

“It wasn’t fair that I took it out on you either,” he said matter of factly. “Whatever, I’m _growing_ , it’s good for me. Think it’s been good for all of us to be away from her for a bit.”

Understatement of the year. Cassandra never had a particularly strong opinion one way or the other about Karen Bingham, but after tonight her opinion was firmly negative. 

But god, did she love that Harry felt comfortable enough to tell her all this. To practically pour his heart out about his dad and how messed up his parents actually were. But he was still Harry. And he was still a seventeen year old boy and the gravity of all that he just told her was probably just hitting him. So, Cassandra would be supportive, but keep things light. 

“No, that definitely makes sense from what you’ve told me. It doesn’t make you a bad person for not getting along with your mom, Har. I mean, the woman wants you to go to Cornell. She can’t be all that sane.” 

He laughed then, an honest and true laugh without a hint of bitterness and Cassandra knew he’d be okay. At least for right now. And then she’d work on tomorrow and the next day and the day after that and - and -

“- I think I definitely want to go someplace nearby-ish. Want to be around Ken - and my dad.”

That was what Cassandra liked about Yale. She would be close to her parents and Allie, but far enough away that she could be her own person. 

“Totally get that - hey, you know, with your GPA, I think you _might_ be able to get into Quinnipiac,” she teased. 

He smiled at her briefly and changed lanes. “Jesus, you’re full of the jokes tonight, aren’t you.”

“I’m in a good mood. And I think you needed it.”

“Thanks,” he said, suddenly serious again. “I know that wasn’t exactly a first date conversation, but thanks for listening and caring and making me laugh.”

He was right, it wasn’t a first date conversation. But they were so beyond that at this point. She squeezed his hand that was resting on the center console. “Of course, thanks for telling me.” 

They arrived at the drive-in not long after. Harry paid for their tickets _again_ and parked the car near where they were last time. There were a decent amount of people there already, which surprised Cassandra considering it was an older movie and they still managed to charge $13 for one showing, instead of the usual two. 

This time, they chatted as they waited in line at the concession stand and even had the same cashier as last time. He definitely didn’t recognize them, but her and Harry shared a secret smile when he pointedly handed over his credit card. Once their provisions - a large bucket of popcorn, two _caffeine free_ Diet Cokes, and a box of Junior Mints - were acquired, they made their way back to the Jeep and got situated. There weren’t any previews tonight and the movie got started right away. 

“You know,” Cassandra said after taking a sip of her soda, “you kind of have that Ferris energy? Might be the hair.”

Harry looked at the screen thoughtfully. “You think? And that makes you who? Sloane Peterson?”

She scoffed. “God, I wish. No, I’m definitely Cameron.” He laughed. “Come on, you know it’s true.”

“Hmmm, we should do this,” he said through a mouthful of popcorn. 

“What? Play truant?” Cassandra teased. 

He shrugged. “Yeah, skip school and take the car - no, take the _train_ into the city one day. Go to the _Met_ , have lunch at _Del Posto_ , maybe crash a parade -”

“- You are such a nerd!” He blushed. “You really have this all planned out.” 

It was beyond adorable, she just wished they’d actually do it. And that she knew where they would stand when they got back to school after Labor Day. 

“I’ve thought about it a bit in the past few minutes…” he tried to say indifferently.

Cassandra smiled widely. “It’s sweet. I wanna do it.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” she nodded, “sometime in the spring, though. It’ll be easier for me to plan a cuter outfit in the spring than the fall,” she said jokingly.

Harry popped a handful of Junior Mints in his mouth and Cassandra wondered if he’d taste like them when she kissed him. Maybe that had been the plan all along?

“Don’t mind this one. Would love to see it across the room from me in debate one day.”

She blushed. “Don’t think it would pass the dress code.”

He leaned over to her side of the car and kissed her neck, right below her ear. “Hmmm, I can check for you?”

“Harry!” With a look around to see if any of the cars around them were looking, Cassandra lightly swatted his arm. 

“Fine, fine,” he said goodnaturedly as he pulled back to his side of the car. 

They kept watching the movie from their respective sides of the car for the next half hour or so, laughing along at the appropriate parts and saying the iconic lines when they knew them. But Cassandra kept getting distracted. 

By Harry. And the way he looked so relaxed sitting next to her, like he wasn’t at all distracted by thoughts of his hands all over her body or his lips on hers like she was. And she was, to the point of frustration. Especially since Ferris reminded her way too much of the boy next to her. All the charisma and sweetness that they both exuded. And a little bit of the snark.

Without taking his eyes off the screen, Harry offered her the rest of his Junior Mints. “Here, you can finish them.”

She peered into the box to see there were five or so left and poured them into her hand. Beside her, Harry also moved the popcorn bucket from off the center console to the back seat, even though they weren’t done with it yet, and then did the same thing with their sodas. Cassandra watched this all with a critical, and only slightly suspicious, eye before focusing back on the movie. 

The kids were currently at the _Art Institute of Chicago_ and the parade was about to start, which had always been her favorite part. And everything was nice and peaceful and just _good_.

She felt happy and turned to look at Harry, only to see that he was already looking at her. His smile widened and then he leaned in and kissed her. He tasted like Junior Mints. 

Cassandra put her hands on his shoulders, pulling him closer to her, but was held back by the confines of the center console. Harry pulled back slightly and brought his lips to her cheek, her chin, her neck, biting and sucking slightly on her pulse point. 

It felt good, but she wanted to be closer to him. “Hold on.” He stopped right away. “Sit back.”

He looked slightly confused, but did as he was told. Then, with a surprising amount of dignity considering she was wearing a relatively short skirt, Cassandra made her way over to his side of the car. She bracketed her thighs on either side of his legs and put her hands on his shoulders, rubbing them slightly. 

“Well, this is a surprise...”

She tried to get situated better, but ended up bumping her elbow against the door. “Sorry - oof.”

“Wait, I’ll recline the chair.” It helped a bit. At least now the steering wheel wasn’t digging into her back as much. 

“Do you want to switch -”

He held her in place and made slow but insistent circles on her hips with his thumbs. “- No, I kind of like this...” 

“Shut up.”

She leaned back down to kiss him, liking the way he reacted when she grinded her hips against his. Their current position wasn’t the most comfortable thing in the entire world, her legs were definitely going to fall asleep soon, but it still felt nice being there with him. Running her fingers through his hair, sliding her lips against his, feeling his hands inch their way underneath her shirt. 

But then Cassandra kind of remembered where _there_ actually was. 

“Harry - Harry?” She let out between kisses until he finally pulled back, albeit hesitantly. “There isn’t a roof on this car,” she said quietly. 

“Yeah?” His voice sounded rough against her neck where he was kissing her collarbone.

“Oh - uhh p-people can see…”

He pulled back and looked impish. “I’m not about to _defile_ you in the front seat of my Jeep, Cass. Have entirely different plans for that…” he said quietly. 

His words sent a pleasant tingle through her body. She leaned in to kiss him again, before pulling back. “Wait, do you think anyone’s looking?”

Harry shook his head. “But let me check,” he said before kissing her on the forehead and sitting up further so he could get a better look around. “I think we’re good.”

Cassandra idly heard _Danke Schoen_ playing in the background as Harry dragged his hands up her shirt and skirted the edge of her bra. 

“Wa-wait, this is my favorite part.”

He shook his head, leaning forward as she pulled away. “No, no, we’ll watch it again tomorrow,” he said against her neck before grazing his teeth against the skin there. 

“We’re going to get in trouble.”

He chuckled. “What? Little Miss Perfect can’t be seen with a boy’s hand up her skirt at the drive-in?” 

As he spoke, his right hand inched higher up her thigh and towards the edge of her underwear. The _Little Miss Perfect_ comment would go unaddressed for the time being as she instead let out a gasp in surprise when his hand slipped beneath the lace fabric by her hip. 

“Careful, not so loud.”

It wasn’t even like he was doing anything yet, he was just teasing her, but his hands were the slightest bit calloused and felt pleasantly rough against her sensitive skin. 

“Got to say, bit surprised about this,” he said as his thumb ghosted her skin through the lace. 

Why did he always know the right thing to say to make her skin tingle? She felt her cheeks get hot. “We should - the movie. We should focus back on the movie.”

He looked a little disappointed, but still nodded. “Yeah, actually think my foot’s falling asleep.”

Cassandra leaned in to give him a final kiss and made sure to pull on his lip slightly when she pulled away. But now the question was how would she get back to her side of the car? Thankfully, Harry’s seat was reclined, but hers was very much not and the center console posed another problem. The adrenaline rush that she had to get over to his side of the car had since passed and she wanted to maintain some grace and poise when she got off him. 

He seemed to understand her hesitance. “Alright, move your left leg first and then swing over.” 

She gave him a look, but did as he suggested. Unfortunately, her left knee landed on the seatbelt on the passenger seat and in her shock, she kneed Harry in the thigh. 

“Owww.”

“Fuck.”

They both let out at the same time. Cassandra managed to get fully in her seat soon after and they both looked at each other and dissolved into laughter. 

“Smooth, Pressman.”

She held her hands up. “Hey, you were the one whose idea it was.”

“Well, you were the one who crawled over in the first place. We probably should’ve sat in the back, though.”

“Didn’t hear any complaints from you…” She leaned in towards him, but still kept herself just far enough out of his reach.

“No because it was really hot.” 

She blushed. “Watch the movie.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

\----------------

They made it through the rest of the movie without any further incidents impeded by the Jeep’s center console. And even though he complained about it, Cassandra made Harry stay until the end of the movie when Ferris finally told everyone to _go home_ after the credits rolled. 

On the way home, they listened to the rest of Harry’s _Spotify_ playlist and went over their story for her grandparents. For the second movie of their _double feature_ , they decided on the _Goonies_ since it was one of Harry’s favorites and also an 80s classic. Cassandra had seen it once when she was eight - she had a vague recollection of seeing a pirate ship in a cave - but Harry went over the entire plot like he was doing a director’s cut commentary and Cassandra felt like she had sat through all one hundred and fifteen minutes of _seriously, Cassandra, it’s the best Sean Astin movie. none of his other films compare_. 

Which begged the question, how was she only now realizing how much of a nerd Harry was? It was disgustingly adorable. 

They got back to his house shortly after debating which John Hughes movie was the best (Harry voted for _Ferris Bueller’s Day Off_ while Cassandra went with _She’s Having a Baby_ ). Neither of them were _Breakfast Club_ fans. 

“- It’s just a bit ridiculous that these kids, who were literally strangers the day before would open up about all that shit just because they were in detention together,” Harry said as he got out of the car and set off for the backyard. 

Cassandra followed after him. “I’m not disagreeing with you, but I do think it has one of the better soundtracks of the bunch.”

The motion sensor light came on and illuminated the backyard and patio. She could hear the waves crashing on the beach below.

“Fine, I’ll give you that.” He threw his phone down on the patio table. “You want a drink or something? I have to get rid of everything before my dad comes back tomorrow.”

Cassandra shrugged and sat down on one of the patio chairs. “Sure, whatever you’re having is fine.”

He nodded and went through the in-swing french doors to the living room, leaving her outside. It was a bit chilly and she was glad Harry had given her his sweatshirt in the car. It was a worn grey crew neck that said _Chatham_ in navy letters. She didn’t know the last time he wore it, but it definitely smelled like his cologne. She wondered what he wore? It was probably expensive -

“- Hope this is okay?” He placed a can of _PBR_ in front of her.

She nodded and took a sip. It wasn’t what she would’ve chosen for herself, but at least it was cold. 

“Shocked this is all you have left,” she joked. 

He laughed. “I know, right?” Then fiddled around in his pocket for something, which was soon revealed to be his juul. “Do you mind if I…?”

“No, you’re good.” He took a drag. “You know, those will kill you.”

“So I hear,” he dipped his head back and blew out the vapor. 

It smelled good, like cucumber. “Can I - can I try it?”

Harry sat up a little and looked at her curiously. “Really?”

She shrugged. “Yeah, wanna see what you’re willing to destroy your lungs over.”

He rolled his eyes, but slid the juul across the table to her. “Be my guest, don’t take too big of a drag, though. It being your first time and all…”

She made a face, but held the juul between her fingers like a cigarette and brought it to her mouth and inhaled. She coughed and Harry, to his credit, didn’t laugh, but did quirk an eyebrow at her. 

“You good?”

Even though it tasted like shit, she greedily took a sip of her _PBR_. “Fine.”

He leaned across the table to take the juul out of her hand. “Think you’re all set.”

She held it out of his reach. “Give me one more try, I know what to do now.” 

“Fine.” He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back in his chair to watch her with a critical eye. 

This time she knew what to expect and didn’t take as big of a drag. The cucumber vapor filled her chest briefly and then she exhaled. The vapor cloud wasn’t as thick as Harry’s, but she was pleased she managed to figure it out. And now she could taste the cucumber on her lips. 

“Not bad, now give it back. I don’t want you to get addicted. You know, those things will kill you…” he teased. 

She slid the juul across the table. “Spoilsport.”

He slipped it back in his shorts pocket. The motion sensor light went off and Harry flailed his hand above his head, trying to get it back on to no success until he stood up. 

Cassandra cleared her throat. “So, I’ve been thinking.” He sat back down and looked at her warily. “I want to plan something for us to do since you always plan everything, which is nice, but like I want to have something for us to do, too.”

Harry nodded slowly. “This is true.”

She smiled. “Okay, so I’ve wanted to do this for awhile and Nana always puts me off, but I know you can’t resist me, so you’ll do it.”

Very bold, but she caught his interest. “I can’t resist you, huh?”

A massive understatement. She nodded. “I want to go to the Vineyard - for the day.”

He looked surprised, but not in a bad way. “Oh, we can definitely do that. It’s not far to Woods Hole and then we can take the ferry. You’ve never been? It’s really nice, especially if you go during the week.”

She shook her head. “Nana isn’t a big boat fan, but I’ve always wanted to go.”

“Then we’ll go, check the weather and pick a day.” 

“You’re too good to me,” she said sarcastically. 

He sighed dramatically. “I mean, somebody’s gotta step up. Seems like I’ve been a lot of your firsts lately, Cass.” They both froze. “Not that I - I mean, I was just referring to the drive-in and surfing and stuff like that, not like - but like -”

He seemed embarrassed and she didn’t want him to stew for too long. “Well, you were my first actual date. I’d never been on one before.”

At this, he looked surprised. He rested both of his arms on the table and leaned forward. “Wait, really?”

This time it was her turn to be embarrassed. “Yeah, don’t know if you’ve really noticed, but I’m not exactly the most approachable or likeable person at school...”

“Well,” he drew out, “you _are_ intimidating, Cass. But what if I like that you’re a smart ass? Smarty pants? Smart ass? Take your pick. Almost told you once, too.”

“That I’m a smart ass? Pretty sure you’ve called me worse before.” And she had also called him worse. 

He rolled his eyes. “No, that I liked you.”

Even now, it was still oddly flattering for him to admit it. “Wait, really? When?”

Harry nodded and took a sip of his beer. The can sounded empty when he put it down on the table. 

“We were at the Forensics thing at Harvard, must have been sophomore year? And you absolutely _destroyed_ this senior from Newton or something in the semis and I fancied myself like half in love with you for the next six hours until you told me to fuck off at the delegate dance.”

She covered her mouth with her hand in shock. This would have been just after she got over her crush on him and, to be fair, she was definitely a little bitter. 

“You did not.”

“Hand to god.” He held his right hand up. “And then I hooked up with this blonde from - you know, I don’t remember where she was from.”

“But you remember she was blonde?” she teased. 

He rolled his empty can between his hands. “Was the best I could do on short notice, especially after my first choice fell through.”

Cassandra blushed. “I probably wouldn’t have been too receptive anyway. You annoyed the shit out of me sophomore year, I had only just gotten over my stupid crush on you.”

She saw no harm in telling him now, she wasn’t embarrassed by it or anything. Instead, he just smiled. 

“And here we are.”

“And here we are.”

 _Here_ of course being sitting on the Binghams’ back patio after what would hitherto be referred to as the gold standard of first dates. Cassandra figured she would go on plenty of dates someday - first dates at that - but this one would always hold a special place in her heart, in large part thanks to the boy across from her. 

God, she really wanted him to kiss her again. But not be held back by the confines or awkwardness of the front seat of the Wrangler. Harry’s knees kept bumping hers underneath the table, but it seemed like they were miles away. Shouldn’t they be all over each other? They were for that brief time in the car - or even last night on the lounge chair. Maybe he didn’t think she was a good kisser?

Wait - the lounge chair. 

“Do you wanna go somewhere else?”

That adorable little crinkle appeared between his eyebrows as he looked at her. “You mean like get ice cream or something? I don’t think anywhere will be open now -”

Cassandra managed to laugh in spite of her embarrassment. “- No, like do you want to sit somewhere else? Like last night?”

“Oh - yeah. Yeah, that’d be nice.” He nodded along as he spoke. 

Cassandra hadn’t felt awkward at all the entire night, but she did as they were both walking over to one of the lounge chairs. Maybe it was because this felt deliberate. Like there was no reason for them to go over here other than to hook up. It was weird, but not necessarily bad. 

She sat down first and then Harry laid next to her and wrapped his arm around her shoulder and pulled her closer to him. They just laid there for a few moments, looking up at the stars. The motion sensor light on the back patio even went off. 

“Want to go to the beach tomorrow?” They were so close she could feel the vibrations of his voice. “Dad and Ken are coming back in the afternoon,” he groused. 

She pretended to consider this. “Hmmm, then I guess I’ll have to get up early. You know, make the most of the day and all…”

“Come over for breakfast. Tell your grandparents you’re going down to the beach early or something. Please?”

She already was going to say yes, but the _please_ made her cut her teasing short just a little bit. 

“You gonna cook for me?” There was no way Harry could cook. Like she had seen him burn popcorn - even on the popcorn setting. 

He opened and closed his mouth before finally saying: “No, but we’ll go pick something up and come back here. Yeah, we’ll do that. I’ll pick you up and make it look like we’re going out to eat then we’ll come back here.”

“I’d like that.” She laid her head back down on his chest. 

“Good, got to make the most of my time with you…” He kissed her neck, just below her ear, and continued downward until he reached the edge of the sweatshirt she borrowed from him, while his hand inched its way underneath it. His hands were warm and Cassandra was pleased to finish what they started earlier at the drive-in. 

And they stayed there until just before one o’clock when Harry made a big show of dropping her off in the car, so it looked like they actually had just come back from the drive-in. The next morning, Nana and grandpa were none the wiser.

\----------

They managed to sneak away _again_ the following morning without a hitch. Harry said that the key was to offer enough details that the lie was believable - like what they ate or how much the bill was - but it was best to steer clear of things that could be easily disputed, like who their waitress was or if there was a long wait. 

It could’ve been the high with getting away with it last night, but Harry got far too much enjoyment in sneaking _back_ into his house with the takeout bags, and even gave each of them codenames - _Smarty Pants_ and _Falcon 2_ were settled on after much debate - and insisted that Cassandra wait in the car for five minutes after he went inside so as to not raise suspicion. As she was sitting, crouched down as instructed, in the Jeep she wondered again if Harry had always been such a nerd or if she just brought it out in him? And also why he hadn’t just parked the car in the garage?

Five minutes later, Cassandra went down the path on the side of the house by the outdoor shower and met Harry in the backyard where he had set up their breakfast at the patio table. It was already a bit warm at eleven thirty, so he had the umbrella up, though his nitro cold brew had already created a pool of condensation on the table. 

“All good, _Falcon 2_?” She put additional emphasis on the codename and was rewarded with a pleased smile.

They both sat down and popped open their takeout containers and moved their food to their plates. Harry got pancakes and bacon and they split an order of beignets, while Cassandra got eggs benedict. 

“You know, you could have just parked the car in the garage…” she said casually. 

He put his fork down and looked at her with wide eyes. “Why didn’t you say anything before?” She chuckled. “Shit, I’ll be right back.” 

While he was gone, Cassandra reorganized the table, taking care to put the takeout containers back in the bag and stage everything nicely for the picture she was going to put on her Instagram story. Harry had brought out some basic white plates that popped nicely on the teak patio table that practically screamed _Restoration Hardware’s_ summer catalogue. 

Just as she was about to snap her photo, Harry ran across the yard and flopped back down into his chair. “And that was why your codename was _Smarty Pants_.”

“Happy to be of service.” She smiled as she tilted her phone down at the table to get their full spread. Harry’s nitro cold brew was a surprisingly nice juxtaposition to her orange juice. 

The angle wasn’t right though, so she stood up. “Do you always drink coffee? I don’t think I’ve seen you drink it before, to be honest.” 

He opened his mouth to respond, then pursed his lips in thought. “Yeah, I started last spring during AP exams. I like making it on my own, too. But haven’t quite mastered this yet.” He gestured to his drink. 

Now content with her photo, she quickly posted it and sat back down. “I’m not really supposed to drink it. A lot of caffeine isn’t good for my heart - especially whatever _that_ is. But I like decaf sometimes.”

“Well, I _like_ the taste. And I need the energy, normally don’t sleep well,” he said quietly. 

“That sucks, sorry.” He shrugged. “Falling or staying asleep?”

He took care to chew his food first before replying. “Both, I guess? It’s like my brain can’t shut off at night.”

She nodded thoughtfully. “Like existential stuff or _shit I didn’t do my homework_ stuff?”

“Both, I guess?” he repeated his words from earlier. “My dad has the same problem, but he’s been sleeping better lately, think it’s his medication or something.”

Made sense. “And the fresh air is probably good, too? At least that’s what my mom always says. You’re always tired after a day at the beach.”

Harry nodded and ate the last forkful of his pancakes. How the hell did he finish so quickly? “I have slept better the past few days, I guess...”

He lightly kicked her chair, teasingly, and Cassandra smiled. “The beignets are good.”

“The strawberry sauce is the best, I think,” he said after taking a sip of coffee. “The chocolate one is too rich.”

Cassandra took one from the plate and liberally dipped it in the strawberry sauce as suggested. God, he was right. It was delicious and she was bummed they had to split the order, she could have had an entire one just for herself. She popped a second one in her mouth.

“You’ve got,” he gestured on his own face, “powdered sugar.”

He had motioned to the side of his own mouth, so she darted out her tongue to lick it off. “Did I get it?”

“Still there.” She did the same thing again, hoping she’d luck out, but Harry shook his head. “God, you’re a mess. Here.” He threw her a napkin. 

With a roll of her eyes, she took the napkin and wiped her mouth. Something coy about him getting it off for her was on the tip of her tongue, but she didn’t think she could have pulled it off. 

“Alright, you done?” he asked, referencing their food. Cassandra nodded. “I’ll bring these inside then.”

He brought their dirty dishes inside and told Cassandra she could sit on one of the lounge chairs or something and that he would join her shortly. 

She took off her green linen drawstring shorts and grey t-shirt and laid down on the extra wide lounge chair. Knowing they were going to hang out today, she wore the red bathing suit again. He seemed to like it the last few times she wore it. While she waited, she sent Allie the picture from her Instagram story, just in case she missed it on her feed.

_[Image]_

As she waited for Allie to reply, if she even would, Harry turned some music on the outdoor speakers. Clearly, he wasn’t worried about the noise or evading detection from her grandparents anymore. Just in case, she sent Nana a text saying they were heading down to the beach for a bit, but Harry had to change, when Allie responded: 

_oh my god, those beignets look so good  
i’m so sick of camp food  
WAIT is that him???_

Cassandra scrolled back up and clicked on the photo to zoom in. Sure enough, you could see Harry’s arm leaning against the table and half of his chest, but not his face. Thankfully, you also couldn’t make out the _West Ham Girls Field Hockey_ logo on his white t-shirt either.

_Oh yeah, there’s your picture I guess_

_i wanted a picture of his face idiot. not his hand clutching a fork  
he does have nice hands though…_

_What does that even mean?_

Allie just sent back an obscene emoji combination and Cassandra threw her phone in her bag.

As if on queue, Harry came back outside a few moments later. He pulled his t-shirt off by the back collar and threw it on one of the patio chairs as he made his way over to her. It looked like he had the same book he was reading earlier in the week in his hand, as well as his phone. 

“Good looks, Pressman,” he teased. 

She ducked her head and he bent down to kiss her, before flopping down next to her on the double wide lounge chair. “Are you seriously going to read right now?”

He shrugged and then bent his right arm to put it behind his head. “Yeah, I’m almost done.”

“What’re you reading?” He turned the book so she could see the front cover more clearly - _Franny and Zooey_. “It any good?”

“You haven’t read it? I’m shocked.”

Cassandra shrugged. “Not a big Salinger fan, didn’t like _Catcher_ when we read it sophomore year.”

Interestingly enough, none of the girls in Honors English much liked it, while all the boys did. That and _Lord of the Flies_ , but that was a bit more self explanatory.

“Not my favorite either, but this one’s good so far. You can borrow it when I’m done if you want?”

“Oh, thanks. I might.”

And then he actually turned back to his book and kept reading. Cassandra just smiled to herself and closed her eyes, hoping to get some morning sun. They laid out there for thirty or so minutes in companionable silence, baring the music that Harry had on and the sound of the waves crashing on the beach below. 

“I’m hungry, you want a snack?” he asked suddenly. 

Cassandra turned her head to face him and saw that he had put his book down. “We literally just had brunch.”

“Yeah and those pancakes were not filling. At all.”

“You know, they rip you off when you order pancakes at restaurants. It literally costs like sixty cents to make four of them and they charge you like ten dollars.”

Harry rolled his eyes. “I also gave you an extra beignet…”

“You did not!” He tilted his head. “No way!”

“You ate three, you just didn’t notice.”

She was a bit indignant now and sat up a little on the chair. He did the same. There was no way she ate three beignets on top of her eggs benedict. 

“I did not!” She poked his chest. It was warm. He was warm. And really close. 

Suddenly, he leaned over her. “Did too.” 

“Did not!”

“Did too.”

“Did n -”

And then he kissed her. Cassandra wrapped her arms around his neck, trying to bring his closer. They were both a little sweaty and warm from sitting in the sun, but it felt wonderful. He felt wonderful. Especially when he crawled on top of her. She ran her hands up and down his chest until she had to stop when he leaned forward. 

“You know,” he said as he kissed down her neck, “I haven’t read a page in about twenty minutes, I’ve been a bit distracted.”

Cassandra gasped. “Oh?” Harry hummed as he got closer to her breastbone. “Sorry.”

“God, every time you wore this…” he trailed off and kissed her just above her heart scar, sucking on the skin slightly. “Red bikini, literally every guy’s fantasy.”

She moaned a little and pulled on his hair slightly. “Well, it’s - uhh new. N-not too many people have seen it.”

“Hmmm, let’s keep it that way.”

His teeth grazed the sensitive skin around her scar and she arched her back slightly before pulling his head back up towards hers and kissing his neck and up along his jawline before going back to his lips -

“- Harry? - oh my god!” 

Except it wasn’t Cassandra who said that. They both froze and turned towards the back door. 

Kennedy was standing there staring at them, mouth open in shock. “I’m sorry!” she yelled before running back inside. 

Dimly, Cassandra was aware that Harry was still practically laying on top of her, though he had stopped kissing her once his sister made her presence known. And that her bathing suit top was terribly askew. Well, that solved the mystery of when Kennedy and Mr. Bingham were finally coming back. She wondered what would have happened if Kennedy hadn’t interrupted them. 

They untangled themselves and fixed themselves up a bit. Seeing how messy Harry’s hair was, Cassandra mimed fixing it and he complied. 

And then all hell seemed to break loose. 

“Harry!” a woman’s voice said from inside the house.

Immediately, his posture changed. While Cassandra could tell he was embarrassed about Kennedy - and Cassandra definitely was, too - he looked defensive now. Which could only mean it was one person. 

His mom. 

“Shit, what is she doing here?” he groaned. “Alright, be cool. Be cool.”

While it seemed like he was talking more to himself, Cassandra nodded and they waited for Mrs. Bingham to come outside. Like a cool breeze, Karen Bingham strode through the screen door and onto the back porch, lording over the patio and lawn below and looking decided out of place in the house that was still most definitely hers. 

“Harry, what the hell?”

He just stood there, so Cassandra spoke up instead. “Hi Mrs. Bingham, how’re you?”

Harry’s mom walked to the edge of the porch and slid her sunglasses down her nose, peering at Cassandra critically. “Cassandra? Pressman?”

“Hi,” she said again, dumbly. She had to physically resist the urge to shrink back against Harry. 

Mrs. Bingham shook herself slightly. “Sorry, Kennedy said Harry was out here with - I’m good, honey. How’re you?”

Cassandra colored at the insinuation and wished she was wearing something besides her bathing suit that was almost borderlining on indecent with how Harry got it all messed up. 

“I’m good, nice to see you.”

Harry rested a comforting hand on her hip and cleared his throat. “Mom, Cass and I have been hanging out lately. I figured Ken would’ve mentioned it.”

“ _Kennedy_ ,” she put particular emphasis on Kennedy’ full name, leading Cassandra to believe she wasn’t entirely fond of the nickname Harry had for his sister, “did mention something, I just didn’t make the connection that it was _this_ Cassandra,” she sighed like it was Harry’s fault. “Can you just turn the music down, Harry? Your father has a headache from the drive.”

He scrambled over to the lounge chair for his phone. “Right. Yeah, sorry.” The music changed to a dull murmur. Had it been lower to begin with, they probably would have heard the car pull up and avoided this entire situation. 

Mrs. Bingham looked at them both pointedly and Cassandra took it as her queue to head out, even if Harry didn’t seem to pick up on it. 

“I should go anyway, my Nana always needs help with the yard on Saturdays.” 

Harry grabbed her hand when she moved to get her stuff. “No, wait.”

“I’ll text you later, maybe we can go for a walk or something?” She squeezed his hand before letting go. 

“Alright,” he said. 

And then she threw on her t-shirt and shorts. This was not how she wanted to run into Harry’s mom for the first time this summer. Her opinion of her had already soured after what Harry told her last night, but Cassandra thought she was a bit more curt than the situation called for, especially since she didn’t even tell Harry she was coming or when - his dad told him last night they wouldn’t get back until at least after lunch. But it was like his mom _wanted_ to catch him in trouble or doing something he shouldn’t have been.

With a reassuring look at Harry first, Cassandra then turned to his mom and smiled. “Nice to see you, Mrs. Bingham.”

“You too, Cassandra,” the words should have sounded nice, but they were just cold.

As she set off toward the side gate, she could hear Mrs. Bingham continue to reprimand him. “Seriously, Harry -”

And like that, something had permanently shifted in South Chatham. 

\----------

Cassandra wasn’t totally lying. Nana normally did need help with the yard on Saturday, especially since her grandpa usually had an early afternoon tee time and only managed to cut the grass before heading out for the day. 

“Hey, I’m back!” she shouted when she got in the house. 

Through the screen door, could see Nana out back, watering the flower beds. 

“I thought you were going to the beach,” Nana’s voice sounded faint from the backyard and after dropping her bag off inside, Cassandra went out to the back deck.

“No, Harry’s family was back when we went to drop off the car,” she fibbed slightly. “His mom’s here, too.”

This got Nana’s attention. “Oh? And how is she?”

Cassandra considered this and hoped she came off as diplomatic. “She’s very _proper_.”

“I see.” Nana nodded and Cassandra had no doubt her meaning was understood perfectly. “I imagine she’ll want all sorts of family time for the four of them.”

That was anybody’s guess. Karen Bingham didn’t seem like the type of mom to go in the water with her kids or even make lunch to bring down to the beach. If anything, Cassandra figured they’d take their Christmas card while she was there and then would call it a weekend. 

Noticing Cassandra didn’t exactly respond Nana hummed. “Did she say how long she was staying?”

“Nope,” she popped the ‘p.’

Nana smiled. “I’m curious to meet her, she’s been a sort of phantom presence these past few weeks. What’s she look like?”

“She’s very _elegant_. Brown hair, just past her shoulder blades, dark eyes. She looks a lot like Kennedy, just older. Her pants didn’t even look wrinkled after the drive,” she added for good measure. “But I’m all yours for the rest of the day, what do you need me to do?”

They spent the next hour or so watering and weeding the flower beds and power washing the back deck after Nana said it felt _gritty_ the other day, whatever that meant. 

After a nice lunch of chicken salad sandwiches and chips on the recently cleaned deck, Cassandra got out her phone to text Harry.

_I hope we didn’t traumatize Kennedy or anything_

_nah, she’s seen worse_

Oh. That would make sense. Harry was the one who had a girlfriend before, not Cassandra. A boyfriend, that is. Not a girlfriend. And not that Harry was her boyfriend or anything. They were just friends, who liked each other. And went out on a really cute date. And made out with each other a couple times. Nothing official. Not like what he had with Kelly.

_Oh right_

_You’ve had a girlfriend before_

_no  
oh my god no  
we have hbo, she’s a big euphoria fan_

_Ahh got it_

So now she was just mortified. Fabulous. 

_so do you want to hang out later or something?  
my parents are going to a party tonight and i have to watch ken, but you can hang out with us_

_You sure your mom won’t mind? She didn’t seem really keen on me earlier_

_fuck her_

_Harry!_

_she was rude to you!  
and she definitely wanted to sneak up on me or something  
she freaked out about a scuff on the hardwood which should be the least of her fucking worries, all things considered  
all she’s done is shit on ken for her weight since she’s gotten home and made all these shitty comments about her bathing suit and for someone who was really pissed off about the music earlier she’s been real fucking keen for my dad to go to this stupid party later  
sorry, you probably don’t want to hear me complain_

_I don’t mind, who else are you gonna tell? Is your dad feeling okay?_

_he’s okay, he just doesn’t do super well on long car rides  
and it’s not like he can even rest tonight because they have to go to rob and mary peterson’s 30th anniversary party…_

_Ugh, how long is your mom staying?_

_just till sunday afternoon, good fucking riddance_

_Alright, I’m down then. What time?_

_8:00???  
we’ll probably get pizza and you can hear all about how awful field hockey camp was_

_Oh boy can’t wait. See you then_

\-----------

Cassandra showed up at five after eight after Harry texted her asking _where are you?? pizza’s coming in 10_. She was instructed to come right through the side door and idly heard the TV on in the background when she opened the door.

And suddenly, Kennedy was on her the moment she stepped inside. 

“I’m sorry!” Cassandra startled. “Oh - sorry about that, too. But I’m sorry for this afternoon. I was just surprised, I didn’t know my mom was going to make a big deal out of it. I think it’s really nice that you and Harry finally are boyfriend and girlfriend,” she said all in one breath.

That was a lot to process in about ten seconds. “Oh. Thanks, Ken. But we’re not - I mean, we aren’t like boyfriend and girlfriend yet or anything.”

Kennedy frowned. “Really?” Cassandra nodded slowly, like she wasn’t sure what the correct answer was. “Oh. Then why were you -”

“- Hey, just in time for the pizza,” Harry said, coming into the foyer and not a moment too soon. His hair looked like it was still wet from a shower and he was wearing a basic grey t-shirt and navy athletic shorts. “Hope you like pepperoni. That’s all _some people_ want to eat.” And then he pushed Kennedy slightly and messed up her hair.

“Harry!” She patted down her hair. “What the hell?”

He sided up to Cassandra, probably trying to get out of arm’s reach of his now angry little sister. “It’s not like you’re going anywhere and I doubt Cassandra will care.”

Being on the receiving end of enough, admittedly, stupid fights between herself and Allie, Cassandra steered the conversation to a new topic. “How was camp?

Kennedy and Harry groaned. “Can we at least wait until the pizza gets here?” Harry asked. “At least then I’ll have something to distract me, unlike the first _two times_ I heard about it.”

“At least you only had to _hear_ about it. Honestly, it was awful, Cassandra. Truly, don’t know how I made it through the week.”

The three of them made their way into the living room and got situated in front of the TV, while Harry pulled up the _Netflix_. 

“Alright,” Harry turned towards Kennedy, “you get fifteen minutes to talk about fockey camp, then you’re cut off. And you can pick the movie, but only if you go upstairs by ten thirty.”

Kennedy looked up at him, the picture of innocence. “And what’re you going to be up to after then?”

He smiled. “None of your fucking business -” The doorbell rang, signaling the pizza had arrived. “You have fifteen minutes,” Harry said as he got some cash off the counter and headed for the door.

Kennedy just sighed and flopped back against the cushions. “He always gets like this…”

“Like what?”

“Agitated, anxious, whatever you want to call it. Always when mom’s around.”

Cassandra didn’t really know what to say. “Sorry.” Kennedy just shrugged, like she was saying _what can you do_? “Tell me about camp?”

This cheered her up a bit. “Well, I decided that I very much do not want to play field hockey in high school.”

“What? Come on, Harry said you’re really good.” He hadn’t exactly, but apparently the field hockey camp was a bit exclusive, so it was a big deal that Kennedy got to go in the first place.

She rolled her eyes and flopped down dramatically. “I don’t know about _really good_. I got eight goals over the course of the week, but Ava Parker kept trying to show off - she was the only other girl there from West Ham - and she always made fun of me during the tours - those are these huge laps we have to do around the field, but like all the fields, not just our field - and she was really exaggerating how good she was to the other girls from Darien and New Canaan -”

Harry chose this moment to come back into the living room with the pizza and a stack of napkins, but no plates. “- Well, Ava Parker shouldn’t be playing right wing, she’s useless on corners…”

Kennedy preened at the slight dig at her enemy’s field hockey skills. “Thank you! See, Cassandra, these girls are just _awful_. And don’t even get me started on the lunch they had for us everyday, _bleh_. I can’t imagine actually _going_ to Fairfield University and having to eat that shit everyday.” As she said this, she shoved a piece of pizza in her mouth. 

Over Kennedy’s head, Harry and her shared an amused look.

“But,” Kennedy said between bites, “it was nice going in the pool in the afternoon and mom was only late picking me up once.”

Cassandra took a piece of her own and really wished Harry brought some plates over. The slice could definitely be classified as _floppy_. 

“I still don’t think you should give it up, though. I mean, I don’t know much about _fockey_ ,” she said referring to the nickname she heard Harry say a couple times, which got her a chuckle, “but eight goals sounds like a lot.”

“I mean, we played like two games a day, so it’s not that impressive…” she said quietly.

Harry nodded. “Seriously, Ken. Don’t let Ava ruin it for you, she’s just jealous.”

Kennedy blushed and leaned forward to get another piece of pizza. “So, what did you guys do this week - and before you say another word, yes I know about the party. I could tell the second I walked in the house.”

“How?” They both asked at the same time. Even Cassandra thought Harry did a good job of cleaning up. 

“I turned one of the picture frames around on the sofa table and you would have only fixed it if you cleaned. Plus, there were still some cans in the recycling.” Harry just shoved her shoulder. “Well, what else did you do?”

After they told Kennedy about going to Marconi to watch Harry surf, the party, playing golf with Cassandra’s grandpa, and the drive-in ( _you went without me!_ ), the younger girl selected a movie and everyone got settled into their respective seats on the massive couch. 

They settled on _Set It Up_ since Kennedy hadn’t seen it before, but wanted to watch it after hearing some girls talk about it camp. It was one of Allie and Cassandra’s favorites, so she didn’t mind watching it again, but she could tell it wouldn’t exactly have been Harry’s first choice. 

About twenty minutes in, Cassandra noticed Kennedy furtively eyeing the pizza on the coffee table and even hesitated to take another slice a couple times. Remembering Harry’s text earlier when he mentioned his mom commenting on Kennedy’s weight, Cassandra made a point to take a third slice of her own. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Harry smile when Kennedy leaned in to take another slice, too.

They finished the movie just after ten thirty and Kennedy went upstairs with only a minimal amount of grumbling and, after telling them both to enjoy their _movie_ , wished them goodnight. Once they heard her door shut, Harry turned to her.

“I noticed what you did earlier.” Cassandra furrowed her brow. “With the pizza. That was nice of you.”

She just shrugged. “I didn’t want her to feel bad about it and I remembered you mentioned something earlier, so it wasn’t a big deal. Plus I wanted another slice, too.”

“It was a big deal,” he stressed, “My mom’s been really hard on her lately, especially with field hockey and everything and I just don’t want her to feel bad about herself. And like I don’t really know what to do or say without making it awkward. It’s different when you’re a guy.”

Cassandra nodded. “I think it’s sweet that you even noticed it. And I bet she appreciates it, too.”

He blushed. “She’s my sister. Annoys the shit out of me nine times out of ten, but...”

She totally knew what he meant. Siblings were like that, you could make fun of them all you wanted, but when someone else did, forget it. “That’s like me and Allie, think it’s even worse when you’re both girls and only thirteen months apart, but she’s still my best friend.”

They just sat there for a few moments, side by side on the couch, their arms touching. “You think she’ll narc on you?” she teased.

“About?” Fair question, Harry certainly did enough stuff that his parents wouldn’t be entirely pleased with on a near daily basis.

Cassandra angled her body towards him. “The party.”

“Probably not,” he said after some thought, “but she will hold it over me, she’s really big on the whole blackmail thing.”

“And that’s the little sister in her.”

He smiled. “See? You do get it.” 

“How’s your dad doing?” His face closed off a little and Cassandra felt bad for asking. 

“He’s okay. Had a couple doctor appointments last week and they said he was doing pretty well, all things considered.”

“That’s good, at least he’ll be here with you and Kennedy for the rest of the summer, right?” Harry nodded and she played with his hand absentmindedly. “Hopefully, I’ll see him more, it’s always nice to chat with him. Plus, Nana would definitely love to have him over for dinner later in the week, something low key -”

“- Thanks, Cass.” He cut her off nicely and squeezed her hand. “Really, it’s nice to have someone to talk to about all of it. Ken said my mom and him got into it a couple times at home, glad I missed that.”

Cassandra nodded and leaned her head on his shoulder. He put an arm around her and pulled her closer to his side. “That sucks, sorry.” 

Harry sighed. “I just like it _here_. I like who I am here. I like how we get along here and how I can hang out with you and Kennedy and just how easy everything is. Like I can pretend my dad literally isn’t dying or that we’re actually a real family.

“And I’m scared it’s not going to be like that when we go home. Nothing is gonna be like this when we go home and that scares the shit out of me.”

That was Cassandra’s fear, too. Everything was so much easier here. From their little corner of Chatham, the rest of the world didn’t exist. Here, she and Harry were just two kids who found out they actually had a lot in common and liked each other, as opposed to what they were back in West Ham: two kids that fought all the time and quite possibly hated each other. 

“What’s the saying, you’re a product of your environment? I don’t think it’s necessarily a bad thing, though. I like being here, too. But we can take all the good stuff from here and take it with us, right?”

He looked down at her like he didn’t exactly believe her, but didn’t offer anything up to the contrary. And then he leaned in and kissed her, slowly and sweetly at first, until Cassandra wrapped her arms around his neck to pull him closer and they wound up side by side on the couch, their legs were tangled together.

Slowly, and with a featherlight touch, his hand inched under her t-shirt. Harry’s hands - make that his entire body - radiated heat, no doubt from the endless hours he had spent in the sun as of late.

“Is this okay?” His voice sounded timid and quiet, almost like he was nervous. 

Cassandra nodded. “Yeah, you’re good.” More than good. 

His hand froze at the edge of her bra and he pulled back to look at her. A smile slowly crept across his face as he pulled her navy t-shirt up higher. “You think you’re slick, Pressman.”

“Slick?” What was he going on about? And why did he stop?

“Did you come over here with an agenda tonight or am I just supposed to assume you always wear bras like this?”

Her cheeks flushed and she leaned up on her elbows slightly. Feeling emboldened by his comment and the absolutely adoring way he was looking at her and how good she felt at this moment, she slowly took her t-shirt off. 

To Harry’s credit, he kept his eyes locked on hers, almost like he was asking for permission to look down, until she managed a small nod. The cranberry colored, lace bra was not something she normally wore. Her typical, everyday bras were practical nudes and blacks, with the occasional bralette. This was semi sheer and lace and - not _her_. A total impulse buy when she and Allie were out shopping one day last spring. But she knew it had been money well spent after seeing the way Harry’s eyes widened.

“Gonna be a lot harder to focus in class now that I know what the student body president is wearing underneath all those smart clothes of hers,” he said while fingering the strap. His finger chased the edge of her bra from her shoulder to where the thin lace cups met in the middle.

The action caused goosebumps to appear up and down her arms and she blushed again if that was even possible. “No, only on special occasions,” she said quietly.

He gave her a quick peck on the lips. “Glad I count as a special occasion.”

Of course he counted as a special occasion, he was basically the only guy to ever make her want to be a special occasion bra wearing girl.

He kissed the area where her bra line started before taking one of her breasts in hand and cupping it slightly.

“I’ve wanted to kiss you here for ages.” He kissed her heart scar, reverently at first, before sucking on it to ensure there would be a mark tomorrow. “God, you’re so pretty, Cass,” he sighed against her skin. 

As she laid on her back, Harry slowly trailed his lips down her chest and stomach to the edge of her high waisted denim skirt. She kept shifting her hips and arched her back, trying to chase something, but finding it just out of her grasp. But it wasn’t fair that she was getting all the attention, she wanted Harry to feel good, too.

“Harry…” He tilted his chin to look up at her, his eyes wide. She ran her fingers through his hair and pulled slightly. 

He sat back on his shins for a moment, before he leaned forward and gave her an absolutely filthy kiss. Cassandra bit his lip - hard - and wrapped her legs around the backs of his upper thighs and used the position as leverage to rock her hips against his. She could feel how much he liked it and he sucked in a breath against her mouth. 

“Watch it,” he warned. 

And then he turned them both on their sides, so they were laying next to each other on the couch. His right hand slowly trailed up her thigh, closer and closer to her underwear, which fortunately did match the bra he was so appreciative of moments ago. She knew she was already wet, it would be impossible not to be at this stage, but the teasing was driving her crazy at this point and she wrapped her leg around his to pull him closer. 

“Harry, please…”

She didn’t care that she was practically begging at this point, she was just so thankful when his fingers slid underneath her underwear band and then teased her folds, dragging his fingers up and down, before he found her clit and rubbed slow circles against it with his thumb. She gasped in surprise. 

He continued doing so for a few moments and then slid one finger into her cunt, slowly at first, as if unsure if she would find it enjoyable. 

“That good?” 

She whimpered, though not in pain. “Mmmhmm.” And then he added another finger, pumping them both in and out slowly. She gasped. 

And she was so close - to something. The feel of his fingers, coupled with the weight of his body next to hers and the fact that it was _Harry_ that was doing this to her almost sent her over the edge. 

Until she heard a creak upstairs. Followed by another. She froze underneath him and snapped her eyes open. 

“Shit - somebody’s coming.”

“Wait, already?” There was barely a moment to take his comment into consideration because Cassandra’s suspicion was confirmed when they both heard footsteps treading down the stairs. 

“Shit, shit.” Harry pulled his hand away and they scrambled to get into a less obvious position. Somehow, she just managed to get her shirt back on and fix her skirt. 

While he leaned against the arm of the sofa, Cassandra cozied up to his side. It would’ve been kind of obvious if they sprang apart. And not a moment later, Kennedy came downstairs. 

“...So then Allie told me her friend fell in the lake - oh, hey Ken!”

Kennedy looked at them both suspiciously. They were both out of breath and flushed. The _Netflix_ screensaver was playing in the background, clearly showing they weren’t watching anything and hadn’t been for some time. 

“Hi? What’re you up to...sitting in the dark?” 

Beside her Harry sat there mutely. He rested his head against his hand - his right hand - before his eyes widened and he yanked it away. 

“N-nothing, just talking. We’re just - talking,” Cassandra stammered. 

“Okay,” Kennedy stretched out, “Well then, I’m just gonna get a glass of water and you can go back to _talking_.”

“Mmkay.” 

They didn’t actually talk as she moved about the kitchen, Cassandra was still too keyed up to think clearly. Next to her, Harry smiled wickedly before he slowly put one of his fingers - on his right hand - in his mouth and sucked. Cassandra watched, transfixed, until he released it with a _pop_. 

She bit back a moan. “Don’t,” she whispered. 

“Dare you not to make a sound right now,” he whispered into her ear and she almost let out a moan in surprise when his left hand slowly made its way up her thigh before he started teasing her again. 

“Har -”

“Uh uh, what did I say?” His finger slipped underneath her already soaked underwear and teased her entrance again. While she refrained from making any noise, her chest rose heavily. She was already so close earlier and now -

Over exaggerated footsteps marked Kennedy’s retreat from the kitchen. “Alright, I am going upstairs and am not making eye contact with anyone.”

“Goodnight,” Cassandra squeaked out as Harry pinched her clit. 

It seemed like an eternity passed until Cassandra could hear Kennedy’s door shut upstairs and she turned to straddle Harry. “You’re an ass.” She kissed him, hard. 

“And you’re easy to tease,” he mumbled. 

“I’m leaving.”

“Don’t you want to finish?” She arched an eyebrow. “We never picked another movie,” he said sweetly, “We really should finish.”

“Sure, the _movie_.”

“Could probably finish in a few minutes? So close to the end...”

“Harry…” He didn’t even have the decency to look bashful. “Well, what about you?”

His teeth grazed her ear lobe while his fingers slipped back underneath the lace of her underwear. “Hmm, I can finish on my own later. You though...not sure I trust you to do the same.”

Oh god. His words coupled with what his fingers were currently doing caused her to let out a gasp. “Please…”

He slipped one finger, then another inside her and gradually settled back into the pleasant rhythm he had found before they got interrupted. Meanwhile, his thumb continued to make slow circles on her clit. 

“Fuck, you really were close earlier.” She just managed to nod and a whimper. And she was really close now, too. God, his fingers felt _so good_. She grinded herself against his lap for some added friction, while her hands gripped his shoulders. 

“Atta girl, almost there.”

And that did it. She let out a slight whimper and felt her body go tense for a moment before she relaxed against him. As she came down, he slipped his hand away. 

“Harry…”

“Fuck, that was so hot, Cass.”

Was a _thank you_ too flippant? She’d never had someone else give her an orgasm before, but figured thanking them seemed too glib. Instead, she lifted her head off his shoulder to kiss him, almost roughly.

His hands threaded through her hair, which Cassandra found beyond hot, especially considering where they just were. Should she offer to get him off too? She had never done anything like that before, but she knew the basic mechanics of it. And she didn’t think Harry would really be too upset if he had to walk her through it. 

It would definitely inflate his ego a bit. It did happen occasionally, but she rarely let him think he had one over on her. 

She pulled back just enough to ask, “Do you want me to -”

“- Fuck - yeah. But you have to get home and I don’t want to rush that.” He gave her one last kiss and shifted his hands to her lower back, still holding her in place on his lap. 

She tried not to sound too disappointed. “Right, yeah. I mean, I wouldn’t really know what to -”

He froze beneath her. “- Wait, seriously?”

Cassandra looked at him incredulously. “No, I routinely give the lacrosse team blowjobs before their games. Yes, _seriously_.”

Candor was her friend at this stage - frankly, she should be beyond feeling embarrassed around him anymore. Not when she literally just came around his fingers. 

“ _Fuck_ ,” he groaned. “You’re gonna kill me.”

“Hmm.” She grinded against his lap, trying to tease him, while she wound her arms around his neck. “What time is it?”

Harry didn’t answer right away and closed his eyes when she pulled on the ends of his hair. She could feel how turned on she was making him. “Uhh it’s - it’s like eleven uhh something, I think.” 

Cassandra leaned over to see the time on her phone, which was on the side table to Harry’s right. She made sure to press her chest against his as she leaned over. 

“It’s five after.” He just hummed. “Guess I should head out soon…” Again, no response. “We’ll have to finish some other time then.”

“Cassandra,” he said almost sternly, “I mean this in the nicest way possible, but you need to stop talking”.

She smirked and slowly got off his lap. “You think you’ll be okay to walk me home?” 

“I think I’ll manage,” he said sardonically.

“I like when you walk me home. It’s always been really sweet of you,” she said honestly, which got her a bashful smile from Harry. “You should wash your hands, though.”

He rolled his eyes and promptly stuck one of his fingers in his mouth. 

“Harry!” Oh god. 

He looked at her assessingly before releasing the finger with a pop. “Hmmmm.”

“I’m gonna - go to the bathroom.” She got up from the couch and avoided eye contact as she made her way down the hallway. “We’ll - uhh go when I’m done.” And then she shut the bathroom door behind her. 

Okay, so she was kind of embarrassed now. That was normal, right? And it wasn’t his fault or anything. She just couldn’t believe she lost control like that around him. Looking in the bathroom mirror, her clothes were completely rumpled and her hair was messy from the amount of times Harry ran his hands through it. And she was still wet. 

But he was just so hot - and the _atta girl_? What the hell was that? It wasn’t unpleasant, far from it actually. Which was the problem. 

She was going to do some research. She was going to be prepared next time they did anything like that. Harry was - well he was _Harry_ about her whole never going down on a guy before confession. Which didn’t make her feel bad or anything - and she didn’t think that was his intention - but she wanted to be _prepared_ like she was about everything in her life.

She rested both hands on the bathroom counter and took a fortifying breath to psych herself up to come face to face with him again, no longer shrouded by the soft lighting of the living room. She could do this. She would clean herself up and they would talk about this.

When she found him a few minutes later, he was leaning against the kitchen sink drinking a glass of water. 

“Washed my hands, the full _CDC_ sanctioned twenty seconds.” 

She managed a smile when he twisted one hand around in the air for show. “Think that’s a skill normally locked down in preschool, but yes, very proud of you.”

He tilted his head towards the cabinet Cassandra knew the glasses were kept in. “You want some water?” She wrapped her arms around her sides and shook her head. “You okay?”

“Yeah, yeah. Fine.”

“Cassandra…” She got a first name out of him. Didn’t happen that often anymore. “I didn’t make you...uncomfortable, did I?”

“No, god no. I’m just - I’m just being - weird.”

He frowned. “I mean, you can tell me. I’m not gonna....”

They were still standing on opposite sides of the kitchen and she just realized how awkward that probably was. She took a couple steps toward him, but focused her eyes on the decorative bowl of limes situated just to the right of Harry’s elbow. 

“It’s just - I want to know how to make you feel that way, too. And like you’ve probably been with girls who know how to do that - and I don’t. And I want to do all that stuff, I just don’t know how and I don’t like not knowing.”

That made sense, didn’t it? Maybe. Her cheeks were definitely bright red, but she was pleased to notice, when she finally looked at him, that Harry’s were, too. 

“Oh - I uhh - that’s okay. Really, I didn’t do it for you to do something in return - like it would’ve been nice. But it wasn’t why I did it. I just wanted to.” He made his way closer to her and ultimately settled his hands on her hips. “Seriously, Cass. You’re in control - of all of this. You just have to tell me, sweetheart.”

 _Sweetheart_? She ducked her head to hide the ridiculous smile that spread across her face at the nickname. 

“You liked that?” She looked up at him and nodded. “Alright, _sweetheart_. We’ve got to get you home, I’ll be screwed if my parents come home and see I left Ken alone.” 

She chuckled and he gave her a quick kiss and they set off for her grandparents’ house with twelve minutes to spare.

They held hands on the walk home. And Harry told her about his many contingency plans if he saw his parents’ car coming down the street and had to make a run for it. It was nice and he definitely distracted her, which she appreciated. Luckily, they made it to her house without any incidents. 

“Harry?” They were standing on the front stoop now at the part where they normally said goodnight. “Thanks for making me feel better about all this and just being you, I guess.”

And then she kissed him. Sweetly, at first, then a little more fervently. He pulled back with a smile. 

“Night, Cass.”

“Night, Har.”

He stuffed his hands in his pockets and made his way down the stairs, a little spring in his step. Once Cassandra made her way inside, she watched him walk down the street until he disappeared from sight by the Alberts’ house. 

She made her way up the stairs to her grandparents’ room to let them know she had just gotten home - at eleven twenty eight, no less - and her grandpa thanked her as the _Saturday Night Live_ cold open started on the TV. 

Some thirty or so minutes later, she had just settled into bed after completing her nightly routine and texting Allie about her last night at camp, when she felt her phone vibrate. The message preview on her lock screen made her heart skip a beat and she rushed to unlock her phone. 

_managed to finish  
bet it would’ve been better with you though_

_Even though I said I’ve never done that before?_

_no that helped  
trust me_

Oh god. Were they doing this now? Was this going to be a thing? She blushed, even though no one else was around.

_What would you have done?_

_cassandra_

_How would you have me start?_

_really?_

_Yeah_

She could see him typing and deleting and typing and deleting for almost twenty seconds, until she received the message he settled on.

_hmmm i think i’d much rather have you on your back than on your knees_

She dropped her phone like it burned her. 

Holy shit. 

She would be thinking about that message for a long time, even if she didn’t have a response for it yet. Because she had never felt that way about a guy before. Never had the almost primal need to be with him and near him all the time. Like he would be doing the most benign thing and suddenly all she could think about were his hands trailing down her stomach or his skin pressed against hers. Or his body rocking above her as he whispered all the absolutely filthy things he wanted to do to her in her ear.

_Hmm might not be opposed to that either. Night Har_

_night cass_

\---------------

Unsurprisingly, Mrs. Bingham insisted on some mandatory family time on Sunday, so Harry was busy all day. Cassandra wasn’t too bothered by it. After all, they had spent nearly every day together for the past week. Plus, it would be nice to spend some quality time with her grandparents since she was leaving two weeks from Saturday. 

Nana decided the three of them would head up north to Race Point for the day and then have a late lunch slash early dinner in Provincetown. Cassandra had never been to Provincetown before and was honestly surprised at how long it would still take them to get to the outer Cape.

Race Point seemed like it was at the end of the world, even if it was only at the end of Massachusetts. It was pretty quiet, even for a Sunday afternoon, but Nana said the last few weeks of August were always like that on the Cape. The three of them managed to find their own patch of sand further down from the bathhouse and spent the day sitting in the sun, reading, and, in Cassandra’s case, going in the water for a bit - Nana thought it was way too cold and her grandpa did not go swimming. Ever.

Cassandra couldn’t believe she had to go home less than two weeks from today. It seemed like she had just arrived six weeks ago, no idea where the summer would take her. To be honest, she thought she would be bored after two weeks and would have to beg her parents to take her home so she could hang out with her friends. But she found that she didn’t really miss home - or her friends - too much. Not when she had her grandparents and Harry and Kennedy, of course. She did miss Allie, though, and was excited that her sister finished up camp earlier that morning so their call schedule could be a bit more regular. 

Harry texted her a couple times throughout the day, asking what she was up to and if she wanted to get ice cream with him and Kennedy later around eight. The Binghams were having a late lunch in town around three before Mrs. Bingham would make the journey back to West Ham. To that, Cassandra just said _quick visit_ and Harry replied _not quick enough_. 

While Cassandra was in the car on the way home, Allie texted her asking when it would be a good time to FaceTime since she just got back from camp. Cassandra had a feeling that this would not be a call she wanted her grandparents privy to, both on her end and Allie’s, and suggested her sister give her a call around six thirty. That would give her enough time to shower once she got home and provide ample time for her and Allie to catch up before she met up with Harry and Kennedy. 

And at six thirty one, Allie called. 

“Hi! I missed you!” Her sister sounded excited and peppy, but looked a little tired. 

Cassandra smiled and repositioned her phone on her nightstand. “Hey! Are you beyond exhausted?”

“A bit, I mean we can’t all spend our entire summer hanging out at our grandparents’ beach house, some of us do have to work, you know.”

They both laughed. “So, the eleven to twelve year olds, how’d they do?”

“Mellowed out a bit. But god, all they talk about are _YouTubers_ and _Tik Tok_ content creators and was it _exhausting_. I feel like I need to do a social media detox or something now.”

“What do you have planned for this week?”

“Becca and I are thinking of going to the beach a couple times, maybe even Watch Hill -”

“- Oh my god, are you going to go to Taylor’s house?”

Allie smiled. “That’s the plan. I’ve always wanted to go and mom always puts me off. Her and dad have apparently been working a lot since we’ve both been gone.”

“Yeah, they mentioned that a couple times. But seriously, I’m so jealous about Taylor’s house. I’ve always wanted to go.” 

And she had, but her mom always said Watch Hill was too expensive - what with the parking and then paying to get onto the beach, it was normally around sixty dollars all said and done.

“Clearly, she’s going to come out and invite Becca and I in to hang out with her and Joe,” she said sarcastically. 

Cassandra shrugged. “You never know, Gwen Patterson said one time she was there for the Fourth of July and she saw Taylor and all her guests on the back terrace. I think Karlie was even there.”

“And you believe Gwen?”

“Kind of? I guess. What’re you up to the rest of the week?”

Allie focused her attention on something off screen, probably the TV based on where she was sitting. “Uhh not much else. Becca said Clark’s having a party before school starts next Thursday or Friday since his parents are bringing his sister back to college. But Becca said there hasn’t been too much going on at home like that.”

“Like what? Parties?”

“Yeah, apparently Harry’s been gone like all summer and he’s normally the one that throws them or something.”

That Cassandra could confirm considering she just went to one on Wednesday. Had it really only been a few days since then?

“Ahh, right.”

Allie focused back on Cassandra. “Poor little rich boy, what will the local youths do without their king around to lord over them?”

Cassandra frowned, but didn’t know what to say in his defense that wouldn’t seem too obvious. She would have to get better at that. They started school again two weeks from Tuesday. 

“Anyway, how was the end of camp party? Was it like last year’s?”

At last year’s end of camp party, Allie discovered hard liquor for the first time and spent the entire drive home from New Hampshire hungover. Their father had to pull over three times for her to throw up along the highway. 

Allie leveled her with a hard stare. “It was not that bad, I’m a much more mature sixteen now and know how to handle my liquor with much more - uhh _aplomb_.”

“Oooo fancy,” Cassandra teased. 

“I’ve been making my way through those SAT flashcards of yours. Trying to take the March or April one.”

“That’s good, Al. But you’re avoiding my question…”

Allie scoffed. “Ummm you’re one to talk. All I’ve gotten about your date was a brief _it was really nice_. Though, tragically, nothing about if you shared a _sodapop_.”

“Fuck off.”

“Testy, testy. Alright, I will give you three details about Camp Boy if you give me three details about Cape Boy?”

Cassandra smiled. That was clever. 

“Fine, okay so one: the drive-in was really fun. I mean we’d been hanging out for all these weeks, but I felt like I really got to know him that night - not in the way you’re thinking, I see you smiling - but like just him as a person and about his parents and everything. And two: we’re going to the Vineyard for the day sometime this week, which I’m really excited about. And then three: his mom and sister caught us making out in the backyard the other day -”

“- No fucking way.” Allie’s face was priceless. “Oh my god, I’m obsessed with all of this. First of all _the Vineyard_ , my my how _fancy_. And then the mom and sister? _What_ are you two getting up to?” 

Cassandra ducked her head. “Nothing like _that_.” 

She wanted to put off telling Allie what her and Harry got up to on the couch the other night, it wasn’t really anything major, but Cassandra just wanted to keep it to herself for a little while. 

“Gahh your date sounds disgustingly sweet though. I’m happy for you, Cassie.”

And for a brief moment, she wanted to tell Allie. So badly. 

But then she remembered Allie’s snarky comment about Harry not five minutes ago and panicked. Allie wouldn’t get it. And if Allie wouldn’t get it, the chances of anyone else in West Ham getting it were exceedingly low. 

Her and Harry had to talk about it - what they would do when they got home. And they had to do it this week.

“So what’re your three things about Camp Boy?”

Allie smirked. “Well, he was in charge of the ropes’ course at the boys’ camp…”

\-------------

The following week was one of Cassandra’s favorites of the summer so far. Her, Harry, and Kennedy were practically inseparable. 

They went to the beach on Monday and Tuesday for the entire day - Harry skipped surfing both days, though Cassandra promised him he could teach next week - and they got ice cream every night. And Harry even changed up his ice cream flavor and got chocolate one night instead of mint chocolate chip, which Cassandra and Kennedy considered a win. 

Though Wednesday brought the remnants of a tropical storm to the Cape, forcing the three of them to spend the day inside watching movies - they made their way through all the _Iron Man_ movies, as well as the first _Spider-Man_ movie - the weather turned around enough on Thursday for Harry and Cassandra to go for a drive up to Coast Guard Beach and Nauset Lighthouse. 

And every night, they would either go for a walk or spend what felt like hours sitting in the Binghams’ backyard on that same double wide lounge chair. Harry hadn’t repeated his _performance_ from that night on the couch, but Cassandra was definitely getting more comfortable being around him. 

It was funny, he loved teasing her and stretching her patience to the limit, but he didn’t like it when she did the same thing, in turn. Or well, it wasn’t that he didn’t _like_ it, he just didn’t like to let her know how _bothered_ she actually made him. And always after she left and got ready for bed, she’d be hit with a flurry of _texts_ and god, that boy tested her patience in the best possible way.

But he never pushed her. And she kinda loved that about him. 

But she didn’t actually _love_ him. She liked him- a lot, granted. But she didn’t love him. 

Seriously. 

She didn’t. 

They had just over a week left. And she was going to make the best out of it.


	4. will you call when you’re back at school [i remember thinking i had you]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _hi! so soooo excited to be back with the final chapter and close out part i! i know it's been a minute, but i hope the 26k (whaaaat) chapter length and the rating's update (hmmm) will atone._
> 
> _but honestly, i hope you all enjoy this as much as i have and please please let me know your thoughts in the comments. getting feedback has been one of my favorite parts of this process and i truly appreciate it so much. i started writing this fic in the midst of a folklore haze and after i got back from vacation on the cape, so to finally close this out means a lot to me._
> 
> _x jordan_

_will you call when you’re back at school [i remember thinking i had you]_

“Oh my god, did you have to pick like the earliest fucking ferry?” From his seat beside her in the car, Harry threw his head back in frustration. 

It was currently eight thirty and they were sitting in the Wrangler while they waited for their ferry to cross Vineyard Sound. And, in Harry’s defense, it was pretty early. 

Cassandra elbowed him in the side. “I wanted to make sure we could do everything! And it’s not _that_ early, pretty sure there was a six o’clock we could’ve taken. We’ll get breakfast when we get there, I found this really cute place right in Vineyard Haven.”

Harry rolled his eyes dramatically and finished off his gas station coffee that they got when they left Chatham at quarter of seven. 

“I know you’ve gotten up earlier to go surfing. Plus, you really should get into a schedule for school.”

She hadn’t meant to send churlish, but apparently it came off that way. “Ugh, please stop. I still have a week and a half.”

Ten days, really. If he wanted to put a fine point on it. 

“Fine.” There was an awkward pause. “At least it’s a nice day today.”

The forecast called for a rare ninety degree day and it was already climbing well into the eighties before nine in the morning. 

Harry gave her a look like he couldn’t believe she was talking about the weather. “I suppose. It’s normally cooler on the island, though. But the beach will still be crowded.”

“All the more reason to get there earlier,” she said lightly. “I figured we could get breakfast right when we get there and then go to State Beach and then maybe go for a drive?”

“And I already called the restaurant, so we’ll eat with all the septuagenarians at five,” he teased. 

He had been tight lipped about what restaurant they were going to for dinner after saying Cassandra could plan the entire day as long as he could pick the restaurant. Though early, a five o’clock reservation would give them ample time to make their seven fifteen ferry, even if they had slow service. 

And so, Cassandra was a little excited. She had seen pictures of Martha’s Vineyard across her _Instagram_ feed all summer - it was basically New England influencer heaven. With its quaint towns, pristine beaches, and sprawling summer homes. 

But first they had to actually get there. And though they lucked out with being one of the first cars on the ferry and were at the bow of the ship, they were very much below deck while the rest of the walk-on passengers were up top. Harry said they could go up in a few, but he wanted to wait till the crush to get up died down. 

And since Harry paid for the tickets - she caught a glimpse of how expensive it was just for the car to cross over - she was planning on following his lead. Granted, _he_ wasn’t actually paying for it, he put it on his parents’ credit card, but it was still _expensive_. 

With a sigh, he spoke again. “You wanna go up now? Think we’ll still be able to get a spot along the railing.”

“Sure.”

They stashed any valuables in the glove compartment and took their phones before setting off for the upper deck. Once they got upstairs, Harry tossed his coffee in a bin and they squeezed themselves next to a family of five along one of the railings to try and catch a glimpse of the north side of the island. They were going into Vineyard Haven since Harry said Oak Bluffs was _a hovel_ , whatever that meant. 

There was a nice breeze coming off the water as they stood there in companionable silence. Since they were about halfway through their crossing, Cassandra could fully make out the island in front of them. It already looked larger than she thought. 

“Thanks for taking me,” she said suddenly. 

Harry smiled next to her. “We aren’t even there yet, you could totally hate it and equate all future opinions of the Vineyard with this one afternoon. And then I’ll have a black mark beside my name forever.”

“Who’s saying you don’t already?” She nudged his shoulder. “Anyway, it’s really sweet of you. We could’ve done something else, but - it’s really sweet of you.” 

Her hand rested atop his on the railing and then he intertwined their fingers. “Well, I heard you were paying for breakfast. Not everyday that happens, pretty sure you still owe me an ice cream, as it were…”

“Like I said, I found a really cute place online. You’ll love it, pancakes and waffles and everything.” He smiled fondly at her before he kissed her temple. 

“Sounds good, Cass.”

\-------

Breakfast went off without a hitch. They both got pancakes of some variety - chocolate chip for Harry and strawberry and cream for Cassandra - and with their bellies full, they made their way to State Beach. 

As Harry had predicted on the ferry, the hot weather drove everyone out to the beach early. So much so, that the parking lot was almost filled by the time they got there at ten fifteen. They hopped out of the Jeep and started getting their stuff out of the trunk. Cassandra recalled the time they went to Marconi together.

“I’m not stubborn enough to refuse help this time.”

“Hmm, we don’t want to have another spill in the parking lot, do we?”

“Shut up,” she teased, “or I won’t let you pick the spot.”

They wound up further down from the lifeguard stands, so it was a little less crowded, but they still had to dodge plenty of little kids making sandcastles and running back and forth from the water until they found a barren patch of sand. 

“This good?” She nodded and they seamlessly began to work setting up the chairs and umbrella and, of course, putting on their sunscreen. 

Harry maintained that he never burned, but his shoulders had been looking a bit pink lately and Cassandra wasn’t going to let him take any chances or feel the wrath of his father. 

They passed a decent amount of time chatting and then did their own thing, which in Cassandra’s case was finishing up her book, while Harry’s was staring out at the horizon and eating the heaping bag of strawberries Nana packed for them as a snack. 

Some time later, Harry huffed in his chair, seemingly trying to get comfortable, before he gave up and turned towards her. “You wanna go in the water?”

It was nice and cool under the umbrella, but she was definitely getting hot and the water would be a nice reprieve. 

“In a few, want to finish this chapter first. I have” she thumbed through the pages quickly, “ten pages left.”

He sighed and flopped back down onto his chair. It creaked under his weight. “Fine, read your boring book.”

It wasn’t like she wanted to read _A Prayer for Owen Meany_ , of all books. Like it was legitimately awful. But she had to finish before they went back to school next Tuesday. And she was so close to the end. She had an essay test the Wednesday they got back. Which meant Harry did, as well, since they were going to be in the same AP Lit class. 

“You haven’t even started it yet, still on your plan to wait till the night before?”

“I don’t want to do it,” he shrugged, “especially after hearing you bitch about how bad it is. I’ll probably just read the _SparkNotes_ or whatever online.”

She rolled her eyes. “Yeah, and you’ll probably still get a better grade than me.” 

“Think smarter, not harder - or however the saying goes.” He had a point, but she wasn’t about to tell him that. “Just come in the water with me, please?” he practically whined. “Come on, Cass. I don’t wanna talk about school - not now, not today.”

She put her book down with a sigh. The entire conversation had completely gotten away from them, it brought out _something_. _Something_ she knew they had to talk about, but both of them currently lacked the courage or the desire to do so. 

“We’re gonna have to talk about school and everything at some point, Har…” she said softly. 

He tilted his head, but got out of his chair and she did the same. “And we can, just not now.” Cassandra made a funny face, which he copied. “Right now, I want to do something else with you…”

“Oh?” He hummed in response. “Like wha -”

She could barely get word out before Harry wrapped his arms around her and kissed her. For a brief moment, it was like there was no one else on the beach until Cassandra heard some boy yelling at his sister for ruining his sandcastle and the moment was shattered.

“Alright, I’m not about to be that teenager on the beach,” he said after he pulled away, “will you come in the water with me? I promise not to dunk you.”

She swatted at his chest, but did set off for the shoreline, only to be slightly pulled back when Harry grabbed her hand. It still gave her butterflies whenever he did it. 

The water wasn’t too rough or too cold, even for late August, and they waded out until they were waist high. 

“Wish we had the tubes, would’ve been nice to float,” Harry said after diving under a smaller wave. 

They were pretty far out at this point and she could barely touch the ground.

“Next time.” It got her a smile and he nudged her with his foot. “Hey, watch it.” She nudged him right back, but before she could pull her foot back, he reached underwater and dragged her towards him. 

She wound up with her legs wrapped around his waist and arms twined around his neck. And while Cassandra wanted nothing more than to make out with Harry like a hormonal teenager, she was mindful of all the people amassed on the beach and around them in the water. It wasn’t like that day at Marconi or even any time lately when they swam together at their beach. There were a lot of people around and - alright, she wasn’t necessarily a physical person to begin with, let alone in front of other people. So making out with her boyfr - _whatever_ in front of what felt like half of Edgartown wasn’t exactly appealing at the moment. 

“- Can we jump off the bridge?” she asked suddenly. 

Harry scrunched his nose. “What? Like the _Jaws_ bridge? That’s kind of a tourist thing.”

“Well, I am a tourist. Don’t know when I’ll be back -”

“- Obviously, we’ll come back next summer.”

So he could talk about next summer, but not school next week? If he was so worried about them at school, why would he still entertain them hanging out together next summer? Did he only view them as something here? Was he embarrassed to be with her back in West Ham?

He seemed to realize he said something he shouldn’t have. “I mean, like if we’re both here next summer and all. Like now that I know you like the Vineyard, we could come back or something. But only if you want.”

“Yeah - yeah, we could do that. Next summer - if it works out and all.”

Harry nodded. “Of course, yeah. If it works out.”

The words didn’t sound the same when he said them. She pulled back from him and swam on her own again. “Can you believe this time next year, we’ll be getting ready to go to college?”

“Fuck me, no,” he chuckled. “I’ll be picking out my twin XL duvet and getting a laundry hamper before you know it.”

“Do you even know how to do laundry?” 

To be fair, Cassandra only theoretically knew how to do laundry - her mom did all the wash at home. Not that Harry knew this.

He pretended to look offended. “Obviously, I’ll just send everything out. Can you really picture my mom teaching me how to do laundry? I don’t even think she knows how to work our machine. We have a lady come twice a week and she does all of it.”

“Maybe she can teach you,” she teased. 

“Hmmm, Margie _does_ like me. Always used to fold my towels like circus animals when I was younger.”

That was beyond adorable. “Like elephants and monkeys?” He nodded. “That would make you a big hit in the residence halls.”

Harry smiled. “You think so?” 

“Might distract people from the fact that you don’t know how to do laundry - or cook!”

“That’s what dining halls are for, Cassandra.” He exaggerated a sigh and then floated on his back with his eyes closed. 

She swam closer towards him, but let him float unimpeded. “So, can we jump off the bridge?”

His lips slowly quirked into a smile. “You’re not scared something’s gonna _get you_?”

“Nope.” 

But he should have been. There was no way he couldn’t have known she was leaning over him, but Harry still yelped when she pinched his sides and eventually dunked him. Once he resurfaced, he shook his hair out and Cassandra started treading away from him, knowing he was coming for her. He eventually caught up with her, but she was totally prepared when he dunked her under water. It was an unseasonably warm day for late August and it felt really nice fully going under. 

“You gonna jump me again?” he teased after she surfaced. 

She splashed him. “Shut up. You wanna head in?” 

When she looked at her phone before they went in the water, it was just after twelve and she wanted to have enough time to go for a drive around the island before dinner. 

“Yeah, we gotta have enough time for you to jump off the fucking bridge, Pressman.” 

He swam ahead of her, trying to be nonchalant, but she splashed him from behind and quickly outpaced him in his surprise and befuddlement. They got back to shore and packed up their chairs and other beach gear relatively quickly and ultimately dropped off their stuff in the Jeep, before winding up at _the bridge_. 

After much whining on Harry’s part, it was decided that he would stay up top and get a _Instagram_ worthy picture for Cassandra while she jumped off. And to Harry’s credit, he took a series of excellent pictures, including her sheepishly looking back at him before she jumped off, her initial panic mid-air, and then her subsequent smile once she resurfaced. 

They then set off on a road tour of the entire island, with stops at all of Harry’s favorite places along the way. With the top down, _Vampire Weekend_ blasting, and the sun shining, they went everywhere. From the Aquinnah Cliffs on the east coast - which Cassandra hadn’t even known there could be something that austere on an island as gorgeous as Martha’s Vineyard; to driving by Chappaquiddick Island on the west coast - complete with a very crass Ted Kennedy joke from Harry; and the Gingerbread Houses in Oak Bluffs - which Harry still maintained was a _hovel_ \- they saw everything. 

And then it was time for them to head over to the restaurant for dinner. Harry had chosen a slightly upscale spot on Main Street in Edgartown that he always frequented with his family when they came to the island. Thankfully, they had gotten changed earlier in the afternoon after they left State Beach, so they were suitably attired. 

“So, what was your favorite thing?” Harry asked as they pulled up to the valet stand. 

She pursed her lips in thought. “Hmmm, I liked Aquinnah. It was really pretty, like all the pinks and whites and colors in the cliff side and it was so quiet over there.”

“It’s my favorite, too. Different from the rest of the Cape and the Vineyard.”

It was also the only place her and Harry had gotten a picture of themselves together all summer. He asked this girl, who looked to be in the midst of her own verifiable photoshoot, to take a couple photos of them and she more than delivered. Cassandra had no idea you could get such gorgeous photos out of an _iPhone_. There were a couple clearly staged ones, but her favorites had been the candid ones the girl managed to snap. 

And it also brought about another slightly awkward moment between the two of them, in that they both said how much they liked the pictures - Harry’s favorite had been the one where her hair had been a total mess and he was laughing at her, while hers had been one of the more candid ones where he had his arm around her shoulders and was looking down at her fondly - but neither committed to sharing them anywhere. Not to their parents, not to their siblings, and definitely not to _Instagram_. 

Harry was hot enough and popular enough that he didn’t have to post a lot on _Instagram_ in order to maintain his high follower count. The last time he posted was during the Binghams’ trip to Lake Como in early July. Which Cassandra knew because she looked at his account with startling frequency as of late. 

And because of this, she knew that if you scrolled all the way down to one of his earliest posts, there was a picture of the two of them at their eighth grade dance. He never deleted it. 

She also knew that if you scrolled all the way down to one of her earliest posts, there was also a picture of the two of them at their eighth grade dance. She never deleted it either.

But instead of posting one of the photos from Aquinnah, Cassandra posted the series of photos Harry took of her jumping off the bridge at State Beach and Harry, of course, didn’t post anything at all. It didn’t sit well with her. And not just due to Harry’s lack of action, but hers, as well. It brought _something_ unsettling to the surface. Something she knew she would be thinking about over the days to come.

Regardless, she was determined to make the most of the rest of their evening together. 

Especially because the restaurant Harry picked was perfect. They definitely were the youngest people eating at five o’clock, but it was quieter than it would have been during a normal dinner rush, so they could really talk. Harry looked good - as always - and was wearing a pair of red, almost clay colored, shorts and a white button down, while Cassandra had on a printed sundress that she would have paired with her denim jacket had it still not been inching near eighty degrees. 

Their waiter was sufficiently stuffy at first, but Harry managed to charm him and their drinks and appetizers were delivered promptly. To start, they split an order of spring rolls and then rounded out their meal with the lobster mac and cheese for Harry and the shrimp tacos for herself. 

It was the perfect way to end a relatively perfect day. They talked about their sisters and how the youngest siblings definitely had it the easiest. How Cassandra wished she could’ve played sports when she was younger like Allie and how Harry suffered through lacrosse and football for enough years in elementary and middle school to confirm she wasn’t missing anything. And then, as their dessert came, they talked about college. 

Harry leaned forward to skewer a huge bite of chocolate cake onto his fork. “So, why do you want to go to Yale so badly? Like I can tell how important it is for you to get in, but why Yale? What about it gets you out of your twin bed every morning?”

She thought about it for a moment, wanting to give him a legitimate answer beyond the stereotypical _I liked the campus and course catalogue_. 

“Well, my mom and I went up on a professional development day, so like all the students were actually in class and on campus and - how many college tours have you gone on?”

He scrunched his nose in thought. “Uhh like a dozen, maybe a few more?”

Same for her. “Okay, so on how many of those tours did you _get it_?”

“ _Get it_?” he copied her tone. 

“You know, like you just get the vibe or the feel of the campus? You could actively picture going to the library and living in a quad in one of the colleges, stuff like that?”

He nodded thoughtfully. “Maybe once or twice?”

“Well, that’s how I felt at Yale. I saw all the students walking around and going to classes and the posters for different societies and everything and I thought _these people are like me_ and I know that’s super corny or whatever, but that’s how I knew,” she finished lamely. 

“It’s not _corny_. It’s kind of nice you know exactly what you want. You’re gonna do political science, right?”

It was a small detail, but she liked that he remembered. “They have a really good program and a bunch of different concentrations. I think I’d do American Government or International Relations - I mean, if I get in.”

“You’re gonna get in, stupid.” He nudged her foot under the table and she nudged his right back.

“I don’t want to jinx it or anything.”

Harry sighed, humoring her. “Alright fine, where else are you gonna apply if you don’t get in?” 

“Oh god, there’s like five of them, I think?” She ticked them off on her fingers. “Uhh Brown, Amherst, Wellesley, Barnard, and Wesleyan for my safety.”

It was a good mix of schools, all within the tri-state area and all offering her major of choice. She had always had a sort of fondness for women’s colleges since her mom had gone to Smith, but Cassandra hadn’t liked the campus as much as Wellesley’s. 

Harry finished the cake and she belatedly realized she had only had one bite. She would get him back later. “Wellesley and Barnard, huh? You know they don’t have any guys there, right?”

She pretended to be surprised by this information. “You’re kidding? How ever will I get through class without being condescended to constantly?”

“Pretty sure girls can be condescending, too…” She nudged his foot under the table. “I know one who is on occasion…”

“Hmmm you’re hilarious. Well, where have you looked? Which New England campus will Harry Bingham grace his presence with next fall - besides Cornell, of course.”

He clicked his tongue. “Not New England, smart ass. And I also have Wesleyan as my safety so far and then I’ve been thinking about BC, Middlebury, Dartmouth, and Georgetown.”

Those all sounded perfect for Harry. Except Middlebury seemed a bit remote up in northern Vermont, but she knew they had a good history and language program. 

“No, I like those for you, city and rural schools - or well maybe not rural, but not like city cities. And almost no overlap,” she teased. 

They would both definitely get into Wesleyan if things didn’t go well for Cassandra with Yale Early Action or Harry with literally any of his other schools. 

He chuckled. “I’m contemplating purposely fucking up my Cornell app. My mom’s definitely gonna make me go if I get in, so might as well nip that one in the bud.”

Vaguely Machiavellian, but so was his mom. “Where’d your dad go? And what does he think about Cornell?”

“He went to Penn, actually rowed crew, which is pretty cool. We still have one of those machines in our basement and he used to go on it all the time before he got sick. But he went for business and knows that’s not really my thing, so he just wants me to be happy. He figures if he’s going to be paying at least 280k over four years, his kid should at least be happy going there.”

The stark differences between her and Harry’s financial situations was again pushed to the forefront of her mind. There was no doubt whatsoever that the Binghams would _not_ qualify for financial aid wherever Harry got into school. That fact alone would give him an edge anywhere he applied. 

And while not destitute, the Pressmans had worked hard to save for Cassandra and Allie’s college funds and Cassandra still knew she would be very contingent on financial aid and merit scholarships wherever she got in. 

“Did he go on a lot of the tours with you?” she asked instead. 

Harry nodded and a smile lit up his face. “Yeah, we did a lot in the spring and last fall when he was feeling better. We always try and do a lot of research on the best restaurants in the area and everything before we go so I can get a good vibe.”

“That’s cool, what was your favorite?” 

He thought about it a bit before answering. “Uhh probably DC? We stayed on M Street in Georgetown and like it’s kind of touristy with all the stores and whatnot, but they had this really good Italian place on one of the side streets that had the best bolognese. But like Georgetown wasn’t my _get it_ place like you had with Yale. Like I liked it, but I don’t really know if I _got it_?”

“You know,” she said lightly, “Yale has a really good history program…”

He matched her tone. “Do they now?”

They did. She looked it up after her and Harry first talked about colleges the day they went surfing. 

“Yup, lots of different concentrations and tracks - pathways I think they call them. And study abroad opportunities if you’re into that.”

He finished off his water before replying. “Are you into that? Studying abroad?”

“I’d like to, if I can. You?”

“Thought about it,” he said lightly. “Don’t know how well my Spanish will actually hold up in Spain, though. Might have to stick to English speaking countries.”

She chuckled. Harry’s Spanish accent had not improved in the five years they had taken Spanish thus far. He could conjugate verbs like nobody’s business, but he was a major liability whenever they had group speaking projects. In all fairness, Cassandra’s Spanish accent wasn’t that good either - they were both staunchly from Southern Connecticut - but at least she could roll her _r’s_ correctly. 

“Why history?” 

The waiter dropped off the check and Harry slid his ridiculously thick credit card in the book before replying. He hadn’t even looked at the bill. 

He shrugged. “I’ve always liked history. My dad and I used to watch those _History Channel_ or _Ken Burns_ documentaries all the time when I was little, it was kind of our thing. And my grandpa on my dad’s side was really into all that _23 &Me_ and _Ancestry_ shit and he did all this research into our family until he passed away. But I really started getting into it at school in eighth grade.”

That was the year the entire eighth grade class - minus Cassandra since she had heart surgery a couple weeks before - made the trek down to Washington DC for their graduation trip. 

“Ahh, the DC trip.”

“The DC trip,” he returned right back, “You know, I was the only one who wanted to go to the _American History Smithsonian_? Everyone else wanted to go to the _Natural History_ or _Air and Space_ ones, but since I wanted to go, my entire small group had to, too. Mrs. Davis had a soft spot for me and made them all go with me. And Clark was so pissed because he wanted to hang out with Caroline Cormier at _Air and Space_ , so they made fun of me for the rest of the trip. But it was cool and it was my favorite thing we did on the entire trip and I just _got it_ , I guess.”

She could totally picture it. Little Harry, probably in a polo shirt and chino shorts, triumphantly marching up the steps to the _American History Museum_ , his little boat shoes sliding on the tile floors as he excitedly shuffled from exhibit to exhibit. It brought a fond smile to her face. 

“In all fairness, had I been able to go on the trip, I probably would’ve wanted to go to _American History_ , too. Space creeps me out - don’t laugh - and I’ve been to the _Natural History Museum_ in New York enough times, so the novelty of dinosaur bones and dioramas has worn off a bit. _But_ you annoyed the shit out of me in eighth grade, so I probably would’ve sucked it up and gone to _Natural History_ if only so I wouldn’t have had to put up with you.”

He rolled his eyes goodnaturedly. “And yet, I still beat you for the history award that year…”

“Shut up, I was robbed,” she teased. “You excited for Euro?”

Harry conceded a nod. “I am, actually. That’s the only class I’ve done the reading for.”

This was news to her. “Wait what? You’ve already done it? What about all the _I’m not doing my summer reading till the night before_ shit earlier?”

“Yeah, for Lit and then Spanish, not Euro. Euro’s actually cool -”

“- Hold on, it’s literally a textbook? When have you read it?” The only books Cassandra had seen Harry read were that _Salinger_ book he read last week and, oddly enough, an old _Hardy Boys_ book.

“I do it before I go to bed?”

“You read a bulky textbook before you go to bed?”

He shrugged. “I have it on my _iPad_.”

“Of course you do…”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Shit, she shouldn’t have said that. “Nothing, sorry. I don’t know, I’m just - surprised.” He frowned. “It’s just, you’ve been talking about putting school stuff off until like last minute, so it’s just weird to find out you’re not - I don’t know.”

Thankfully, she was saved from saying another further by the reappearance of their waiter, back with the check for Harry to sign. As he did the quick mental math for the tip, she tried to sneak a peek at the bill, but Harry scribbled a number down too quickly for her to see the total before he snapped it shut. 

“Ready to head out?” He looked at his phone. “It’s almost quarter of and we’ve got the seven fifteen ferry.”

She shook herself. “Yeah, let me just run to the bathroom real quick. Meet you in the car?”

“Yeah.”

They left the restaurant a few minutes later. Since he wanted to give Cassandra the complete Vineyard experience, Harry took the scenic route back to Vineyard Haven, even if it added an additional five minutes onto their drive. They got onto the ferry with a few minutes to spare and, finding it less packed than the one this morning, quickly made their way up to the top deck. 

The sun set about ten minutes into their ferry ride, but the sky was streaked with gorgeous pinks and oranges for some time after. It had been a picture perfect way to end a seemingly picture perfect day. But as the Jeep drove off the ferry in Woods Hole, the clouds rolled in, creating almost an eerie scene over the bay. And Cassandra couldn’t help but feel a sense of unease. 

They had a week left. 

\-------

“So, this is where you’ve been all day…” 

Harry turned around and gave her a sheepish look. “Sorry, playoffs are on and I missed yesterday and Friday so...”

The soft murmur of the golf announcer’s voice made her look up at the TV critically. “I didn’t know they had golf playoffs? Thought they just had _majors_ ,” she said the word slowly, hoping she was correct. 

Between Harry and her grandfather she had accumulated far more golf and _PGA Tour_ knowledge over the past six weeks than she ever had the want or need to know. 

“Very good.” She smiled, pleased with herself. “But only half right, they have four majors throughout the year and then playoffs in August. It’s for like an obscene amount of money, too.”

She plopped down next to him on the couch. He was wearing a pair of navy athletic shorts and a grey UPenn Crew team t-shirt. 

“How much is an _obscene amount_?” she asked after he kissed her _hello_. 

It was probably what - a million dollars? A million and a half? 

“Fifteen.”

Come again? “Million? Fifteen million dollars?” 

He chuckled at her dumbfounded expression. “Yeah, and I think second place gets like five or something?”

She was too stunned to offer up anything besides: “Holy shit.”

He turned his attention back to the TV. “My guy’s winning, too. Normally has a bit of an unraveling on Saturdays, but he kept it together yesterday and is up by three, so -”

“- And you picked him this week in your pool?” Another unforeseen side effect of getting to know Harry better was that she was almost intimately familiar with the inner workings of the golf pool he was in with some random guys on _Twitter_. 

He nodded. “Yeah, two hundred fifty bucks if he wins, plus another fifty if he wins by at least three.”

“Well, what if he loses -”

“- Don’t - don’t even go there,” he teased, “then I’m only out fifty -”

“- How’s he doing? - oh, hi Cassandra,” Mr. Bingham said from the hallway before he sat across from her and Harry in one of the two arm chairs flanking the couch. 

“Hey, Mr. Bingham, how’re you?” She sat up a little straighter on the couch. It wouldn’t do to be practically laying on top of Harry while his dad was literally in the same room. 

He smiled at her. “Not too bad, you?”

“Good, Harry’s just telling me about,” she gestured towards the massive TV, “all this.”

Mr. Bingham nodded and looked at Harry expectantly, still waiting for his update. “He sunk a birdie on seventeen, but had a bad tee shot on eighteen. In the bunker now,” Harry said. 

They all watched in companionable silence as the leader finally made it onto the green to putt before the coverage cut to commercial. This time, Mr. Bingham gave Cassandra his full attention. 

“You staying for dinner? Kenny and I are making tacos?” 

Harry perked up at the mention of food. “Tacos?” His dad just nodded. 

“I can’t,” Cassandra said, “we’re doing steaks on the grill tonight, but thanks for the invite. And thanks again for having us over last night, it was delicious.”

Delicious was an understatement. Mr. Bingham had prepared a three course meal for the six of them last night - Nana insisted on bringing babka over for dessert to give him a slight reprieve. But the spread consisted of shrimp ceviche, strawberry and spinach salad, and a jambalaya that Cassandra was still thinking about twenty-four hours later. Kennedy made the salad and salad dressing, while Harry had the monumental task of setting the table. 

What impressed Cassandra most was that Mr. Bingham still had the energy to prepare all that food by himself. Harry told her he had his off days every now and then, but it seemed like yesterday was definitely one of his _on_ days. She only hoped they continued. 

Mr. Bingham smiled. “Course, it’s always nice to cook for people who appreciate it,” he directed this towards Harry, “you can clearly see how my love for cooking has rubbed off on some people…”

Cassandra smiled and nudged Harry, who was pointedly ignoring both of them. 

“Seriously, it was really nice. And you’re still coming with us tomorrow, right?”

The four of them were slated to head up to Marconi tomorrow to hang out at the beach while Harry surfed and maybe taught Cassandra some beginner moves. 

Mr. Bingham nodded. “I have a call in the morning, but I think the tide’s working in my favor.”

“You ever surfed?” she asked. 

“Oh, god no. Closest I’ve gotten to surfing was when I rowed crew in college. Got a scholarship and everything.” That was news to her. She had always assumed Harry’s dad grew up rich, too. “Nope, this is all Harry’s thing. And he’s good, too.”

“Oh, I’ve seen him,” she teased and looked between them both. Harry ducked his head, but she could see him hiding a smile. 

Then, the coverage came back on and Cassandra knew enough to keep quiet until the tournament wrapped. Harry’s guy won and after much pomp and fanfare surrounding the trophy and subsequent fifteen - fifteen! - million dollar check, Mr. Bingham went off to his office to send a couple emails before prepping dinner, leaving her and Harry alone. 

She snuggled up to him. “You happy?”

“I am and I will be even more once my _Venmo_ notification comes through.” He kissed her, nevermind that his dad was in the next room and Kennedy was probably about to come downstairs any second. 

“Mmm you smell good.” she said once he pulled away. “You just shower?”

He looked surprised. “Really?” 

It was different from how he normally smelled, but still pleasant. Less artificial, more _manly_. She just nodded and then rested her head on his shoulder. 

“No, I went for a run earlier,” he said lowly. 

Her head popped up. “What? You? Ran?” He just nodded. “I didn’t know you could run, Har…”

He looked put out. “I know how to run, Cassandra…” 

_Oh_. His voice sounded _stern_ as he said her full name. She kind of liked it. Liked how it made her cheeks flush. It also didn’t hurt that his hair was still messy and _tousled_ , making him look almost unkempt. She didn’t think she had ever seen Harry looking anything less than composed. Even last Saturday night. And yes - she had done some research about that, hoping she would be more prepared next time. Because she knew there was going to be a next time. She _wanted_ there to be a next time. 

“You know…” she inched her index finger up his chest towards the collar of his t-shirt, “I was thinking about the last time we were on this couch…”

He swallowed thickly. “Oh, y-yeah? Wh-what about it?”

There weren’t any sounds coming from the kitchen, so she figured his dad was still locked in his office. The coast was clear - for now. 

“Mmhhhm, remember when you said _dare you not to make a sound right now_?” 

Slowly, she started sliding her right hand up his thigh. She mentally thanked whoever designed _Lululemon_ men’s shorts for the lack of lining. 

His eyes widened. “Cass…”

“Dare you not to make a sound right now, Harry.”

“ _Holy shit -_ ” 

She cut him off with a kiss - bruising and frantic - and then she moved from sitting next to him to sitting on his lap. Normally, she wrapped her arms around his neck, but this time she slid her hands underneath his t-shirt. His skin was warm, whether from the run or sitting in the sun earlier that day, and his stomach was much more toned than she had originally thought. 

Meanwhile, Harry’s hands held her hips firmly in place and she grinded into his lap. She bit his lip as she pulled away before latching her lips onto his neck. He groaned and she shifted closer to him, if that was even possible. Her hands slipped underneath the waistband of his shorts, right by his hips. 

And, suddenly, he practically pushed her off his lap. She found herself sitting next to him, like how they were before. They were both out of breath. “Shit, sorry - I just…”

“Right, sorry.” She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. 

“No - Cass, it’s not your fault. It’s just we’re -”

“- in the middle of the living room?” He nodded. “Right.”

He pursed his lips in thought. “I mean if we weren’t in the middle of the living room…”

“Like if we were in your room?” Heat flooded to her cheeks.

“Y-yeah, in my room would be - good.”

That was a new thought. She wasn’t under any impression that her and Harry were actually going to - like they wouldn’t do anything like _that_. Not when his dad and sister were in the house. But she did like the idea of them being somewhere private, without the threat of anyone barging in on them. 

“- That is, if you want that?” She bit her lip and nodded and was rewarded with a kiss. 

“Hey, dad?” he yelled out to the empty downstairs, “We’re gonna go upstairs before dinner…” he finished with a slight undercurrent of excitement that Cassandra hoped his dad wouldn’t pick up on. 

But, of course, he did. “Ha, no you’re not.” The comment came from far away, but not too far. 

“Seriously?” Harry looked towards where the voice was coming from. 

Suddenly, Mr. Bingham popped his head back into the living room. “Yup and you’re about thirty seconds away from a _four on the floor_ request.”

Harry rolled his eyes. “Fine, we’re going for a walk.”

“Dinner will be ready around seven.” It was currently five after six. 

“I’ll walk Cass home and be back, okay?”

“Long walk…”

They both blushed and Cassandra cleared her throat. “See you tomorrow, Mr. Bingham.”

He nodded. “Have a good night.”

And without another word, she and Harry stole out the back door and onto the back terrace. He threaded his fingers through hers as they walked across the lawn to the staircase leading down to the beach. 

“You’re in for it now.”

“Oh?” she said airily. 

“My dad’s gonna give me shit for the next - oh god knows how long.”

She grimaced. “Sorry.”

“You’re not,” he teased. “But you know, you’re very surprising.”

“What do you mean?” 

Cassandra thought she was about the least surprising or spontaneous person she had ever met. See, Allie was spontaneous and Cassandra was cautious and deliberate, except where Harry was concerned, apparently. He shrugged and hopped down the steps a little faster than her so he was already at the bottom when he spoke. 

“You’re so - this might come out wrong, but you’re so _demure_ and _coy_ one minute and then you’ll practically jump me the next.”

 _Oh_. She blushed, not realizing that’s how it came off. It normally took a lot of courage for her to be so bold and openly affectionate with him. It just seemed to come so naturally to him. 

“Is that not - do you not like when I do that?” she asked quietly. 

“No, god no, Cass. It throws me for a loop every time. I’m used to seeing you as so methodical and deliberate at school, but over the last few weeks and even the past few days, it’s been really cool to see this Cassandra.”

She blushed. She had noticed a change in herself, as well. And it was nice, she only hoped she didn’t fall back into her old ways when they went back to school. 

“And,” he said loftily, “I wouldn’t mind finishing what we started on the couch earlier…”

“Oh really?” The way he was looking at her made her blush. 

“But I think the beach might be a bit crowded for that - unless you’re into that, that is?”

She laughed and swatted his shoulder. “Shut up.”

\-------

The surfing excursion up at Marconi on Monday went off without a hitch. 

Relatively. 

Harry and Kennedy got into a fight about who got the second best beach chair since they both decided that their dad should get the first. This normally was not a problem when they packed for the two of them, but Mr. Bingham’s inclusion on the outing meant someone had to get the creaky chair from four years ago instead of one of the two newer ones. Kennedy claimed the chair should be hers since it had her name on it - literally, she scratched her name on it with the pointy end of a clam shell - and Harry claimed as the oldest he should get it. This was, of course, solved with much pushing and shoving and eventually sand in someone’s bathing suit bottom. 

All of this was to say two things: Cassandra was glad she had a sister and the day was still very enjoyable. 

She kind of learned how to surf - Harry just told her to bend her knees when she finally managed to catch her literal one wave - and didn’t get sunburned sitting in the sun all day. The wetsuit may have helped with that, though - however, she definitely didn’t look as good in hers as Harry did. Small price to pay, really.

Regardless, the day was a success. But she was beyond tired waking up on Tuesday morning and as a result, enjoyed probably one of her last lay-ins before school started next week. Harry was supposed to come over for lunch and then they would take the day as it came. Maybe they would go down to the beach or go for a drive or get ice cream? 

And she had a surprise for him. Well, maybe not a surprise, but she had some news that would no doubt please him. Especially in light of their conversation on the beach the other day.

Once he came over, they decided to take their lunch down to the beach, as the sky had cleared up from the morning rain. As a result, it was relatively deserted when they went down around one-thirty. The only other people they saw were Carly Cooper’s mom and some guy fishing off the jetty, so they set up their chairs about halfway down to the water and were content eating lunch and reading their books.

“So, Jack McAvoy’s having a party tomorrow if you want to go? Think the infamous cousins will be there...” Harry said through a mouthful of the peanut butter and fluff sandwich he made himself.

“Like Surfing Jack?” Seemed like the most diplomatic nickname Cassandra could come up with at the moment. 

He rolled his eyes. “Yes, _Mr. Ivy League, Mr. Public School is for Poors, Mr. My Brother Got Kicked Out of St. Paul’s for ‘Forcibly Fondling’ Someone_ that Jack.”

The more he talked, the worse it got. “How did you let me talk to him?” she asked, vaguely aghast. 

“I didn’t know you were that _acquainted_ or that he would literally follow you around like a fucking puppy! I was watching you guys the whole time anyway - whatever, do you want to go?”

Cassandra made a face, which Harry mimicked. “Maybe - no, wait! I actually want to see his house. Think he talked about that as much as he talked about getting into Yale. Can we just stop by?”

He considered this as he finished his sandwich. “Sure, I haven’t been for a few years. My friend, Conrad, said that the pool house is un-fucking-real. Like nicer than my house unreal.”

“Well, then we _have_ to go now.” He smiled and picked up his book, some sort of mystery novel Cassandra had seen everywhere on the beach that summer. “What time do you think?”

“Uhh, like nine-ish? Will that be okay with your grandparents?” 

The dreaded eleven-thirty curfew had been a major sticking point these past few weeks. She never had a curfew before her and Harry started - well whatever it was that they were. But his comment was the perfect segue for her news. 

“Actually,” she said lightly, “my grandparents are going to a concert in Boston tomorrow.” Harry hummed noncommittally and didn’t look up from his book. “Yup, they’re staying over and coming back the next day.” This time she could tell he stopped reading even if he hadn’t looked up yet. “So, I’ll be all alone for the night.”

He laid the book cover up on his lap and looked a little too pleased with himself. “All alone, huh? Might not be a good idea. This isn’t exactly the safest neighborhood, you know?”

Their neighborhood was the literal definition of safe - barring any rich assholes with a Porsche flirting with a DUI. In short, Cassandra was not scared of staying at her grandparents house alone for one evening. But that wasn’t to say that she _wanted_ to be alone...

“You think I should have someone stay over? Keep an eye on me?”

Harry nodded with faux solemnity. “Oh, definitely. I know someone who’d happily keep an eye on you.”

“I thought I heard Kennedy had plans tomorrow?”

“Hmmm, see I was thinking of her older brother? Heard he’s got a thing for you, though.”

Cassandra ducked her head. “You want to come over tomorrow after the party? Make sure all the doors and windows are locked?” she asked, finally giving up the charade. 

“Yeah, that’d be nice.” There was a slight red tinge to his cheeks, but that could’ve just been the sun. 

“Good, you can sleep on the couch then. Don’t forget a sleeping bag.”

He chuckled. “We both know that’s not how it’ll play out. I’ll be blissfully sleeping on the couch and you’ll come out all _Harry, I thought I heard something outside, I’m scared. Will you come stay with me?_ And you’ll lure me into your room wearing your ridiculous matching pajamas and I’ll be susceptible to your charms since I’ll have just woken up and you’ll take advantage of my good nature.”

She scrunched her nose. “We both know I’m not that smooth.”

“I think your actions as of late have proven otherwise, Cass - oww, watch it, Pressman.” She had swatted his chest. 

“Uh-uh, you’ll be confined to the couch downstairs. We’ll watch a movie or something, just the two of us.”

That got her a smile. Yeah, they’d do that. After they got back from the party, Harry would sneak over and they would watch a movie and hang out downstairs. That’s it. Granted, they’d probably make out on the couch like they did the other night, especially if Harry kept sending her loaded glances at the most inopportune times like he was still thinking about it. But that would be it. 

Honest. 

\-------

The next day, her grandparents set off for Boston around two o’clock, with clear instructions and rules for Cassandra. Dinner would be at the Binghams that night - she heard a rumor about Chinese food - and then her and Harry would be allowed to go to the party, provided she was home by midnight, which in turn would be confirmed by Cassandra sharing her location with Nana once she got home. This was done, she assumed, so she couldn’t go over to Harry’s house. 

However, nothing was mentioned about Harry not coming over to her house. Mr. Bingham ran a tight ship, but he was definitely the type of dad to give his kids shit for doing something instead of actually reprimanding them, which was probably how Harry had gotten away with so much over the years. So, Harry assured her that they would have no problem sneaking off later and they would still be able to abide by Nana’s vaguely puritanical rules. 

After a nice dinner with the Binghams, Cassandra had popped back home to get ready for the party. Harry gave her an hour to get ready, which would enable her to shower and get dressed before they headed over to the McAvoy compound, as they had taken to calling it, around nine fifteen. 

She decided on a navy blue dress with thick straps that tied at her shoulders. It went to a ‘V’ in the front and an even lower one in the back, so she opted against wearing a bra. To complete the look, she wore a pair of sandals and brought a denim jacket to leave in the car in case she got cold. With a quick check of her phone, she saw it was nine fifteen and went to meet Harry outside. 

The Jeep was already running and he was fiddling with the music on his phone, but he looked up when she got in the car. 

“You look nice.” He kissed her on the cheek. 

“Thanks.” She looked down at his outfit - a grey t-shirt and dark jeans that he cuffed once. “Are t-shirts and jeans a party staple for you?”

He rolled his eyes and then threw his arm over the back of her seat as he reversed the car down the driveway. “Hmmm just in the summer.”

They set off towards the other side of town, coasting along Route 28 at a leisurely pace while _Harry Styles_ played in the background - it had been Harry’s selection and she distantly remembered him commenting all those weeks ago that he liked the first album the best. Once they got through downtown, her Harry turned onto Shore Road and they found a parking space a couple houses down from Jack’s. 

“Holy shit,” Cassandra said as they walked up the ridiculously long gravel driveway towards the McAvoy _manse_. “Think I may have picked the wrong guy surfing that day.”

Harry snorted. “Thanks.”

“This place is _massive_.” 

And they were just looking at the front. They hadn’t even seen the infamous pool house yet. The house was set back on Shore Road, thanks in large part to a massive hedge along the street and a sprawling lawn that eventually gave way to a three story colonial revival, complete with a widow’s walk that was wedged between two fireplaces. The white trim popped against the weathered shingles and the house probably looked gorgeous during the day with the dozens of hydrangea bushes dotting the property, in addition to the oceanfront views.

“It’s okay…”

They made their way around to the back where most of the guests - that they could hear from the street - had already gathered. The back was set up almost similar to Harry’s house in that there was a massive porch, which laid way to a terrace before a great lawn stretched down to the sea. 

However, the McAvoys’ was on a much grander scale and included an in-ground pool and - of course - the aforementioned pool house. White lights were strung off the house and illuminated the terrace below and a crackling fire was going on the fire pit, while there were countless games of beer pong and flip cup going on at once at tables dotting the terrace. If Cassandra had to guess, she would say there must have been at least a hundred kids there, easy. 

“Where the fuck did all these people come from?” Harry asked in disbelief as a bunch of girls in _Lilly Pulitzer_ dresses brushed past them and made their way over to a bunch of guys around the fire pit. 

Cassandra was similarly dumbfounded. “There’s no way all of them drove here - actually, pretty sure not all of them can even drive.”

Harry laughed and they made their way up the steps to the terrace to look at the drinks selection. The benefit of having a relatively small party like Harry’s had been was that he didn’t have to skimp on the alcohol in order to accommodate more people. Jack McAvoy, however, had not been that lucky. 

“You’d think Mr. Ivy League could’ve afforded better beer.” Harry held a can of _Natural Light_ between his fingers like he had just pulled it out of the Cape Cod Canal. 

Cassandra fished through the ice buckets and found what looked like the last two _White Claws_. “Here,” she held out the lime flavored one to him, keeping the watermelon for herself. 

“I’m not that desperate,” he teased. She rolled her eyes and moved to put the other one back, but was stopped by Harry’s hand on her arm. “No, keep it. Doubt you’ll find another one.”

As soon as he said it, a girl wearing a white crop top, that already had what looked like a beer stain on the front, and a floral skirt wedged herself between them and started fishing around in the bucket. Seemingly unable to find what she was looking for, she yelled over her shoulder. 

“They’re all out - no, check the other bucket - the black cherry, yeah.” And then she was gone. 

The two cans in Cassandra’s hands suddenly felt a hot commodity, even though they weren’t exactly her first choice. She slipped the lime flavored one into her dress pocket, not really caring how dumb it looked, and cracked open the other can. 

“So, where do you want to go?”

They wound up on the second story porch overlooking the entire backyard. There were a couple of other kids, mostly their age or slightly older, up there as well. It seemed like everyone had gotten tired of the fifteen and sixteen year olds down below. Apparently, they were mainly the youngest McAvoy brother, Matt’s, friends. Her and Harry chatted, making up stories about the people below for the better part of an hour. 

“You can handle your liquor pretty well, I’ll give you that. Don’t think I’ve seen you drunk before,” Harry said some time later. 

She laughed and nudged his shoulder. They were standing side by side, arms leaning on the railing. “This is literally my first drink tonight. I’ve never really been _drunk_ drunk, but I don’t think I can say the same about you, though...”

“I literally can’t recall one time when you’ve seen me drunk, you never come to my parties - alright that’s probably on me - but still.”

“That’s the point, _you_ don’t remember.” She pointed at him. “I’m always impressed that you somehow dodge the breathalyzer at school dances.”

Students were required to pass a breathalyzer if they wanted to attend school dances and other functions in West Ham. Even someone as pragmatic as Cassandra hated the rule, but apparently there had been an _issue_ at Sophomore Semi a couple years back, so now everyone had to suffer. Except Harry, apparently. 

He smiled, looking pleased with himself. “See now that’s one of my special talents. Might tell you - maybe.”

“You know, as class president, I could just ban you from everything?”

“Ahh, but you wouldn’t.” He was right, she wouldn’t. 

He looked around, trying to see if anyone was within earshot or remotely paying them any attention. “How much you think this house cost?”

“I mean, it’s probably a family thing, right? So whatever they paid for it way back when, it’s gotta be worth way more now.” He shrugged. “I don’t know, like a million dollars?”

Harry snorted. “Yeah, I don’t think so. Probably _a bit_ more than that…”

“Like two?” He shook his head and smirked. “More?”

“Probably like nine or something?”

Her mouth gaped open and she almost dropped her drink onto the apparently very expensive terrace below. “Nine? What do these people do? Jesus Christ,” she muttered. 

Then how much was the Binghams’ house worth? Or even her grandparents’ house? 

Next to her, Harry just chuckled. “I stopped asking myself that question years ago.”

“You know anyone else here?” 

He shook his head. “Not anyone I want to talk to, at least. Carly will probably show up if you’re looking for someone. Pretty sure her and Jack had a thing last summer.”

“Wait really?” Harry shrugged and knocked back the rest of his beer. “Isn’t she older than him?”

“Some guys like that shit - you’re older than me,” he pointed out. 

She never thought of it that way, but she supposed it was true. Her birthday was in March, while Harry’s was in May - pisces and taurus, respectively. 

“I guess so, but only by a couple months. Not like years or anything.” She finished off her can and cracked open the one in her pocket. The flavor wasn’t as good and it had gotten a little warm. 

“Hmmm true.” 

And then, like they spoke her name into existence, Cassandra looked down at the yard below and saw Carly Cooper, holding court with a group of five or so people just off to the side of the fire pit. A bottle of what looked like champagne was hanging limply in her hand as she laughed uproariously at a story someone was telling. And then she darted her eyes up towards the house and she made eye contact with Harry and Cassandra, who waved _hello_. 

Carly gestured for them to come down and Cassandra looked at Harry for guidance. “That okay?”

“Yeah. Think I’m getting sick of you anyway,” he teased and then pressed a kiss against her hair. 

They then made their way off the upper deck and down to the yard below. It seemed like more people had gotten there in the hour or so they had been talking. And they were definitely drunker than they had been an hour ago, the bevy of shitty alcohol clearly not as much of a deterrent to them as it had been to her and Harry. 

“There are my two favorite neighbors,” a clearly drunk Carly said once Cassandra and Harry approached. As she hugged Cassandra, the champagne bottle in her right brushed against her back. It was still relatively chilled. 

“I think I’m the oldest person at this party,” she said conspiratorially. 

Harry chuckled and hugged her in turn. “Pretty sure you’re the oldest person at most parties, Carl.”

“Shut up, Harriet. How long have you guys been here?”

Cassandra looked to Harry for confirmation. “Like an hour or so? We got here around nine thirty, I think?”

“Nine thirty-four,” Harry said wryly. “Pretty sure Cass got the last decent drink.”

Carly shook her bottle in the air. “That’s why I brought my own.” They all chuckled. “You guys know the group?”

She went around to introduce everyone, starting with her friend, Maddie, and then two other guys who Harry kind of knew from sailing camp way back when, Zach and Blake. They chatted amongst themselves for the next half hour or so and somehow, the conversation had gotten onto how to play _Fugitive_ and Cassandra bit back a smile at how animated Harry got explaining the rules. 

It was nice - being around people who had no idea what Harry and Cassandra were like back home. Who had no idea what West Ham was like because they, themselves, had their own West Ham. That was the beauty of having a summer place, you could be whoever you wanted to be there. Be with whoever you wanted to be with, like whoever you wanted to like -

“ - You ever played it, Cassandra?” Carly asked, jarring her out of her thoughts. 

She smiled wryly. “Once, it must have been sophomore year? I got tagged pretty quickly, though. Haven’t played since, but Harry gets like half the class to play sometimes, normally when a lot of parents are out of town or something.”

 _Fugitive_ was legitimately a very cool game. And while Cassandra was under no impression that Harry actually created it on his own, he definitely took it to another level that other people probably didn’t. In Harry’s _Fugitive_ , kids used their own cars and the games ran through multiple neighborhoods. She still wasn’t sure how there had never been an incident with the cops, but then again, Mayor Bingham probably had a hand in that. If only her jurisdiction reached Barnstable County - then they could’ve had a real game out there in Chatham. Maybe he would ask her to play when they went home? And Cassandra would actually get to play a round sitting shotgun in Harry Bingham’s car. His notoriously _fast_ car. 

She could feel a flush creeping up her neck. After a few more minutes of idle chit chat, the majority of the group dispersed, leaving just Carly and Maddie and Cassandra and Harry. 

“I’m gonna get a water, you need anything?” Harry asked. She shook her head. “I’ll be right back then.”

With a kiss on the cheek, he was off and Cassandra was alone with the girls. 

“God, he is so hot,” Maddie said once Harry had disappeared into the crowd. “Last time I saw Harry must’ve been the summer going into ninth grade? And he definitely hadn’t looked like that.”

Cassandra chuckled, a little wary of Maddie’s comment, until she realized she was joking. “Are you not normally around a lot in the summer?”

Maddie shook her head. “Nah, I’ve been a camp counselor for the past few years at a place up in Maine.”

“Oh, my sister’s a counselor in Maine, I can’t remember the name though.” Maddie rattled off a name that sounded vaguely appropriative of Native American culture, which might have been the one Allie went to, but Cassandra wasn’t entirely sure. 

Just as she was about to ask a follow up question, Carly’s face hardened. “Oh shit. Nobody say anything - hey Jack, Teddy!”

Even Cassandra could tell her voice sounded fake, but she turned around to see who had unfortunately caught Carly’s eye. Looked like she would finally get to say _hello_ to the host that evening. 

“Hey, Carly!” Jack said cheerfully, not picking up on Carly’s tone, before looking around at Maddie and Cassandra and acknowledging them, as well. “You guys know my cousin, Teddy?”

Only Carly had known Teddy - probably from the thing that she had with Jack last year that Harry mentioned earlier - and introductions were soon made. Teddy McAvoy was cute in a _do you know who my dad is_ sort of way, she supposed. All blond hair, green eyes, and tanned limbs. But his navy polo shirt was tucked into his salmon shorts and he was wearing this ridiculous braided belt that was just - no. 

And he was an awful flirt. While Jack had been a little cocky and woefully unaware of his privilege but still relatively nice, Teddy McAvoy was on an entirely different level.

He talked about squash for about five minutes straight, which considering they had only been conversing for six minutes was pretty considerable. Granted, Harry talked about golf a lot, but at least he knew when to shut up. Maddie was, surprisingly, enraptured while Carly was off talking to Jack. 

“- Yeah, our team finally beat Deerfield this year, think it was really down to my leadership as captain. But we were totally robbed in the championships. Like the refs were totally biased against us just because we were from the better school.”

Cassandra rolled her eyes and finished off the last of her drink. Then suddenly, she felt a pair of arms wrap around her stomach before her feet were lifted off the ground slightly. She knew it was Harry, obviously. Other than the fact that she could smell his cologne, she knew what his hands felt like on her and knew that no one else could possibly make her feel that way. 

“And what’s going on here?” his voice rumbled in her ear.

She turned around to face him and rested her palms against his chest, just by his shoulders. “McAvoy cousin, awful flirt. Think he’s got a thing for Maddie.”

“Ahh,” he looked over her shoulder, where Cassandra was confident he would see Teddy McAvoy trying - and failing - to flirt with Maddie. “He try anything with you?”

Cassandra rolled her eyes, but realized he was kidding. “No, at least not after I clearly wasn’t hanging onto his play by play of last year’s squash championship. Jack probably said something to him too since they both ignored me. Bit of a dick, might run in the family?” Harry chuckled.

“Well, just to be safe, I might have to clear up any misunderstandings.”

“Oh really -” 

She was cut off when he leaned in and gave her an absolutely _filthy_ kiss in front of Carly, Maddie, Jack, Teddy - everyone. It felt like no one else was around them, even the song playing in the background faded to a dull murmur once Harry wrapped his arms around her. Reluctantly, she pulled away, but not before biting his lip slightly. 

“This going to be a thing? You swooping in and _saving me_ from the McAvoy family?” She wasn’t upset with him, frankly she had been relieved when he came over, but she wanted to tease him a bit. 

He scoffed. “Guys like that are assholes. Probably plays devil's advocate in class all the time and drives a Jeep and wears boat shoes - and yes, I am aware that sounds exactly like me, but -”

“- Curious to see where you’re going with this - but…”

“- But guys like that don’t have the first clue how to handle a girl like you, they’d make it all about themselves.” 

They were by themselves a bit now, Carly and Maddie had gone off somewhere - Cassandra didn’t know where nor did she particularly care. Not after where her mind just went after Harry’s comment. And where it had consistently been straying to as of late. 

“Well,” she said slowly, “what if I want to make it all about _you_?” 

He furrowed his brow in thought. “What do you mean -” 

And then, before he could finish, Cassandra pulled him through a crowd of people and towards the pool house the two of them had joked about all night. It did look impressive, even more so up close. Just the pool house, itself, had to have been almost three quarters of the size of her grandparents’ _house_. It even had window boxes and copper gutters. _Copper gutters_. 

They wound up around the back, completely shrouded from view. Around them, you could hear the dull chatter from the party, as well as the bass of a song Cassandra didn’t recognize thumping through the night and the waves crashing on the rocks below. It was dark, but she could still make out how confused Harry looked. In one quick motion, she put her hands on both sides of his head and kissed him. It took him a moment to respond - she had been briefly worried if she had overstepped or something - and then he wrapped his arms around her tightly. 

“Do you think anyone will come back here?” She played with the ends of his hair. 

His chest rose up and down like he was already out of breath. “Umm p-probably not. Why?”

“I want to try something, but you’re gonna have to help me...” 

At first he looked confused again and she almost wished she hadn’t said anything. But then his eyes widened and he gulped and she knew he _knew_. 

“Cassandra…” he warned. 

She leaned back and trailed her fingers down his chest, slowly, and stopped right at the waistband of his jeans. But Harry put his hand over hers before she could go any further. 

“What?” Their eyes locked. “Did I - do you not want me to?” 

He shook his head. “No, god - no, you’re good. I just want to make sure that you want to do this, like you’re not just doing it because -”

“-No, I want to,” she said firmly. “But I was being serious, you’ll have to tell me if I’m doing it right.”

He smiled. “So, you want me to boss you aro - fuck’s sake, Cass,” he stuttered out once she palmed him through his jeans. 

“Watch it.”

Slowly, she dragged her lips along his neck up to his jawline, making sure to slightly graze her teeth against his skin. He didn’t have a belt on, so she went straight for the button and zipper on his jeans. He was already practically straining against the denim and he let out a low hiss when her hand grazed against him over his boxers. They were navy and white gingham, which was kind of cute. 

“O-okay, you can start by strok - fuck this is a very fine line between hot and awkward.”

She huffed out a laugh in spite of herself and Harry did the same. “Sorry…”

“Don’t be, it felt good. Just don’t wanna come from a hand job. Here -” His large hand enveloped hers and he guided it over his dick. Up and down, up and down, slowly, until he removed his hand, so it was just her own.

“H-how’s that?” she asked tentatively. 

He let out a sort of half sigh, half moan. “It’s - uhh good.”

To be honest, she found the whole thing completely fascinating. With just a twist or squeeze of her hand, she could send him entirely over the edge. And god, the face he was making? She bit her lip - hard. 

Without breaking eye contact, she sunk down on her knees in front of him. The grass felt cold and wet beneath her, but she and Harry were completely out of sight from any drunken party guests thanks to the large hydrangea bush to their left. 

“Let me know if you wanna stop or anything - and like you can use your hands along with your mouth, too. Just whatever you feel comfortable with - _fuck_.”

The curse slipped out as she took him in her mouth. 

It was different and a bit odd at first. Her first thought, beyond the obvious _oh wow Harry James Bingham_ , was why girls actually liked doing this, but then Harry walked her through it the best he could and she _got it_. 

She really _got it_. 

He trailed off a couple times, so she had to assume she was doing the right thing. She tried to remember things she had read or what the girls on that ridiculous podcast Allie always listened to had said, but eventually she just stopped overthinking it and went with her gut. 

But what she really liked and what turned _her_ on was how much Harry liked it and appreciated it. How he threaded his hands through her hair, occasionally pulling at the roots. Or the way his voice sounded as he told her what to do - _just like that Cass_ \- almost choked or broken like he was just barely hanging on. And god - the _eye contact_. 

There were even a couple times when she could tell he was trying desperately to hold back and keep his hips relatively still, but he couldn’t quite manage. He had just barely managed to ask her if she wanted to swallow or not - she went for it. It was a lot - her eyes watered a little bit - but with one final, _fuck, Cass_ it was over. 

“H-how was that?” 

She was still on her knees in front of him and her neck almost hurt from how far back she had to tilt it to meet his eyes. But her legs felt like jelly, so she didn’t think she could stand just yet. She licked her lips and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. It was an interesting taste. Not _bad_ \- just different. 

Meanwhile, Harry leaned his head back against the pool house and let out a deep breath. 

“That was uhh -” he paused to collect himself and swallowed heavily, before he looked down at her, “- that was really good. You did uhh - a good job.”

Her chest heaved slightly and her jaw felt a little funny, but she smiled up at him.

No sooner had Harry fastened his jeans again, did he pull her up by the arms so they were face to face. Then, he spun her around so she was pressed against the pool house. The shingles felt rough against her back as he leaned into her, but it still felt good. He bent down slightly and ran his hands up and down the backs of her thighs and ultimately picked her up, using the pool house as leverage to hold her in place. Her legs wrapped around his hips and she could feel how turned on he was again. She let out a groan. 

“God, I want you so bad right now.” She tilted her head back against the shingles and Harry pressed sloppy kisses against her neck. “You did such a good job, sweetheart.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, you should listen to me more often,” he teased.

She giggled, but was abruptly cut off when he kissed her. That was a surprise. She didn’t think guys liked that - kissing you on the mouth after you went down on them - but Harry didn’t seem to care.

“I don’t - I don’t know about that,” she said once he directed his attention back to her neck and the part of her chest that wasn’t covered by her dress. There would definitely be a mark tomorrow. Or two. Maybe more. 

His voice rumbled against her chest, “Well, I’ll be thinking about it for a long time.” 

She couldn’t be sure how long they made out against Jack McAvoy’s pool house. It could have been five minutes or forty five minutes, she honestly didn’t care. For once in Cassandra Pressman’s life, she didn’t care about what anyone else was doing. All she could think about was Harry and how fucking _good_ it felt being there with him in that exact moment in time. 

Hearing him tell her how _fucking hot_ it was when she went down on him or how _soft her skin felt underneath her dress_ or even how _badly he wanted her_. It was practically euphoric. And in a moment of clarity that she would never - even after all this was over - blame on the two _White Claws_ she had earlier, she spoke up. 

“Wait- ” He stopped right away. “I want to have sex,” she said suddenly. 

Harry’s hands stilled on her hips, where they had slowly been inching up her dress. “Wha-what?”

“I want to have sex. With you.” 

His grip lessened significantly and she put her feet on the ground again, though she kept her arms wrapped around his neck. Had she been too bold - or worse, awkward?

“Like right now?” His voice sounded hoarse. 

She blushed. “No, not like this second. But maybe we could leave early, I mean we were always kind of leading towards this with my grandparents being out...”

“Okay, c-cool. Yeah, that would make sense. You probably don’t want to be pressed against a pool house with a backyard full of drunk seventeen year olds for that.”

In spite of herself, Cassandra giggled. “Umm that’s exactly how I imagined it.”

Harry regained some of his composure. “Thought about this a lot have you?”

“I mean, not specifically no. But I have to admit that I figured a bed or at least the backseat of a car or even a couch factored in there somewhere.”

“Whatever you want, Cass.”

\-------

They did an Irish Exit, abstaining from goodbyes before walking hand in hand out of the McAvoys’ backyard to the Wrangler. Harry had a beer right when they had gotten to Jack’s and had only nursed it all evening, so he was perfectly able to drive and the buzz Cassandra had earlier in the evening had completely passed. They were stone cold sober. 

But the twenty minute drive along Route 28 back to her grandparents’ house seemed to drag on. Beside her, Harry seemed relatively at ease, even if he drove a little faster than normal. He bounced his knee at the stoplights and fiddled with the radio a couple times, but chatted mindlessly about the party while Cassandra offered some perfunctory responses of her own. 

She knew that this entire thing was going to be awkward. At least the build up to it would be. Losing your virginity to someone was bound to be awkward. But that wasn’t all it had to be. It could be really sweet and nice and fun if she let it. 

She trusted Harry. 

She liked Harry. 

She wanted Harry - 

“- Fuck,” he said suddenly and Cassandra turned to look at him. “I don’t think I have any condoms.”

The abruptness made her snort. “Sorry, that wasn’t funny.” And then she properly started laughing, contradicting herself. 

Harry looked at her like she was crazy before ultimately joining in, albeit with a little less enthusiasm. “You’re so weird,” he joked. 

She pretended to look affronted. “Just surprised me, I was totally zoning out.”

He smiled and looked in his mirrors before banging a uey, seemingly to go back to the _Cumberland Farms_ they passed a few minutes ago. “Well, I’m glad I remembered now as opposed to twenty minutes from now…”

The parking lot was devoid of any other cars at eleven twenty-three and Harry didn’t even turn the car off after putting it into park. 

“I’ll be right back,” he said before hopping out. 

And he was. Cassandra barely made it through her _Instagram_ feed and talked herself out of texting Allie three times before he came back outside and got back into the car. 

“God, would’ve killed for self check out. Here.” 

He tossed the plastic bag onto her lap. Inside was a light blue _Gatorade_ and a bag of _Peanut M &Ms_, in addition to the box of condoms. She ignored those for now and instead took the candy out of the bag and ripped the package open. 

“All for me?” she teased. 

Harry snorted. “Felt weird just buying them. I was the only person in there and the cashier was this old lady who was very clearly judging me - on second thought, give me a sip of the _Gatorade_.”

She cracked open the bottle and handed it to him. After he handed it back over, they continued on their way again and headed back to the house. An old _Eagles_ song played on the radio since Harry hadn’t thought to plug his phone in. 

“So…” 

“So…” he returned, matching her tone.

She angled herself towards him. “Will your dad notice if you don’t come home for a while?”

“A while?” She shot him a look. “No, he won’t notice. He normally takes an _Ambien_ around ten.”

“What about the car?”

They were at a stoplight, so Harry briefly took his eyes off the road to look at her. “You really think of everything don’t you?”

Boy, did she ever. Sometimes to the point of insanity. 

She shoved his shoulder. “Shut up.”

“Excuse me, I am trying to drive.” He gestured to the street and pointedly accelerated once the light changed to green. 

Ignoring him completely, she said: “You could drop me off and then drop the car off at yours and walk back?”

It was a good idea. And it would also give her some time to freshen up and make sure she didn’t have anything embarrassing laying around her room. 

And Harry agreed readily. “Yeah, that works - what was your codename the other day?”

She laughed, thinking of when they snuck around that first day after the party. “You were _Falcon 2_ for some ridiculous reason and I was -” 

“- _Smarty Pants_ because you’re so fucking smart and you let me know at every opportunity.”

They turned down their street. “You were the one who picked them…”

“And I can just as easily give you another one…”

The street was quiet, no other cars or people in sight, as the Jeep rolled to a stop in front of her grandparents’ house. Harry put the car into park and rested his arm on the back of her seat. 

“So…”

She turned towards him. “Text me when you’re outside and I’ll let you in, okay?”

“Okay.” He leaned in to kiss her, like he wouldn’t see her again for hours, as opposed to five minutes. “See you soon.”

Begrudgingly, she pulled back and got out of the car. “See you soon.”

As always, he waited until she got inside and flicked on the hall light before driving away. And then she ran to her room, taking the stairs two at a time. Thankfully, she always made her bed and Nana insisted she keep her room relatively tidy, so there wasn’t much in the way to clean up, but she did a quick once over anyway. After dropping off her bag and phone - and sharing her location with Nana - she went to the bathroom, and then brushed her hair and teeth again. 

It couldn’t have been more than ten minutes since Harry dropped her off when she got the text. 

_here_

Like earlier, she took the stairs practically two at a time and raced to the front door. And there he stood, chest heaving, looking like he had just run from his house. 

“Made good time -” he said before she threw her arms around his neck and kissed him, right there on the front stoop. 

“Jesus, you gonna let me inside first?” he asked finally when she pulled away for a moment. 

“Sorry.”

She wasn’t - at all - but happily moved aside to let him in and had just locked the door before he was on her again. Her back bumped against the front door and she could feel him smiling against her lips. 

“Did you just brush your teeth? You taste minty,” he asked as he kissed along her jawline. 

“So do you.” He pulled back and scoffed. A smile broke out across her face.

He blushed. “Come on,” he pulled her into his arms, “you wanna go upstairs?”

“Yeah.”

She led the way up the stairs and Harry trailed behind her slightly. 

“You know,” he said casually once they got to the landing and turned down the hallway towards Cassandra’s room, “I’ve never been up here before…”

“Well, I would hope not. Not unless there’s something I should know about you and Nana…” He exaggerated a grimace, but filed into the room after her. 

The door closed soundly behind him. 

She put her back to her bed and turned to face Harry. He was looking around her room, assessingly. There wasn’t much in the way of personal mementos or trinkets. Not like her room back in West Ham. This bedroom, with its patterned quilt and bright woven rug and accent chair, looked like something out of a _Serena and Lily_ catalog. 

But suddenly, the once cozy room felt too large. Like they were standing miles apart from each other, as opposed to a couple feet. Cassandra took two large steps towards Harry until she was right in front of him. He responded in kind and wrapped his arms around her waist before leaning in to kiss her. They got lost in each other for a few moments.

“Har?” He hummed against her neck. “You know, I’ve never done anything like this before, right?” she said quietly. 

He must have sensed something in her tone because he leaned back to look her directly in the eye. “I know,” he said, not unkindly. “That’s why I’m nervous.”

“You’re nervous?” He shrugged his shoulders, but continued making circles on her hips with his thumbs. “But you’ve had sex before.”

“Yeah, but I’m not like a _savant_ or anything and like - it’s your first time,” he whispered the last part, like speaking at a normal volume would scare her off. 

“Then I probably won’t notice if it’s not mind blowing or anything. Don’t have much to compare it to,” she tried to joke. He just groaned. “Wait, you’re like actually nervous.”

He blushed. “And you’re not?”

“I mean, a little. But I’ve known you forever, Harry. And I’m happy it’s you.”

Because she trusted him and she knew he’d make her feel good and safe. And that fact that he was so nervous was beyond sweet. Her confession earned her a smile. 

“Then we’ll take it slow. Whatever you want, you just gotta tell me if you want me to stop, alright?”

She wrapped her arms around his neck. “Okay.”

“Good.”

They started kissing again and Cassandra found herself against the bedroom wall with her arms wrapped around Harry’s neck, just so the ends of his hair were brushing against her fingertips. His knee slipped between her legs, spreading them slightly. As her bare feet slid on the wood floor, her toes brushed against his still sneaker clad foot. 

“Wait.” He stopped. “You have to take your shoes off. I should’ve had you do that downstairs.”

He smiled goodnaturedly and made a big show of stepping back to untie his white high tops, before setting them on the floor by the foot of her bed. And for good measure, he put his wallet and phone on her nightstand, too. 

“Anything else?” She shook her head, but walked towards him. “Now, I’ve been wondering this all night…” Slowly, he brought his hand up to her shoulder and fiddled with her dress strap. “Are these bows the only thing holding this dress up right now?”

They were. And she had taken great care earlier that evening to make sure the dress had been tied securely. 

“Mmmhmm,” she managed to get out as he kissed her shoulder and moved towards her neck. 

“Interesting, we’ll come back to that later.” 

In the meantime, Harry put them back in their position from earlier, right down to the way his knee was wedged between her legs. Her dress rode up so the hem was just hitting the tops of her thighs. 

“Fuck, you’re so pretty, Cass.” 

His fingers ghosted over her inner thigh and she sighed. And then, in a feat of strength that surprised her, Harry slid his hands to the backs of her thighs and hoisted her up. Instinctively, her legs wrapped around his waist and she let him carry her over to the bed, where he settled himself on the edge but kept her securely seated on his lap. They were so close, she could feel the vibrations from his voice, which sounded rough to her ears. As he was talking, she continued peppering kisses along his jawline, cheeks, lips, neck - anywhere as long as he kept talking. 

“...Sometimes, I used to see you in class or in the h-hallway and just think about how fucking pretty you are. Like one time, we were doing a s-socratic seminar and you were talking about pathos or logos - ahh - and I’m pretty sure I forgot every counterpoint I wanted to make. And you had this like cream colored sweater on and you just looked so - fucking pretty. Kept worrying your lip while you waited to make your point.”

Oddly enough, she also remembered that day in class. It was last November, so before Harry and Kelly got together, and she had kept thinking it was odd that he wasn’t participating in the socratic seminar. Mrs. Holden had to prompt him to answer a couple times and Harry had done that absolutely infuriating _jumping off Cassandra’s point_ thing guys always do. It had seemed to snap him out of whatever funk he was in and they had gone back and forth over their interpretations of Lady Macbeth’s sleepwalking scene for the rest of the period. They had both gotten a 95. 

“- Or when you went to Junior/Senior with Ryan Watts - lucky fucking bastard. God, you looked so hot in that dress. Reminds me of this one,” he said as he fingered the strap he was presently sliding down her shoulder. 

She ducked her head. Ryan had thought she looked nice, but the evening had been pretty uneventful and the two of them hadn’t really talked after. He had graduated in the spring and was going to Colby in the fall. 

But Cassandra remembered that Harry had gone alone to Junior/Senior that year. And he had definitely been drunk - she really had to figure out his breathalyzer secret. He had told her she looked _passably decent for once_ and then had spilled punch all over his shirt and onto her shoes, as well. They had argued about whose fault it was during the one slow dance of the night, which may have contributed to Ryan not talking to her again after the dance. 

She sighed. “They literally look nothing alike.”

He hummed and kissed her left shoulder, just where the strap was supposed to fall before he pulled at the bow slowly, unraveling it. 

“Don’t know about that. You've worn a lot of dresses and skirts recently, though…” he trailed off, but she understood his meaning perfectly. 

“Don’t flatter yourself.”

“Well, I like the skirts and dresses.” She giggled. “See, now this is your turn to say _Harry, I like when you wear_ …”

And then he slipped his right hand underneath the skirt of her dress and raked his fingertips over the lace of her underwear. She grinded against his hand. 

“Hmmm,” she sighed, “I guess I like - ahh - when you wear those stupid button downs. You always look so put together…”

“Yeah?” He slipped his fingers underneath her underwear band and dragged them along her folds. All she could manage was a nod as he pressed his thumb against her clit. 

“Can you - ahh - can you do what you did on the couch the other day - to start at least.”

He looked beyond pleased with himself. “Liked that, did you?” 

She nodded, thinking of how she tried to recreate the moment in her room later that night after she’d gotten home, but it wasn’t the same. Not without Harry’s weight pressing on her or his scent around her or his words whispered against her skin. 

“You know I liked it, Harry.” She felt her leg falling asleep and shifted on his lap. “But can we - can I lay down?”

“Yeah, yeah - sure.” 

Trying to maintain some dignity, she got off his lap and crawled over to the top of the bed. Her head was propped up by the pillows, but she had sunk a little further down. And then, once she got settled, Harry bracketed his knees on either side of her thighs and leaned on his elbows as he kissed her slowly, like they had all the time in the world. For all she knew they could’ve because she had no idea how long they were like that, it was only broken by Harry’s voice breaking her out of her haze an indeterminate amount of time later. 

“Hey Cass?” he rasped out. All she could manage was a hum as he slid one hand up her thigh. It sent a pleasant tingle throughout her entire body. “Can I try something?” 

Something about his tone made her open her eyes and he continued: “I mean, I’ve never done this for a girl before, but I think it might help...”

“Okay,” she said slowly. 

He rolled off her and propped himself up on his elbow on her left side. “Well, since it’s your first time and everything it might help if I went down on you first - if you’d like?”

_Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy. Shit._

“Umm - I uhh sure.” Heat flooded to her cheeks. No - heat flooded everywhere on her body, while goosebumps ran up and down her arms. “Y-yeah, that would - be cool.”

 _That would be cool_ \- seriously, Cassandra? He was literally seconds from putting his face between her thighs and all she could say was _that would be cool_?

Harry sighed in relief, like he was worried she would have said no or something completely ridiculous, and then leaned over to kiss her. “You wanna take off your dress or you want me to do it?”

It should’ve been a pretty straightforward answer to a pretty straightforward question. 

Like he had seen her in a bikini before, it should not have been that much different for him to see her in her underwear. But it was. Also coupled with the fact that she was very much not wearing a bra with her dress, so once he took it off, everything would be out there. 

Her scar would be on full display. Granted, you could see part of it whenever she wore a bathing suit and Harry had gotten fairly acquainted with it last Saturday night, but something about having him see all of it felt so personal and _intimate_. 

And she didn’t want him to be weirded out by it. Cassandra, herself, was both fascinated and grossed out by it. It was puckered and pink and - it was _ugly_. But it was also _her_ , an intrinsic part of her. 

“I’ll do it.” She sat up and grabbed the hem of the dress, pulling it over her head. Harry’s eyes widened and she suddenly felt like the most beautiful girl in the world. 

“God, you’re so fucking perfect, Cass.”

Despite the fact that he was about to bury his face between her thighs, it was his words that made her blush and she ducked her head as she laid back down against the pillows. 

“And you’re smart -” he licked her neck, which caused her to giggle “- and pretty -” he kissed her scar, sucking on the skin slightly “- and kind of mean to me sometimes -” he kissed her stomach, just above the waistband of her underwear “- and give really good blow jobs -” 

The giggle she was about to let out turned into a gasp once he put her legs over his shoulders and pulled her closer to his face. Then, he started making his way up her thighs, pressing kisses and leaving marks as he made his way closer and eventually slid her underwear down her legs, which already felt like jelly. 

And then, it was so much. _So much_. His fingers, his mouth, the way his eyes were impossibly wide when he briefly looked up at her from between her thighs - all of it was so much. His hair was completely disheveled from when she kept dragging her fingers through it and his lips were plump and red and - _god_ \- his hands - when not doing sinful things between her thighs - were holding her hips down against the mattress. 

But it was his voice - a strangled _atta girl, Cass - I can tell you’re close_ \- that finally sent her over the edge. 

She had thought her moans and pants and whimpers earlier were loud, but they all paled in comparison to this. Thankfully, no one else was around to hear them. After her back arched off the bed one last time, Harry slowly pulled away, but not before leaving a couple butterfly kisses near the birthmark on her right thigh. 

Her chest was heaving up and down, but she still managed to ask: “you sure that was your first time?”

He licked his lips and nodded, looking a little too pleased with himself. “Yup.”

Suddenly, it was like Harry hadn’t just given her the most earth shattering orgasm of her life thus far. She wanted more.

“Take your shirt off.” 

He huffed out a laugh, but did as she asked - no, _commanded_. The t-shirt made its way to the floor and then he crawled on top of her. As always, his chest was almost warm to the touch and she dug her nails into his shoulders as he kissed her. This must have been how Harry felt after she went down on him earlier. There was something _stirring_ about knowing that the lips that were bringing her to orgasm only minutes ago were now kissing her so tenderly. 

He still had his jeans on, but with the way he was laying on top of her, she could feel him practically straining against them. 

“Hold on.” He rolled onto the empty space next to her and shucked his jeans off. They both just laid on their backs for a moment, catching their breath. 

“You sure about this, Cass?”

She turned on her side to look at him and he followed suit. Even in the room’s relative darkness, she could still make out every feature on Harry’s face. Every freckle, mole, or hair out of place. His gorgeous eyes and plump lips. And his slightly crooked nose. 

Was he doing the same thing with her? Did he see what she saw? Was he thinking about how beautiful she looked? Or the wave of affection he felt looking at her? If he felt for her even half of what she felt for him in this moment - this exact, perfect moment - then she was the luckiest girl in the world. 

“Yeah,” she whispered finally, “I’m sure.”

He smiled bashfully before leaning in to kiss her. Slowly and purposefully, like they had all the time in the world. And again, she supposed, for tonight, they did. 

Eventually, he rolled on top of her. He paid more than sufficient attention to her breasts, making her heartbeat quicken so much she was sure he could hear it. In response, she dug her nails into his back, holding him there. His hand slipped down between their bodies and settled between her legs. She shifted underneath him and let out a whimper - god, she was still so wet. 

“You ready?”

“Y-yeah.” She sounded a little breathless. 

Harry’s chest heaved up and down, like he was out of breath, too. 

“Alright, can you get the condom in my wallet?” She blindly reached her hand out for his wallet on her dresser and slid one of the little foil packets out of the fold. Was she supposed to do this part? Her hesitancy must have shown because he just smiled at her and took it from her hand. “Don’t worry, I’ll take care of it.”

His boxers made their way to the floor on the other side of her bed and she could hear him putting on the condom. This was it. This was what the entire evening had been leading up to for them. He kissed her soundly as he lined himself up and slowly - and then suddenly - he was inside her. 

“Is that good?” 

She nodded. It wasn’t entirely comfortable yet - the best way she could describe as it was a pinch. But then Harry shifted positions just slightly and she was starting to understand what all the books and songs were talking about. 

It simultaneously felt like not enough and too much at once. She had never been this close to another person before and she wanted to be closer still. He groaned and it sent a bolt through her entire body. As she looked into his eyes as he rocked above her, there was so much she wanted to say to him - to tell him. 

“H-Harry, I -”

He sighed and smiled. “I know, me too.”

She wrapped her legs around his upper thighs, hoping for more leverage to get closer to him. Following her lead, he thrusted his hips faster and huffed out a breath against her ear. Her hands wrapped around the back of his neck and she pulled him down for a kiss as they let out little pants and groans against each other. It was euphoric, feeling their bodies in sync like this. 

And she was so close - _so fucking close_ \- that she thought she would go mad if she didn’t find her release soon. But Harry beat her to it. With a _just like that, Cass_ moaned against her ear, his body stiffened and he came. He laid against her chest for a moment before he tilted his head up to kiss her and then rolled off her. 

They both laid on their backs, staring up at the ceiling fan as their chests heaved up and down. It was - well, it both completely exceeded and fell short of her expectations at the same time. 

She knew most girls didn’t orgasm their first time having sex - or even subsequent times after that - but Harry had done such a good job when he went down on her that her expectations had been pretty high. Maybe that had been the problem? But again, this wasn’t to say that she hadn’t enjoyed it or that he was bad at sex. She had been _so close_. Thirty seconds more would’ve done her in, no problem. 

Harry turned his head to look at her expectantly. 

She smiled. “That was -”

“- I know you didn’t come, you don’t have to lie about it.” He said it so bluntly that she giggled. “Don’t you know you’re not supposed to laugh at a guy in bed, Pressman?” he teased, which just made her laugh even harder. 

“I’m - I’m not, I swear,” she said through her giggles, which only disproved her point. 

He shook his head and leaned over her. “Now you’re in for it…”

Her eyes widened. “What’re you - Harry!” she shrieked as his fingers pinched her sides. God, she was so ticklish. He pulled her onto his lap. 

“I’m not done with you yet, Cass.”

(He more than made up for it the second time.) 

\-------

Cassandra woke up slowly the next morning. It was early. Much earlier than she normally woke up based on where the sun was peeking into her room. She rolled over onto her back and let out a little groan as she stretched, hoping she could go back to sleep. Until she remembered why she had a slight discomfort between her legs that morning. 

She rolled onto her left side to see that Harry was still laying next to her, seemingly passed out - and completely naked under the sheet, while Cassandra had thrown on his t-shirt last night when she got back from the bathroom after the _second round_. 

He looked so peaceful while he was sleeping. A smile almost played on his lips and Cassandra had a feeling he was waking up, as well. 

Slowly, she dragged her fingers through his hair. The morning light danced across it, making it appear lighter than normal, even if it was beyond messy. She noticed a mark on his neck, just above his collarbone. 

_She did that_. 

His eyes finally flickered open slightly and he let out a sigh. “Hey,” he said sleepily and then burrowed further into his pillow. 

“Hi.”

“What time is it?”

Cassandra sat up slightly and leaned her weight on her elbow to glance at the clock on her nightstand. “Six twenty-two.”

Harry groaned. “My dad doesn’t get up till seven thirty, go back to sleep.” He pulled her closer and pressed lazy kisses to her shoulder where the t-shirt had slipped. She rested her head on his chest and he aimlessly played with her hair. 

“You look really pretty in the morning.” She lifted her head up slightly to meet his eye and give him a look.

If anything, she was more self conscious in the morning. Daylight brought out all sorts of imperfections that the night hid.

Instead, she just chuckled and laid back down on his chest. “You do, too.”

He kept playing with her hair, alternating between twirling it around his finger and running his hands through it. “What time did you say it was again?” 

“Mmmm almost six thirty.”

“Oh, really?”

He smiled at her devilishly and scooped her up in his arms. She let out a surprised shriek that turned into a giggle and ultimately ended up on her back with Harry leaning over her. 

“Still got some time left before I gotta head out then…”

As he said this, his hand slowly inched up her thigh and he hitched her leg around his hip. Just as he leaned down to kiss her, Cassandra spoke - no, she squeaked: 

“- Do you want something to eat?”

He stilled. “What?” 

“Are you hungry? We can have breakfast or a coffee or - something.”

His eyebrows furrowed. “You good, Cass?” She hummed, trying to seem nonchalant. “You can tell me if something’s...wrong.”

Now she was just embarrassed. And painfully aware that Harry was naked on top of her. “I would, I promise.”

And then a look of concern crossed over his face and he practically scrambled off her. “- I didn’t hurt you last night, did I?”

“No! Oh my god, no.” He didn’t look convinced. “Harry, seriously, no - and I don’t regret it either, I can see you panicking. I’m just - processing...”

“Oh, okay. That’s - that’s fine. I just - okay.” His cheeks were bright red. 

Somehow, she felt worse now. “Here, maybe we can just lay here for a while or...?”

“Yeah?” She nodded and gave his hand a squeeze. “Okay, I’m gonna go to the bathroom, but I’ll be right back.”

He kissed her so quickly, she didn’t even have time to respond, and then he crawled back over to his side of the bed. 

“Do you know where my - oh, found ‘em.” He snatched his boxers up off the floor and Cassandra pointedly looked the other way as he put them on. 

“It’s down the hall, right?” 

She nodded. “Yup, third door on the right.”

“Cool. I’ll just -” He thumbed over his shoulder and was off. 

Once she heard the bathroom door close, Cassandra slapped her hand against her forehead and groaned. God, why was she so fucking _awkward_? He was so sweet and _normal_ and Cassandra was _awkward_. 

And she really had enjoyed herself last night. Both times. It was really nice, but she felt like if she kept telling Harry that then it would seem like she was overcompensating or something. She didn’t want to be _awkward_ around him. 

Harry had always been a physical person - and she didn’t quite mean in _that way_. He was expressive and used his hands to talk and his presence always seemed to take up the entire room. So, of course, that would translate into how he behaved with a girlfr - with a _girl_. 

And Cassandra was the exact opposite. She was a bit reserved - whether in her demeanor or how she dressed - and had never had a boyfriend or anything like that before. Harry was her first - in so many ways. Maybe it just showed how _different_ they were? What different stages they were at. In life, with each other - with everything. And maybe he wanted someone more like him?

She realized he was probably going to come back soon and figured she should get herself together and, despite Harry saying how pretty she looked in the morning, she should probably get herself situated or fix her hair or something. She thought she had some gum or a tin of mints in her nightstand, which would probably help. 

Just as she popped a mint and ran her hands through her hair, she heard the bathroom door open and Harry’s footsteps coming down the hallway. 

He paused in the doorway before coming back into her bedroom, though he didn’t get back into bed yet. And that didn’t exactly bolster her already dwindling confidence either. She tightened the top sheet and quilt around her waist. Thank god she had thrown his t-shirt on last night when she had gone to the bathroom. 

Instead of going around to the other side of the bed and getting back under the covers, he sat on the corner by her feet. 

“What’s up?” he asked softly. 

She tried to play it off. “Hmmm what?”

He sighed and rubbed her thigh through the quilt. “I know you, Cass. I know when you’re freaked out.”

“I’m not freaked out, per se. Just - this is all new for me and I don’t want you to think that I didn’t like it - or you - but it’s a lot to process. And like I know you probably do this a lot, so it’s not as big of a deal -”

His jaw clenched. “-I’ve had sex with two people, Cassandra. And you’re one of them, so don’t - that’s not - it’s still a big deal to me, too, okay?”

She leaned forward to grab his hand. God, why couldn’t she do anything right today? “I know that - well, I know that now.”

Her thumb ghosted over his knuckle. Back and forth, back and forth. He closed his eyes for a moment and sighed. 

“Will it make you feel better if I have something to eat?” 

The question was so sudden - and frankly a bit silly, but more importantly really sweet - that she giggled. “Yes, Harry. It would make me feel better if you ate something. What do you want?”

“Well, for starters, I would love my shirt back…” His eyes drifted down to the grey t-shirt she was still wearing. 

She smiled. “Fine, don’t look.” 

He slapped his hand over his eyes and she scrambled out of bed to her dresser and got out Harry’s grey sweatshirt that she had never returned and a pair of running shorts. Then she threw her hair into a ponytail before tossing his t-shirt onto her bed. 

All the while, Harry kept his hand over his eyes and didn’t peek. God, he was such a fucking _nerd_. But she really liked that about him. 

She liked that Harry Bingham, the most popular guy at West Ham High, was sitting half naked on her bed with his hand over his eyes because she asked him not to look. How was he this fucking cute? She bit her lip in thought and approached him slowly. 

“Don’t peek.” 

She stood between his legs and placed her hands on his shoulders. Right away, he moved his hand from his eyes - though kept them closed - and put both hands on her hips. 

“You can open your eyes.”

His face lit up with a smile. “Goes from my t-shirt to my sweatshirt. God, you’re so cute.”

She nudged his shoulder. “You do realize I’m keeping this, right? Like you’re not getting this back anytime soon.”

“Well,” he said while he made circles on her hips with his thumbs, “what if I want something of yours…”

“I’m not giving you my underwear,” she smarted.

He feigned shock. “Mind out of the gutter, Pressman. Jesus Christ, one night of _debauchery_ and she’s ready to -”

“- Shut up, you want to go downstairs now?” He nodded. “You should put some clothes on though, no one needs to see that,” she teased. He rolled his eyes, but put his shirt on before going to the other side of the bed to get his jeans and sneakers.

For all their talk of getting something to eat, they just ended up having a glass of water. Harry staved off a cup of coffee in the hopes that he would fall back asleep when he got home, though she knew it was pointless. She was sitting on the kitchen counter, legs dangling off the side, with Harry standing next to her. 

“I’m really happy you stayed over with me last night.”

He placed his hands on either side of her legs on the counter, trapping her in with his body. “Me too, Cass.” She leaned down to kiss him. 

“I should go,” he said eventually, like he didn’t really want to. And then he continued kissing her, further delaying the point. His hands slid around her waist and she never wanted him to let go. “You’re making it very hard to leave…”

She giggled. “That was the idea.”

And then he pulled back suddenly and slapped his hands against his thighs. “Ahh, no I really gotta go. My dad’s gonna give me so much shit if he sees me come in.”

Cassandra slid off the counter and they held hands on their way to the front door, where Harry gave her one final kiss.

“Alright, see you later?” His cheeks were flushed. 

“See you later.”

She leaned one shoulder against the door frame, to watch him walk down the driveway and waited for him to turn around one last time. Once he did about halfway down, she gave him a little wave and was rewarded with a wink. It sent butterflies through her stomach and she couldn’t wait to see him again. 

\-------

It was still relatively early when Harry left, but Cassandra was unable to fall back asleep, so she decided to take a shower and have some actual breakfast before her grandparents came home around lunchtime. The sun was shining by the time she got downstairs again and she plopped herself down on the couch to watch some morning television. 

The anchors were chatting about getting their kids ready for back-to-school and last minute Labor Day Weekend escapes and she welcomed the mindless chatter. 

Should she have felt different? Her body certainly looked different, as she discovered in the shower. A slew of bruises were already forming along her neck and there was one on her thigh that made her blush. 

Should she tell someone about it? Call Allie to gush about it and come clean about Cape Boy’s true identity? And what had she been about to say last night?

 _Harry, I_ \- and then his _I know, me too_

Some much of her relationship with Harry was things left unsaid, thoughts they never allowed themselves to fully speak into existence. What _had_ she been trying to say? 

_Harry, I think I’m close? Harry, I like you? Harry, I love you?_

No, she didn’t - she _couldn’t_ feel that way about him. She liked him - a lot. But no, she did not love him. It was that post coital haze or whatever you wanted to call it. Girls always formed a strong emotional attachment to their first, it was just hormones. 

Her phone buzzed on the coffee table and she snatched it up, already knowing it was him. Or - well, hoping it was him. She smiled once she saw his name on her lock screen. 

_so my dad was already up when i got home…_

_Oh did you get in trouble?_

_not exactly…  
just a bit of a talking to about being respectful_

_Somehow that’s worse_

_he didn’t think jeans and yesterday’s shirt were probably too comfortable to sleep in but he was really cool about it  
and he said you and your grandparents are invited over for dinner tonight, bit of a ‘last hurrah’ before you leave on saturday  
those were his words, not mine_

_We’ll be there, I’m sure Nana will like not having to cook, what time? I think they’re getting home after lunch_

_he said six, we’re getting lobsters  
and then you and i can hang out after if you want?_

_I mean, I guess I can hang out with you…_

_shut up, you know i’d come over again right now if you’d let me_

She blushed. It wasn’t that she wouldn’t let him, she just didn’t trust herself to be around him yet. 

_but my dad’s gonna rest this afternoon so ken and i have to go to the store and everything if you want to come with?_

Should she tag along? She didn’t want to appear clingy or anything, not so soon after last night. No, she would hang out at the house today. Spend some quality time with - well, she would spend some time with herself and wait for her grandparents to come home. Hear all about their concert, the hotel, everything.

_I’m gonna have to pass, but you guys can swing by on your way home if you want?_

It took him a little longer to respond. 

_okay, cool  
i’ll text you if we swing by, but if not i’ll see you at dinner_

_Sounds good, see ya!_

_bye cass_

\-------

Dinner was nice. They ate outside on the Binghams’ terrace in an attempt to cut down on the mess with the lobsters. Cassandra had never had a lobster before, it had never really struck her fancy, especially after seeing them literally be boiled alive. But Mr. Bingham insisted and since it was one of their last nights and she was caught up in the festive spirit, she had one. 

It was delicious and she was pissed she missed out on six weeks of lobster because she was squeamish. So, her first lobster dinner had been a success, baring Harry’s whispered comment _another first to check off the list for you_. She stomped on his foot underneath the table and no one was the wiser. As it was, she already felt a bit fidgety around her grandparents, worried they somehow _knew_ what happened. 

After a dessert of cannolis Nana had gotten from a North End bakery on her way home from Boston, the six of them went for a walk on the beach. Everyone paired off: her grandpa and Mr. Bingham were talking about some deal Mr. Bingham was trying to close at work, while Nana and Kennedy were talking about - honestly, Cassandra had no idea what they were talking about, but they looked like they were plotting something. 

And then, it was just her and Harry. 

“Do you think,” she looked around to make sure no one could overhear her, “anyone could _tell_?”

He looked amused. “No, Cass. I don’t think anyone could tell that we slept together.”

She swatted him. “Shut up, you joke now, but Nana will skin you alive if she finds out.”

They continued walking down the beach, side by side, not touching, but just being comfortable and content with each other. It was one of those rare, perfect late summer evenings. And Cassandra wanted to soak it up for as long as she could. Just being with Harry, being with her family, being _happy_. The thought made her reach out and grab his hand. They intertwined their fingers before Harry wrapped his arm around her shoulders and pulled her closer to him. The waves lapped at their toes and it was a bit awkward to walk now, but it was still nice. 

“Wish we could just stay here,” Harry said softly. 

“Think I could live here full time, but only if you buy me a house?” she teased. 

“And which one would you want?”

She tapped her pointer finger against her chin in thought. “Hmmm, what about the McAvoys'?”

Harry laughed. “Think that’s a bit out of my price range.”

“Well…” It should’ve been the end of the joke, but she looked up and saw where they were. She stopped walking and put her back to the ocean. Harry fell into place beside her so that he was between her and their families. “What about that one?”

The house she pointed to had always been one of her favorites. It was right on the beach, classic shingle style with weathered shingles and white trim. To be honest, it looked like almost every house on the Cape, but was half the size of the ones in their neighborhood. 

But what Cassandra had always loved about it was the sizable lawn and garden it had before the grass leveled off and sloped down into the dune and beach below. 

“That one, really?” He sounded more curious than judgmental. 

“It’s perfect, just the right size. Not too big, so my entire family couldn’t come down and visit at the drop of a hat. And the garden looks so cute and peaceful, I love the hydrangeas and the beach roses. Like I can just imagine reading out there on a nice day and being able to see Nantucket when I woke up. Or having dinner on the lawn as the sun went down.”

Harry tilted his head to get a better look. “It’s probably, what - three bedrooms? Bath and a half?”

She nodded. “It definitely needs some work, but yeah, it’s all I need.”

As she said this, he wrapped his arms around her and hugged her from behind, allowing them to look up at the house together. 

“I can see it.” She could feel his voice rumble against her ear. They stood there for a few moments, utterly content, and then detached themselves from each other when Kennedy and Nana got a little closer. 

Kennedy had a wicked smile on her face as she approached and her and Nana shared a conspiratory smile. “Home shopping?” 

“Shut up.” 

Harry ruffled her hair and they pushed each other around for a bit until he kicked some sand at her and Kennedy ran off screaming to their dad. 

“Dad! Tell Harry to stop.”

Mr. Bingham leveled him with a hard stare. “Harry’s already on thin ice…” And that shut him up pretty quickly. 

Once the sun started to set in earnest, the group set off back home, with Nana and grandpa heading back to their house, while Cassandra went with the Binghams. Her and Harry were planning on hanging out and watching a movie or something. While Harry looked for something to watch, Cassandra scrolled through her _Instagram_ feed. She smiled when she came across a story from _therealkennyb_. 

Kennedy hadn’t snapped any pictures of her and Harry since that first night at the drive-in. And those hadn’t been nearly as intimate or honest as the picture she took of them on the beach earlier that night. 

The picture would explain Kennedy’s knowing smile when she and Nana had come up to them earlier. It was when Harry had his arms around her and they were looking up at the house Cassandra loved so much. You could see her pointing up at it and Harry’s head was resting on her shoulder so he could hear what she was saying. Again, you couldn’t really tell it was her, just that she had blonde hair and was wearing an oversized sweatshirt and a pair of linen shorts. 

Kennedy had included a brief caption - _home shopping?_ \- and geotagged the location as Chatham. 

It was really sweet even if she felt a little awkward that other people - read her grandparents and Harry’s dad and sister and whoever saw it on Kennedy’s story - were privy to the relatively private moment. But the butterflies that she got looking at the picture more than made up for it. 

“Look.” Cassandra held her phone out for Harry to see. 

He chuckled. “Glad Ken managed to get a pic of you extorting me for a house.”

“We really shouldn’t have anyone privy to that, can’t have that on my record,” she joked. 

“I can ask her to take it down, if you want?” he said, not picking up on her joking tone. 

She shot him a look. “No, it’s really cute. I just didn’t know she took it - would explain why she looked so pleased with herself, though. I’m gonna ask her for the original.”

“You do that.” He kissed her cheek. “So, what do you want to watch?”

They ended up watching this _HBO_ show Harry liked, but Cassandra had never seen before. It was good, but definitely a Harry show - rich people dealing with a family business and all the stupid problems being rich and powerful brought. They watched two episodes and were almost done with the third when Harry said he was thirsty and asked if she wanted a drink, too. 

“Sure, water’s fine.” He paused the TV and then dashed off to the kitchen. 

While he was gone, she leaned forward to check the time on what she thought was her phone on the coffee table. With a tap, the lock screen popped up and she realized she hit Harry’s phone instead of her own. The clock showed it was only 11:10, so she still had a bit before her curfew, but she froze upon seeing a string of message notifications from earlier in the evening. 

_Kelly 💙: Miss you! Can’t wait to see you next week  
Kelly 💙: I saw you and that girl on Kennedy’s story again. Thought you said nothing was going on?_

Oh. 

_Oh_. 

Fuck, fuck, _fuck_. Stupid fucking - _Cassandra_. 

Why did she think this was going to be different? The stupid blue heart emoji. Suddenly, she felt _small_. Kelly and Harry were still texting - but when did they talk? The timing was suspicious. Did Harry text her first? Was it after they slept together? After she kind of brushed him off earlier that morning? She had been a little awkward afterward, but she didn’t think it was anything out of the ordinary - at least for her. 

Maybe Harry hadn’t liked it or maybe she did something wrong? Or he realized how much he missed Kelly after being with someone else? But he was _so sweet_ that morning, so why would he have texted Kelly? 

Unless he was pretending - _no, he wouldn’t_.

_Thought you said nothing was going on?_

She squeezed her eyes shut and willed herself not to start crying on the Binghams’ couch while Harry was tinkering around in the kitchen. 

“- Here you go.” His voice made her jump and he held a glass of water in front of her face. She took it, not really paying attention. 

“Oh - uhh thanks.”

He sat down next to her and took a large sip of his own water. “You good?”

“Huh? Yeah,” she shook her head, “sorry, just getting tired.”

He leaned forward to get his phone off the coffee table and Cassandra held her breath as he looked at the screen. His brow furrowed slightly, but other than that he didn’t really react or respond to the message. 

“Uhh we’ll probably be able to finish this before you have to go home, it’s almost 11:30.”

“Okay.” The show resumed in front of her, but she wasn’t really watching anymore. All she could focus on were the texts. 

_Thought you said nothing was going on?_

God, all she wanted to do was go home and cry. Wrap herself up in her quilt and not come out of her room for hours. She hadn’t felt this _small_ and, frankly, _stupid_ in so long. At least not where a boy was involved. 

Next to her on the couch, Harry also seemed a bit fidgety. It didn’t seem like he was paying that much attention to the show - Cassandra lost all interest when they kept going on about stock prices and private equity buyouts - and he kept looking at his phone on the coffee table. A sick part of her wanted to text him something - an article, a meme, anything - just to see what he saved her contact as in his phone. And how fucking psycho was that?

The episode ended a few minutes later and Harry asked if she wanted to head home. It felt awkward and stilted and they barely touched each other on the walk home. His hand grazed against hers, but it was in such a stark contrast to how they were earlier that evening walking on the beach. And even more so compared to how they were last night. 

Had it only been a day since they slept together? 

It seemed like they got to her grandparents’ house in record time, probably due to the fact that they weren’t caught up in each other and dawdling like they normally did. But like every night, he still walked her up to the front stoop. 

“So, I’ll see you tomorrow?” 

She nodded. “Yeah.”

“Night, Cass.”

He gave her a quick kiss goodbye. Nothing like how he normally said good night to her. And without waiting for her to say anything further, he started off down the steps and across the front lawn back to his own house. He hadn’t even waited for her to get inside like he normally did. He was probably in a rush to get home and call Kelly or something. Say she was right, nothing was going on. 

As Cassandra trudged up the stairs to her room, she realized this was the first time in weeks she had gotten home after her curfew. And she didn’t even have anything to show for it. 

\-------

She didn’t sleep well that night and woke up groggy and cranky the next morning. The texts constantly flashed through her mind. 

_Thought you said nothing was going on?_

_you said nothing was going on_

_nothing was going on_

_nothing_

To be fair, it wasn’t Kelly’s fault. For all Kelly knew, nothing _was_ going on. Because that’s what Harry told her. But why? And when?

It just really fucking _sucked_. Really fucking sucked. That all her fears about her and Harry not making a thing of this when they got back to school weren’t actually all that ridiculous. He really had no plan for them to carry on whatever the fuck they were once they went back to school on Tuesday. It was just some summer thing for him. 

_Thought you said nothing was going on?_

_you said nothing was going on_

_nothing was going on_

_nothing_

But a soft, slightly heartbroken voice in the back of her mind kept reminding her how sweet he always was with her and how often he told her he liked her. So she didn’t know what to believe. 

Her eyes were puffy from crying last night and she looked like crap, so the last thing she wanted to do was get out of bed and face anyone, let alone Harry. And then, like he knew she was finally awake, her phone vibrated with a text from him. 

_you want to go down to the beach later? it’s supposed to clear up this afternoon and i figured we should talk_

So, he gets one text from Kelly and now he suddenly wants to talk? Just like that?

_I have to pack_

It would maybe take her half an hour to pack - hell, she could probably even do it tomorrow morning, but she was _mad_ at him. He had put off talking about this for the last two weeks, a couple more hours wouldn’t hurt. 

_okay  
well maybe after you pack?  
what about 4? before dinner?  
we can go for a walk or something? or we could get ice cream after dinner? i’m pretty sure you still owe me_

It was currently ten thirty. That gave her just over five hours. Five hours to talk herself out of any plans she would make ten times over. It would also give Harry just over five hours to talk himself out of any plans he would make ten times over.

_Okay, that works!_

The exclamation point may have been a bit extra, but she didn’t want to come across as surly. Not after last night. 

_cool, see you then_

His message didn’t warrant a further response or follow up, so she was a bit surprised when her phone buzzed again after she tossed it on the other side of her bed. Thankfully, the string of messages were from Allie and would hopefully provide a perfect distraction. 

_oh my god cassie  
clark’s party last night was fucking wild  
becca hooked up with a SENIOR  
literally never seen the guy before in my life, but apparently he and becca took photography together or something last year??? it was fucking WILD_

_Haha no way, good for Becca_

_What’s his name?_

_connor sullivan?? he plays tennis_

_Oh he’s nice. We had pre calc and APUSH together_

_Who drove?_

_oh my god seriously MOM??_

_I realized how lame that was the second I hit send_

_at least you’re self aware and i did! i’ll have you know i was very responsible. even brought kelly aldrich home - she was a MESS_

So much for a welcome distraction. Cassandra sat up in bed.

_Wait really?_

_yup, for the brief time becca was not with her lovely tennis playing senior, kelly was telling becca and literally anyone else who would fucking listen about harry and some girl she thinks he’s been hooking up with at the beach even though literally everyone thought they broke up right when school got out and like all her friends were all ‘fuck her, you’re so much better than her’ and ‘you’re def prettier than her’ and ‘harry doesn’t know what he’s missing’ and all this crap, it was NAUSEATING  
but we all know Harry’s a piece of shit, so like is anyone really surprised?  
it was the talk of the party and everyone was trying to figure out who the girl was  
needless to sayyyyyy dropped kelly off first and then becca and i got mcflurrys to decompress_

Oh fuck fuck - _fuck_.

Most people already didn’t like Cassandra at school and now there was this? _Fuck_. Kelly was one of the most popular girls at school because she was so nice and kind and just _sweet_. And Cassandra just _wasn’t_. She was direct and didn’t hesitate to call people out and challenge them. So, if everyone found out Cassandra was the girl who helped Harry Bingham break Kelly Aldrich’s heart? Forget it. And she didn’t even know who was making the comments? The girls could’ve been people she considered _friends_ of hers for Christ’s sake. Could she count on Harry to stand up for her? For them? And then what Allie had said about him?

Why did all of this have to get so fucking messy? Maybe Harry had been onto something about everything being _easy_ here?

Half in a daze, she typed out a response.

_Oh my god, wild_

_Glad you had a good night though_

_i don’t know if i’d call it good, but it was fun  
anyway soooo excited for you to come home!!!  
mom is planning a ridiculous dinner for sunday, dad might even make a cake????_

_That’ll be nice_

_you sad to leave? how will cape boy cope without you?_

She belatedly realized she was crying and wiped at her eyes and sniffled. _Cape Boy_ would probably cope just fine, especially if he still had Kelly waiting in the wings. Okay, that wasn’t fair, this wasn’t Kelly’s fault. Maybe if Cassandra kept reminding herself of the fact, it wouldn’t hurt so much.

_I don’t know, not sure if it’ll work out_

_what???? noooooo_

_Idk think it was just a summer thing for him_

_We’re supposed to talk tonight_

_nooooo i’m sorry cassie  
i know how much you liked him_

And she still liked him. A lot. And still would for a while, at least.

_It’ll be okay, school’s starting soon anyway and senior fall is always a lot. Wouldn’t be good to have the distraction or anything like that_

_still sucks_

_Thanks Al_

_let me know if you need anything later! i’ll drive out to chatham and beat his prep school ass if i have to_

_Duly noted, I’ll text you_

_i’ll keep my ringer on_

She threw her phone under her pillow, in no mood to deal with any further texts either from Harry or Allie. Right now, she wanted to wallow. The weather outside was a perfect reflection of her mood - cloudy, blustery, and even a bit cool with the threat of rain showers growing stronger by the minute. 

Yeah, she would just lay there for a little longer. Her eyelids were getting heavy and soon enough, she succumbed to slumber. 

\-------

She woke sometime later, though not on her own volition. “Cassie? You alright, honey?” 

Nana was perched at the edge of her bed, looking concerned. The clock on her nightstand read twelve forty-two. She had fallen back asleep for another two hours. 

“Oh.” Cassandra stretched and sat up. “I didn’t sleep well last night. Must’ve fallen back asleep.”

“Hmm, I would’ve thought you’d be out with Harry.” Cassandra just shook her head. “Well, why don’t you come downstairs and I can make you some lunch? You probably haven’t eaten since last night.”

“Okay,” she said softly. Nana patted her leg and gave her a little smile before getting up. Though small, the action brought tears to her eyes. 

“I think he’s gonna break up with me.” Though she spoke quietly, just above a whisper, Nana still paused and turned around. “Harry, that is.”

“Oh?” Nana slowly made her way back over to the bed and sat by Cassandra’s legs. Cassandra took a deep breath and played with the edge of her quilt, trying to avoid her inquisitive stare. 

“We were watching TV last night and he went to get a drink or something and I saw his phone - I didn’t mean to, it was just on the coffee table - and he got a couple texts from this girl.”

“The old girlfriend?” Cassandra nodded and wiped her eyes. “Ah, I see.”

“She saw the picture of the two of us Kennedy posted on her story and, needless to say, she was surprised to see it since Harry told her _nothing was going on_ ,” she sounded bitter, but who cared at this point. 

“And I - I feel really stupid and silly - about all of it. Like this girl is really nice and kind and everyone at school likes her and - Allie told me all these girls were talking about it at this party last night and not in a - positive way. And well, what if when we go back, Harry realizes he doesn’t feel that way about me anymore? Or he doesn’t think it’s worth it to stay together? What if I can’t count on him to stand up for me, like for us? I’ll just be the girl that ruined everything. And he was so _weird_ last night after he got the text and I just -”

Nana was quiet for a moment, mulling this over. “Would you have felt this way if you hadn’t seen those messages from that girl?”

“Maybe?” she admitted. “I mean, we’ve both haven’t been the best about talking about what’s going to happen when we go back to school, but - he’s been more direct about _not_ talking about it. And then this morning he texted me asking if we could talk tonight and it can’t be a coincidence, right?”

“Or it could be that he knows you’re going home tomorrow and wants to talk?”

Cassandra wiped her eyes. “I just really like him and I don’t want to get hurt. We’re so different at school and I don’t -”

“- but you get along so well outside of it. And that's what's important. You’re not going to be stuck in West Ham forever, honey. This summer has only confirmed that. I’m just saying, hear him out. You might be surprised with what you learn. That boy adores you, Cassie.

“But whatever you decide to do, your grandpa and I will be there, okay?” Cassandra ducked her head. “We like Harry, but he’s not my favorite granddaughter.”

Her mouth gaped open in shock. “Nana! You can’t say that.” 

Nana shrugged. “Well, I just did - now come on, let’s get you out of bed. Maybe have some lunch and then I’ll help you pack. Think I still have a load of clothes in the dryer. And you have to look nice when you go over and talk with him later…”

That got a little chuckle out of her. “Fine. Thanks, Nana.”

“Of course, sweetie.”

\-------

At four-o-two, Cassandra knocked at the Binghams’ door, dreading talking to Harry. She fiddled with her sweatshirt - _Harry’s_ sweatshirt - while she waited for someone to answer the door. Guess she would have to give that back now. She always heard boys were really territorial about stuff like that. The door was thrown open. 

“Cassandra!” Kennedy said, all bright and cheery and completely oblivious to Cassandra’s nerves. 

“Hey, Ken. Is Harry here?” She peered around Kennedy’s shoulder once she got into the foyer, hoping he wasn’t there. 

Kennedy nodded. “Yeah, he’s out back -”

“- Who’s at the door - oh, Cassandra. How’re you?” Mr. Bingham asked kindly. 

God, was everyone going to witness this? At least Harry’s mom wasn’t there. Wait, was she? Cassandra hadn’t noticed her BMW in the driveway, so she figured she was safe.

“I’m alright, how’re you guys?”

“Good, Harry and Kenny have been helping me pack up the house before we leave on Monday. I don’t know how often we’ll come down in the fall.” Cassandra nodded politely. “Harry’s out back if you want to see him.”

“Oh great, thanks. I’ll just,” she thumbed over her shoulder towards the backyard, “go see him then.”

And then, just as she was about to set off down the hallway, she spun around on her heel to face them again.

“I just - I just wanted to tell you both how nice it’s been getting to know you this summer. Like, Mr. Bingham, I’d only ever seen you at debate tournaments or backstage at plays and Ken, it’s been awesome hanging out with you and getting to know you. I mean, if it wasn’t for you, Harry and I never would’ve become friends, so I guess I just wanted to say thanks.”

She couldn’t cry, not when this felt like a _goodbye_. She would see them again. It would never be quite the same, but she would see them again.

Mr. Bingham looked at her with a critical eye, like he was trying to piece something together. But before he could get the chance, Cassandra shook herself and spoke again.

“Anyway, you guys said he was out back, right?” They both nodded. “Alright, see you later then.”

Once her back was turned, she let out a breath. God, that was so awful. She had loved spending time with Harry’s family - all the times her and Kennedy jokingly made fun of him or made up their own _Tik Tok_ dances and god - his _dad_. Mr. Bingham had always been so sweet and kind to her, no matter how often she had intruded on family time. He talked to her like a real person and was just such a _good_ dad. Harry was so lucky to have him. 

From the living room, Cassandra could see out onto the lawn where Harry was sitting on a lounge chair, scrolling through his phone. She opened the sliding door quietly and made her way over to him.

“Hey.”

He looked up and smiled once he heard her voice. “Hey, you all packed?”

She nodded a couple times and stood in front of him. “Yup, should be all set. Didn’t realize how many clothes I brought with me or ordered.”

“Not looking forward to doing that…” She wrapped her arms around herself defensively. “Your parents are coming tomorrow afternoon, right?”

“My mom, yeah.”

“Right. Maybe we can hang out in the morning or something?”

“Maybe.” 

He looked at her oddly and she knew he knew something was up. Normally, Cassandra was the one driving the conversation. “We’re not leaving till Monday, traffic’s always slightly better actually on Labor Day, if you can believe it?” 

“Ah. Guess that makes sense.” And then she just stood there, staring at him. He still hadn’t gotten up from the chair. “You want to head down to the beach?”

“Uhh sure, yeah.” 

He got up and they set off across the lawn and down the steps to the beach. They left their shoes at the bottom and started their walk. It was quiet - no, awkward - as they walked down the beach. It was relatively deserted at four o’clock, at least where they were headed.

Cassandra cleared her throat, breaking the silence. “So, I’ve been thinking...” she tried to sound casual, but she wound up fidgeting with her hands. They both stopped walking and were standing further down the beach, by one of the jetties where they used to look for shells. 

Picking up on her, obviously strained, tone, Harry looked at her warily. “Okay…”

“I think we should just be friends.” There. It was out there, it couldn’t be unsaid now. 

“What?” He looked at her like she was crazy. And maybe she was for throwing this all away. 

She plowed on ahead, trying to be strong. “I think we should just be friends. It was too much, too soon, too fast. We got - carried away, I guess.”

“Cass, where is this coming from?” Tears filled her eyes and she had to look away. “Come on, sweetheart. What’s wrong?”

He tried to grab her hand, but she slipped out of his grasp. She wiped her eyes to try and regain her composure, but her voice still came out watery. 

“I saw your phone - last night when we were watching TV - I didn’t mean to, I was just checking the time. But I saw your texts - from Kelly.”

“Okay…” He looked thoughtful, probably trying to recall what the texts said.

It was bad enough she had to read them and they had plagued her thoughts for the past sixteen hours, but now he was going to make her say the words out loud, too? 

“You know, when she said _thought you said nothing was going on_?”

Harry rested his hands on her hips and ducked down to catch her eye. 

“Oh - no, I know what you’re talking about, but it’s not - we talked on the phone once, right before my dad and Ken went back home that week. And nothing was going on with you and me yet, I swear. And I didn’t think you wanted anything to be going on - but what does this have to do with us just being friends? I thought - well I thought we - I mean -”

This was going to be the hard part. Her stomach was in knots and her hands felt sweaty. God, it would be so much easier if he wasn’t looking at her like that. She took a deep breath. 

“Well, I talked to Allie this morning and she told me about how everyone at Clark’s party last night was going on about you and some girl you were hooking up with at the Cape and Kelly was kind of thrown by it and everyone was saying _fuck her, you’re so much better than her and you’re definitely prettier than her, Harry doesn’t know what he’s missing_. And I - I already felt that way beforehand just on my own. I don’t need to hear it from the rest of the school - even if it’s only second hand. And they don’t even know it’s me, so what’re they gonna say then?

“And I like Kelly, I really do. I know this isn’t her fault - Allie said she was kind of bothered by everyone talking about it - and she’s always been so nice to me and she’s good and kind and thoughtful. And people like her.” She wiped her eyes with the heel of her hand. “But people don’t always like me. I’m always too much - too bossy, too opinionated, too much of a know it all, too frigid or prudish or _bitchy_ or whatever. But I like who I am _here_. Who I am with you and my grandparents and your sister and your dad.”

“I like who you are here, too,” he said softly. 

“Exactly, but we don’t live here, Harry. We live _there_ and we’re going to be there for a long time. And what people think and feel and say there affects us and I don’t think either of us are ready for that yet. Trust me, I want it to work, I really fucking do. But I think for now we should just be friends - or something...”

“Or something?” His voice was quiet - sad even.

She matched his tone. “I don’t think either of us need the distraction now.” 

He bit his lip and looked off at the jetty. There were a bunch of seagulls on it, probably due to something in the water. His shoulders were locked and tense and she could've sworn she heard him sniffle. “I don't want to talk about this anymore -”

“-That's the fucking problem,” she cried, “we always put it off and I always let you, but it's not fair. Not to me and not to you.”

Suddenly, he grabbed the back of his neck with his right hand and started pacing. “You wanna talk about not fair? You literally sprung this on me on our last fucking day here -”

“- Because you always put me off? And then suddenly after you get that text, you magically want to talk? What am I supposed to think, Harry? That you’re embarrassed to be with me -”

“- You’re the one who’s worried about what other people are going to think at school, Cassandra! People are gonna say shit, yeah but -”

She threw her head back in frustration. “- But what they’re gonna say to you is not the same thing they’re gonna say to me and can I count on you to -”

“-You were the one who never wanted to tell anyone! All those times you talked to Allie, you ever tell her about me? She’s your fucking sister, Cass -”

They were talking over each other at this point. Each was trying to say their peace, with nary a thought as to what the other was saying. 

“- What if we never fucking talked about this? What if I walked up to you on Tuesday morning and - I don’t know - kissed you in front of everyone or held your hand on the way to class? Can you honestly say you would’ve been okay with that, Har? Hearing all the shitty things people would say? About you and me and -”

She let out a deep breath. “I really like you, Harry. But I don’t want to get hurt and I don’t know if I can count on you not to do that.”

Her voice broke at the end and it was like all the fight came out of her. She was tired and sad and exhausted. But all she wanted at that moment, the only thing that she knew without a doubt would make her feel better, were Harry’s arms around her, telling her it was going to be okay even though it most definitely wasn’t. 

And, like he knew what she was thinking, he stepped forward and wrapped his arms around her. 

“Shit, come here.” She could feel him press at kiss to her hair and then he rubbed his hands up and down her back. “You know how I feel about you, Cass. It’s just - it’s not fair to either of us.”

_Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry._

As she rested her chin on his shoulder, she was struck by how beautiful it was outside that night. The sun was setting and she was again cruelly reminded of how similar this was to the night Harry told her how much he liked her - _I like you so fucking much_ \- and how happy and carefree she felt then compared to now. 

“We’ll talk about it tomorrow, sweetheart, alright? If you need to be friends, we’ll be friends or whatever - we’ll figure it out, but I want to talk about it more.”

She lifted her chin up to look him in the eye and leaned in to give him a kiss. It was a bit desperate on both their ends, like they both knew it was _something_. _Something_ about this was different and final. 

And at that moment, Cassandra knew they weren’t going to talk about it tomorrow. They wouldn’t get a chance. She was going to text her mom as soon as she got back to her grandparents’ house and ask her to come by tomorrow morning instead of tomorrow afternoon to pick her up. 

Because she was scared. And she realized just how much she liked Harry. Just how happy she felt when she was with him, how she buzzed with excitement whenever they held hands or kissed or _anything_. And maybe it was better to end things now before she really got hurt? Before Harry really broke her heart. 

\-------

**Sat, Sep 1, 11:33 AM**

_went to your house but your grandpa said you already left???  
what the fuck cass??_

**2:45 PM**

_we need to talk about this cassandra, it was your idea remember?  
i don’t even know if i want to be friends_

\-------

**Sun, Sep 2, 1:08 AM**

_fuck sorry, that wasn’t true  
i can’t believe you just left_

\-------

**Mon, Sep 3, 5:35 PM**

_just got home, are you around to talk?  
or at least fucking text me back??_

**11:42 PM**

_alright, fine. see you at school tomorrow_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> keep an eye out for part ii - it's going to take place during the entirety of senior year and i have most (!) of it already written
> 
> also i made a [spotify playlist](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1MBtmDHmFub4QEqEL0dqxk?si=hVRxrKjjQT-ZyCwwwBNg4w/) if that’s your thing???


End file.
